


Not Alone

by DazzledGhosts



Series: Not Alone [1]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alpha Victor Nikiforov, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Eventual Smut, Fluff, M/M, Marking, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Mutual Pining, Omega Katsuki Yuuri, Rutting, Scent Marking, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-08
Updated: 2017-08-27
Packaged: 2018-10-16 09:35:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 73,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10568586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DazzledGhosts/pseuds/DazzledGhosts
Summary: Katsuki Yuuri has been training alongside Victor in St. Petersburg for a while. He has been so careful for no one to know that he's an omega. But while skating one day, Victor notices something different. What's that smell coming from Yuuri's neck? Without realizing it, he finds a scent suppressant patch on Yuuri's neck and curiosity wins the better of him. He tugs and is hit directly with that smell of cardamom and honeysuckle.Victor falls into his first ever rut. But not because Yuuri is an omega. But because the omega he is smelling is Yuuri. A story where secondary genders do not define you. Where Yuuri is strong despite everything that comes his way as a result of his omeganess. Where Victor strives to be the best alpha he can, but all he wants is to be Victor and Yuuri. Not Alpha and Omega.





	1. The Warmth

**Author's Note:**

> Hi hi! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this. I feel a bit silly having written it. I'm not too confident. But I've been enjoying all the stories on here so I thought, why not share my own? 
> 
> English is my second language. So I'm sorry if things sound strange. 
> 
> Thank you!

It had been a tiresome day of practice on the rink. Victor was wiping the sweat from his brow while only half listening to Yuri talk about getting dinner. His eyes were focused instead on the center of the rink, where Katsuki Yuuri was still practicing his spins. 

Victor would never tire of watching Yuuri. The way the younger man moved always left him breathless. The expression on his face was that of longing. The sway of his arms spoke of tenderness. His legs, while shorter than Victors, moved fluidly with strength in each gesture. His stamina keeping him going longer than all of them.

“Victor!” Yuri yelled into his ear. 

“Uhuh,” the older man said and felt his mouth turn into a large grin as Yuuri began to skate his way. 

Yuri would have sulked, but he was already use to Victor’s antics when it came to the Japanese man.

Yuuri’s brown eyes were glistening, face flushed pink from practice, and sweat trickling down his neck. Victor quickly grabbed a clean towel from his bag and moved towards Yuuri. He gently dabbed the other’s forehead. 

“Oh… thank you, Victor.” Victor swore that Yuuri’s face pinkened just a bit more. Yuuri reached for the towel but Victor insisted that he help while Yuuri took his skates off. He was still amazed that Yuuri could be so close to him, even now in St. Petersburg. He wanted to bask in each moment. Yuuri hadn’t retired. Yuuri was here with him. While he wasn’t sure exactly what that meant for him, Victor knew he had the time to figure it out.

Yuuri was now sitting and untying his laces. Maybe it was the sweat, but Victor could smell something from Yuuri. It was enticing and comforting. A bit like cardamom. He sat next to Yuuri and leaned in. 

“Yuuri… did you change your soap?” he sniffed a bit more intently. 

Yuuri lifted his head up a bit confused. 

“No…? Why? Do I smell?” he nervously tugged on his collar and tried to sniff himself. “I guess I did sweat a lot… sorry, Victor.” 

“No that’s not what I meant…” 

The smell was stronger now. More potent around Yuuri’s neck. It made Victor’s heart a bit erratic. He felt warmer. 

Victor brushed his pale fingers gently against the spot he suspected the scent was coming from. Yuuri’s shirt was just barely in the way. 

“Are you wearing cologne?” The Japanese man hummed a no, and proceeded to wipe down his blades with a rag. 

Yakov and Yuri had noticed Victor’s behavior. The skater had always maintained close skinship with Yuuri, but something seemed a bit off this time. Victor’s eyes were dilated and his lips parted as if with hunger. His face was starting to become flushed. 

Victor felt thirsty watching Yuuri. His hand was still resting on the other’s neck. A bead of sweat rested just an inch above his finger and he feld an urge to put his mouth there. To taste. 

What was that smell? It was sweet, but not overpoweringly so. It made everything else around Victor seem hazy. 

He had to know.

His finger slipped down Yuuri’s collar and tugged. 

“Victor? What are you...?” Yuuri tried to pull his shirt back up. But Victor wasn’t greeted with Yuuri’s creamy skin, but rather a white patch resting right above the source of the smell. A corner of the patch had begun to peel from Yuuri’s sweat. He was confused. 

“Yuuri,” Victor’s voice turned to velvet. His mouth watered. “Yuuri, what is this?” he wasn’t even aware he asked a question. 

Before Yuuri could answer or push Victor away, the Russian grabbed the loose corner and tugged. His face was so close, so he was hit instantly. 

It was powerful and smelled definitely of cardamom but there was hints of something floral. Perhaps honeysuckle? He couldn’t quite name all the scents but what it was, was unmistakable.

Yuuri slapped his hand on where the patch had been, his eyes now snapped up and looking into Victors. Brown eyes wide with panic. 

Something was wrong.

Victor felt his body tremble and fill with want and need. It was consuming and frightening, but he couldn’t control himself. His hands gripped Yuuri’s shoulders. He was almost panting, trying to fill his lungs more with the scent. His body was reacting immediately, hardening with arousal and trying to tower over Yuuri. 

“Yuuri… Oh Yuuri… you’re an…?” 

“Victor!” Yakov rushed over. “What are you?”

“You’re an omega…?” Victor whispered. And Yuuri’s face reddened. The smell seeped out stronger. It was so rich that Victor could feel it in his lungs. Oh how he wanted to drown in it.  
He pushed Yuuri down immediately, his nose burrowing deep into the crook of the other’s neck. He was breathing it in like it was his first breath in ages. Larger hands cradled the back of Yuuri’s head. His dark hair was so soft.

Yuuri was so so soft.

Yakov tried to pull Victor back but he was stronger. He shoved the older man away without losing his grip on Yuuri. 

“Victor, wait… I can explain,” Yuuri tried to calm him down. He gently pushed against Victor’s chest, but the other man was firm and his body wasn’t listening. 

All he could see was Yuuri. All he could smell was Yuuri. All he could feel, was Yuuri. Oh, Yuuri, Yuuri, Yuuri!

Yuuri’s thigh pressed into Victor’s groin as he tried to squirm away and a growl pushed out of the other’s throat. And Yuuri was surprised to find how aroused Viktor was. Panic began fill his smaller body. 

And Victor could taste it’s acidity taint Yuuri’s smell. He couldn’t think. His instincts had completely taken over. His own pheromones were spreading with each pulse of his heart beat, trying to make Yuuri his. 

He was an alpha presented with the sweetest smelling omega he had encountered in all his 28 years. And it wasn’t just any omega. 

It was his precious Yuuri. His beautiful Yuuri that made music with his body. His Yuuri that sparked life into him.

Someone tried to pry Victor away but he wouldn’t budge. His mouth parted, panting and growling. Moving closer to Yuuri’s glands. His hands were tugging away at the shirt that kept getting in his way. 

Why was Yuuri wearing it? Who was trying to pull him off Yuuri? 

Yuuri’s collar began to rip as Victor pulled. 

Fear filled brown eyes closed shut as the alpha’s hot breath ghosted closer to his scent glands.

“Please don’t...” Yuuri whimpered. 

He waited for teeth to sink in.

But it didn’t come. Victor’s hot breath faded. Yuuri looked up to see tears welling at the corners of Victor’s shut eyes. Beautiful silver lashes glistening wet. The Russian was cradling his arm, where his own teeth were sunk into its flesh. Yuuri could smell the bitter copper of Victor’s blood. 

Someone finally pulled Victor off of him. The warmth of the other’s body was gone, leaving him confused and cold. 

Victor’s teeth were still clamped onto his arm. Yavok and Yuri were trying to create distance by dragging Victor away, but the alpha was heavier than either of them. 

Yuuri watched in absolute confusion. Victor looked lost. He looked wounded and parched. 

“What do you think you’re doing?!” Yuri yelled. 

Victor’s mouth went slack and he released his arm. There was blood on his lips and his eyes were glazed over. 

“This... this is a rut,” Yakov gasped. 

“I… I…” Yuuri stammered. 

“I thought you were a beta?!” the younger Yuri looked accusingly at him. 

“I… Omegas can’t take suppressants for long periods of time. I was using scent blockers. The… the patches…” Yuuri couldn’t get out a coherent sentence. 

“Yurio, you need to leave, you’re still too young of an alpha for this,” their coach gave orders. “Yuuri, go change your shirt and put on more patches if you have any. But first wash up with scent blocking soap.” 

Yuuri was unmoving, watching Victor’s eyes lock with his. Yuuri realized how much of his shoulder was bare from Victor’s tearing. Blue eyes trailed down to Yuuri’s neck and another growl thundered past his throat. Victor’s body sprang towards the omega once more.

“Go now!” Yakov yelled. 

Trembling, he ran to the locker room. He stumbled onto a bench and tried to ground himself. 

Victor’s face had been so close to his. Yuuri remembered how soft the alpha’s silver hair felt against his chin when Victor nuzzled him. His skin tingled from where Victor touched him. Leaving an empty burning. A longing.

A shiver traveled Yuuri’s down arms. 

Victor was filled with so much desire and Yuuri felt it all directed at himself. He had never seen Victor like that. The older man was always so composed and careful. He was so gentle to omegas and betas that no one would suspect him to be an alpha. That is, if it wasn’t for his physique and presence. 

What did Yuuri do to make him snap?

The omega realized he had to wash himself and put on new patches. He began to undress, pulling off his pants and underwear, only to see it wet. Something trickled down his thighs, and in that moment, Yuuri realized he was spilling slick. His body had never reacted this way. Not even in his heats had he been able to produce so much in such little time. It seems Victor’s pheromones had also affected him, but in that panic he failed to notice. 

What was happening? Yuuri was always so careful. Yes he was an omega, but never had anyone reacted to him that way. Not outside of a heat. And he wasn’t due for months.

Suppressants took a tole on an omega’s body. They were like poison if taken for too long. The liver simply cannot keep up. Yuuri wasn’t going to risk his health. Not now. Not when he’s so close to becoming the skater he always wanted to be. 

Not when he was so close to being Victor’s equal.

\---

“Snap out of it, Victor,” Yakov barked while trying to keep the alpha from chasing after Yuuri. He had never seen Victor in a rut. The man was always so composed around omegas to the point he seemed aloof. But here was his student, aroused to the point where his pants seemed like they were going to burst and panting like a crazed animal. Even after Yuuri had left, he wasn’t getting better. 

\---

They rushed Victor to a hospital. Yuuri wasn’t allowed to be near him, even though he had thoroughly washed himself, used scent blockers, and even taken suppressants. He sat in the waiting room awkwardly, trying to not shrink under Yuri and Yakov’s gazes.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Yurio finally whispered. Yuuri expected him to shout and kick him. He was taken back from the teen’s soft voice. 

Lost for words he finally said “I don’t look like what I am…” Yuuri had done everything in his power to look mundane. He let his bangs grow out and cover his face and wore baggy clothing to hide his body. “What I really am costs me my freedom.” He fidgeted, trying to come up with the right words. The blond was staring so intensely. 

“That doesn’t mean you can lie to us,” he accused. The words stung Yuuri. 

“Yurio… can you image a life where you can’t be on the ice?”

“No but that’s not…”

“I presented at seventeen… We all thought I was a beta. I wanted to be a beta. I still do. By then I had been skating for so long. I couldn't have it taken away from me. Imagine everything you’ve accomplished since now, Yuri. Imagine it stripped from you in two years time. All because your body is a bit different.” He was trembling now. Yuuri had always been very realistic about his status as an omega. He knew what it meant and had accepted it. But explaining it now, to this younger boy made him feel raw. “Could you live with yourself if you left the ice over something you had no say in?” He finally looked up into boy’s blue eyes. 

“Yuuri… I…” 

Before he could say anything, the doctor came rushing in. Yakov leaped off his chair. 

“What’s happening to him?”

“He’s just experiencing a rut,” the doctor started to explain. “ I don’t think I’ve seen a case this severe. It can’t be good for his body. We’ve sedated him for now, but he’ll need to find some release soon.”

“What do you mean…?” Yakov was dripping with concern. 

“It’s best if you can find him an omega. We tried all the medication, but he’s not responding. He’s in a lot of pain.” 

Yuuri felt guilt wash over him. He didn’t understand how his body could cause such a reaction. Not to anyone and especially not to Victor Nikforov. 

“I… understand,” Yakov answered. 

“We can help with such arrangements,” the doctor continued. 

“Yes… yes I think that’s best.”

Yuuri felt sick. The way they were discussing Victor without the man present reminded himself of the way others spoke about him as an omega. And the thought of Victor with someone else seemed too much for him. 

He knew Victor didn’t belong to him. He knew he could never have him. But that didn’t stop him from loving the man. Sometimes he daydreamed of what it would be like with Victor, and when he realized what he was doing, would scold himself like a child. Victor had been all Yuuri could see since he was a young. An unreachable god that looked so beautiful. And then he met his god, who was nothing if not utterly human. 

And he loved that human. 

And so hearing them discuss Victor with another omega so openly made his lungs burn. He got up and left, mumbling something about coffee. 

Yurio and Yakov didn’t know what to do. 

No one did. 

\---

Victor was burning. His body ached and all he wanted was to be buried in someone’s arms. No… not someone’s… Yuuri’s! He wanted to touch and be touched. To see those brown eyes look up at him with affection.

To be so close that Yuuri’s breath would be against his skin. To be so close that he was a part of the other man. To be inside him… pushing and pushing...

He had never felt this way before. It was like something inside of him had finally awoken. It was famished and furious at being suppressed. It wanted what belonged to it. 

While his body felt heavy and sluggish, his arousal was very much awake. It wanted to be in Yuuri. Oh how he remembered the scent of Yuuri’s slick. He knew it was seeping through the other’s clothes when he had pushed him down. How warm would it have been in there? How tight? Would Yuuri have melted to his touch? Could he have made Yuuri feel the same? 

Oh the thought! 

Licking every bit of that creamy skin. Ravishing and watching Yuuri crumble under him. Wanting Victor. Yearning for Victor. He would suck the other’s collar bone. Listen to the hitching of his breath. Move his mouth down to a nipple and leave hot kisses. Slip a finger inside and hear the squelch of slick give way to him. He imagined Yuuri fucking himself on his fingers. Wanting nothing more than Victor. He would draw it out… bring the brunette to sobs. He would take that slick and spread it against his length. Line up against Yuuri’s desperate entrance. Push against it. Feel it give way. And then he would thrust in. 

Hot… wet… So close…

Victor’s eyes snapped open. He felt the weight of someone’s body on him and it was wrong. He looked down to see a someone touching him. Using their mouth. Swallowing him and bobbing their head up and down. 

He wanted to cum. He wanted it more than anything. And this throat was warm and skilled. The pleasure pulsed through him. He was so close… so close to being satisfied. 

But whoever this person was… it was not Yuuri. And that alone made waves of nausea lurch to the back of his throat. He quickly sat up from the bed he was in. The other person was startled and released Victor. A trail of saliva dangling from their mouth to Victor’s arousal. 

It was a man. Brunette with brown eyes. And an omega. But it was not his brown eyed omega. 

He growled and pushed the other away. He felt filthy and wanted to weep. He wanted to crawl into Yuuri and never leave. 

“I… I…” the other stammered. “They asked me to… You’re in a rut.”

The other was clearly affected by Victor’s pheromones. The alpha in him could smell their slick. But it was too sweet. Too overbearing. It was nothing like Yuuri’s aroma which was comforting, like a breath of fresh air for the first time in ages. 

“Please leave.”

“I can help you… please let me help you.” 

Victor saw hunger in those eyes. Smelled the desire. But he wanted none of it. 

The nameless omega reached out to touch him. 

A snarl broke out of his mouth. Victor had never felt his own body rumble with sound like this before.

Desire changed to fear. The omega quickly got up and ran out of the room. 

Victor leaned back down, whimpering at the pulses of need that paired with each beat of his heart. 

\--- 

Yuuri wanted to leave. But he couldn’t imagine going home to the apartment he shared with Victor, knowing that it would be empty. That he would be there alone while another person was with Victor. 

Yurio had left. And now he was stuck alone with Yakov, waiting for Victor. He hated how he felt. How the silence seemed to itch uncomfortably at his anxiety. 

“Yuuri…” Yakov finally caved in. “I wish you had told me.” The guilt crushed Yuuri. “I wouldn’t have thought less of you, if that’s why you did it.” He couldn’t look at Yakov. “I need to understand as your coach…”

“I just… I just wanted to skate.” He grabbed his hair awkwardly in frustration. “For the first time… I felt like I could just be… me. Katsuki Yuuri. Not... omega Yuuri.” He felt sobs welling in the back of his throat. His face burned as he held back tears. 

“Yuuri…”

They were interrupted as an omega burst into the room. He could smell Victor’s pheromones on him. It smelled like a rainfall and bergamot. His heart pounded and he wanted to push the other down and tear that scent off them and onto himself.

“That was quick…” Yakov murmured. 

“I couldn’t… he… he wouldn’t.” The omega was terrified. Trembling and gasping. 

“I don’t understand.”

“He made me leave. He growled… I couldn’t….” 

And Yuuri felt his heart swell with relief. 

“This doesn’t make sense!” Yakov pushed past the other and headed towards Victor’s hospital room. 

\---

“Victor!” Yakov barged in. 

The silver haired alpha was sulking in his bed, cradling his arm that he had bitten earlier in the day. 

“What are you doing? Let that omega come in…”

“No.”

“What?”

“I said no.”

“Look at you! You’re like a pathetic teenaged alpha quivering after a whiff of omega tail. You need this! Think about your health, Victor. Think about what you’re doing to everyone else. Yuuri is in the waiting room worried sick! He refuses to go back to your apartment.”

At the mention Yuuri’s name he looked up. Yuuri was here? His Yuuri? His spirits rose up.

“This is a mess Victor. You need to fix your rut. We can’t afford this. Not when we’re so close to the start of the season. I can’t have you attacking Yuuri.”

And his spirits quickly sank back down. That’s right. He had pushed Yuuri down. He had smelled the Japanese man’s fear but still pressed on. 

And oh heavens, what did he think right now?! Did he know that another omega had been in here? Been on him? 

“Are you listening to me?” 

“How’s Yuuri?” 

“What… how can you ask that now when you’re in such a shape?”

“Please… is he ok?” 

“He’s fine… Just shaken up. You didn’t hurt him Victor. Scared him yes… but,” Yakov gestured to the wound on Viktor’s right arm. “You didn’t mark him. It’s alright.” 

It didn’t lessen his guilt. 

“You need to fix your rut, Victor. Let me call back that omega.”

“NO!” he growled. 

“I don’t understand. You’re about to burst, just let him take care of you.” 

“I don’t want it.”

“Think of your body, Victor. I can have them bring you another omega.”

“NO! I don’t want anyone but Yuuri!” he hissed. And once the words left his mouth, he felt their weight. 

“Victor… you can’t ask this of him. He won’t be able to say no if you command it.”

“Let me see him.”

“So you can pounce on him?”

“I won’t…. I just need to see him, Yakov. I need to talk to him.”

“And do what? Convince him into your bed?”

“No… I just… please… I won’t do anything. I promise,” he begged. 

He had never seen Viktor so desperate. So wounded and needy. 

“I’lll… I’ll see what I can do… ”

\--- 

Yakov walked back into the room. Yuuri stood up. 

“Is he… okay?” 

“He wants to talk to you.” 

Yuuri’s face went red. 

“But… but he’s… he’s…” 

“He’s desperate Yuuri. It’s like he’s pining. Just talk to him, nothing more. I won’t let anything else happen, Yuuri. I promise. He promised” 

Yuuri wanted to do anything to help Victor. Anything to keep that other omega away from him. But he was scared. The way his own body had acted to Victor was foreign to him. He already felt such strong emotions for the Russian. Already loved him. He couldn’t bear more on his heart. 

But he had resolved to do what he could. 

“Alright.”

\---

Yakov walked into Victor’s room.

“Where’s Yuuri?” he whimpered. 

His coach walked closer to him and put his hands on his shoulder.

“I’m going to hold you back, alright Victor?” 

“What are you…?”

“Victor?”

It was Yuuri’s voice from behind the door. Victor shot up, but Yakov was firm. He tried to push back. To slam open that door and drag Yuuri into the bed. He felt his rut intensify despite the fact that he couldn’t even smell Yuuri. The haze of desire rising.

“Yakov, let me go…” he growled. 

“No… remember what you promised me, Vitya. You said you wouldn’t do anything.”

It became a struggle between the two men. He just wanted Yuuri. Only Yuuri. Why couldn’t Yakov see that? Why was he standing between him and his omega? 

“Are you alright?” Yuuri’s voice dripped with worry. Of self doubt and anxiety. Victor hated that he made Yuuri sound like that. It brought back some of his control.

“Yuuri…” his voice was so dark with desire that Victor felt embarrassed. He tried again. “Yuuri, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s alright, Victor. I’m sorry. I should have told you.” He could hear Yuuri berate himself. He was still hurting Yuuri. 

“Oh Yuuri, no…” he fought back another wave of need. 

“Is… is your arm ok?” 

“... What?” 

“You… you bit your arm instead… Thank you for that.” 

He vaguely remember that. Yuuri’s neck had been so soft. It smelled so enticing. Victor groaned as he became even harder with the memory. But he also remember Yuuri’s resistance. Remembered him pleading. He couldn’t hurt Yuuri… no matter what the alpha inside him said. 

“It’s fine, Yuuri. I’m sorry… I must have scared you. Are you alright?” He just wanted to hear Yuuri’s voice more. Wanted to hear his soft tone reassure him. Hear him laugh. Hear him gasp. Hear him moan… 

“I’m alright… Listen, Victor. This… this isn’t healthy. Yakov told me you refused the… the help.” 

Victor felt sick. Did Yuuri want him to be with someone else? He started trembling and resisting Yakov more. 

“I don’t want that omega.” Victor felt like his chest was a massive bruise. What was Yuuri trying to say? 

“The doctor said he can find you one you prefer.” Yuuri didn’t sound convincing. 

“Yuuri… I don’t want another omega,” he sobbed. 

“Vitya,” Yakov tried to interject. 

“No… please, just leave me alone.” Victor buried his hands into his silver hair, tugging in shame, desire, and disappointment. 

“Victor?” Yuuri couldn’t see what was happening behind the door, but the Russian’s voice was so frail. It wounded him. 

“I’m fine…” No that wasn’t true. “I’ll be fine.” Victor sank deep into his hospital bed. “I can do this… so please go home. Both of you.”

“But… your body!” Yakov tried to explain.

“I’ll endure. I don’t want any other omega.”

“Victor?” Yuuri’s voice tore at him. 

“Please… leave.”


	2. The Yearning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the encouraging words! It really made me excited to write more. Thanks so much! This chapter is a bit slower but because that was just how things seemed to flow. 
> 
> In this version of the Omegaverse, there are no fated mates. I somehow find it more romantic that these two would react to one another because they love each other so much. That this goes beyond biology and is rather a story of two hearts trying to find one another. That's why no one is coming to the conclusion of fated pairs in the story. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy the continuation of this story.

Victor buried his face into the hospital pillow. It smelled sterile and frustrated him. He wanted to be surrounded by nothing but the smell of Yuuri. To be wrapped in those slender arms. Those strong legs snaking around his waist. Torso against torso. Not even fucking. Just being held. Being wanted. 

Victor growled. He wasn’t helping his rut. Imagining Yuuri’s body made his arousal come back with a force. Guiltily he reached down to his length. 

He felt like he was betraying Yuuri. All the lewd things he had done to the omega’s body in his thoughts. He liked to imagine Yuuri sprawled out for him back in the Hasetsu springs, the place where he had seen Yuuri’s body completely bare. Legs held open by small, trembling hands. Slick glistening from Yuuri’s hole. 

He liked to think about rocking against him... into him. He could imagine the warm water splashing around them as he thrusted into Yuuri. It would pale in comparison to how warm Yuuri would be inside. How warm and perfect a fit. Fingers would sink into those round curves. Slick would slide down Yuuri’s supple thighs as he would piston in and out, hitting Yuuri where it felt good. 

Victor was obsessed with the thought of making Yuuri tremble with an orgasm. He wanted Yuuri to feel the same. Wanted Yuuri to want him back. 

He could see it when he closed his eyes. Yuuri’s mouth parted and breathing heavily, trying not to make a sound. But those lips would betray him as whimpers and soft words of encouragement would spill out. His dark eyebrows would be furrowed slightly, as he would be so close. Victor would kiss Yuuri’s thick lashes and then wait for them to open and show a glazed and satisfied brown.

In. Out. 

And finally, Yuuri would moan his name a climax. His body quivering. 

“Victor.”

He came hard into his hands. He found himself back in this stale hospital room and not in the onsen. His climax was empty and unsatisfying, but helped clear his head. 

The nurses had left him plenty of towels and napkins to clean off with. 

After arguing with Yakov, he had convinced both him and Yuuri to return home, leaving him alone in the hospital. It had been a long and painful night, thrusting into his own hand, barely taking the edge off. At first he had resisted thinking of Yuuri, but his self control was weak. 

Since Victor had met Yuuri, the Japanese man was all he wanted. He was dazzling and made Victor’s world brighter. But now, his alpha was in agreement. It yearned for Yuuri like a wounded animal. It took all of Victor’s willpower to not to leave the hospital and go to their shared apartment where he would take the omega as his own. 

But he remembered the way Yuuri’s voice sounded from behind his hospital door. How it rasped with hurt and confusion. Victor was incredibly disappointed that Yakov refused to let him at least see Yuuri before he left. And it wasn’t because he was filled with so much lust. He wanted to look into those earthy brown eyes and find reassurance. To find forgiveness. 

Again, the thought of Yuuri made Victor’s arousal return full force. He was tired of using his hands. His body hurt more with each round. 

“Yuuri,” escaped his mouth in a sob. 

\---

Yurio and Yakov visited the following evening, once Victor’s rut was calmer. The Russian felt awkward, having to hide his half arousal under his blankets, but having the company of the young alpha and older beta helped get his mind off of his insatiable desire. 

At first they talked about practice. Yuri boasted about the number of spins he made successfully and teased about how he was going to win gold again with Victor stuck in the hospital. It felt good to make light of his rut, so he chuckled along. It made the weight of what was happening to him lessen. They also mentioned some of Georgi’s over the top antics and Mila’s attempts at lifting Yuri off the ground. It was pleasant.

But it was also becoming painfully apparent to Victor how they avoided any mention of Yuuri. Victor tried to pry out how the other man was doing. Did he practice with them today? How was his demeanor? Was he angry with Victor? Where was he? Why wasn’t he here with him?

“How’s Makkachin?”

“He’s doing fine. Misses you, apparently. Yuuri said he slept next to him all of last night.” Yurio answered while nonchalantly looking through his phone. 

Ah… there it was. His breath quickened and he leaned forwards, trying to avoid rustling his arousal.

Yakov sent Yuri a scathing glare and the teen sent back a nervous shrug. 

“And… and Yuuri?” the omega’s name left his lips like velvet

Victor’s heart was racing. He had to know. 

“He’s fine.” Yakov was short.

“Did he practice his salchow?” Please just talk about him.

“Yes.” 

“How many did he land? Did he try it with a raised arm this time?” 

“Victor… I know what you’re trying to do.” 

“How is he?” he whined at his coach. “Please,” he added desperately. 

“He was quiet,” was all Yakov was willing to say. 

“The piglet wouldn’t look us in the face,” Yurio was tired of dancing around the topic. “I can tell he thinks we see him differently,” he angrily tossed his phone into his bag. “He should have told us he was an omega…” he added softer now but not void of anger.

And finally Victor asked it himself. Why hadn’t Yuuri told him? But then again… Victor had never told Yuuri that he was an alpha either. Of course it was obvious what Victor was. It was evident in the way he held his posture. In the way his scent permeated the space around him even when he had it under check. 

Why should Yuuri have to say it when he didn’t? Why did Yuuri have to endure everything on his own? What hardships had he faced all by himself? The weight of it all made Victor want to weep.

A knock came at the door. 

Yakov stood up and opened it, mumbled a thank you to whoever it was in the hall. When he closed it, there was a bag in his hands. 

“This is for you,” he tossed it on the bed. 

Confused, Victor opened it to find clothes, blankets, and food that he liked. Things that belonged to Victor and brought him comfort. 

“What?”

“He packed those for you.” Victor was still confused. “Yuuri thought you would feel better with some familiar things.” 

Oh his sweet Yuuri! Viktor pulled out the blanket and brought it close to his face, taking a deep breath. Disappointed, he could only smell himself. But he could imagine the omega tenderly packing him clothes that made Victor feel at home and that brought him such comfort. He could see those soft hands tucking and folding his favorite blanket. Finding room to sneak him snacks. Oh, why didn’t any of it smell like him?

“Was that… is he here?” it dawned on him who was the person that knocked on the door. 

Yurio and Yakov gave eachother a glance. 

“Can… Can I see him?” the haze was coming coming back, slowly blinding him to reason. The desperation that was just being near Yuuri was like burning thirst.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Vitya.”

“Please… my rut is much better. It’s almost gone!” The last part was a lie, but he hadn’t seen Yuuri since the omega was shaking with fear under him. He didn’t want that to be the last image of Yuuri in his mind. And he absolutely didn’t want Yuuri to remember Victor so consumed by his arousal. So irrational and dominating. 

“I can smell it on you, old man. You’re dripping with lust for Yuuri at the mention of his name. What are you gonna do? Attack him again?” Yuri wasn’t helping. 

“I didn’t attack…” Oh but he had. “I didn’t mean to…” Victor buried his face in his hands out of shame. 

“And you don’t mean to now… But Vitya, I’ve never seen anyone react like that before. Let alone you,” Yakov was being completely earnest. And to be honest, he didn’t understand what had happened. 

Even the doctor struggled to explain it. Yuuri wasn’t in heat. Even having sweated so much, his scent would have been faint with Yuuri’s disciplined regiment of scent blockers. Even when off suppressants, Yuuri managed his diet in a way to dull his scent. This wasn’t just biological. It was something more.

“Does he hate me…?” 

Both Yakov and Yuri were stunned at the question. At how raw Victor’s voice was. 

Yuuri could feel a lot of things. But hate for Victor was not one of them. They had seen the Japanese man blame himself for all of this. Seen how the very same question that Victor had just posed passed across Yuuri’s face during today’s practice. 

“Of course not, Vitya. But this is for the best.”

Victor understood that on one level. But on another level, his arousal was coming back and his inner alpha was unforgiving that these two would keep him away from his sweet Yuuri. It was seething with thick desire and anger. Why were they keeping Yuuri away? Why were they being so selfish? 

Were they… were they going to take Yuuri away from him? 

The thought of their hands–anyone’s hands–on Yuuri blinded him. He could see it. Yuuri’s thin wrists being pinned down by someone who wasn’t him. Yuuri’s soft features being stained pink from embarrassment and fear… just like they had with Victor towering over him. His Yuuri weeping as hands that were not Victor’s slipped into his shirt. A snarl ripped through his throat. 

Yurio, despite being a young alpha smelled the shift in Victor’s pheromones. He felt his skin prickle and his eyes sting. Yakov, being a beta, noticed it too late. Victor’s eyes were dilated to the point there was almost not blue left. 

Victor lunged at the door. The bland blankets fell to the floor. His hand gripped the knob and he was about to turn and pull when hands grabbed him and dragged him back to the bed. 

He growled and lashed out with his fists. None of which landed because his was dizzy with arousal. His rut had come back full force. His body felt so heavy and his skin ached.

Yakov barked orders to Yuri to find help. He struggled with his coach, trying his best to overpower the older man. But his body was already waning from his strong rut that had already lasted too long. He was dehydrated and just so broken from desire. 

“Let me see Yuuri! Let me see my omega!” He was shouting things that would normally have embarrassed him and how bold they were. “He’s my… my omega. I need him… He needs me!”

There was a sudden burn in arm. He looked up to see a nurse with a needle in her hand. Everything started to blur together. His voice seemed miles away. 

“Yuuri… I need… Yuuri…”

\---

Yuuri saw Yurio walk into the waiting room. His hair was disheveled and he was short of breath. 

“Is everything alright?” Yuuri stood up to see if the blond was hurt. Something about his demeanor made him seem wounded. 

“Don’t touch me,” Yuri hissed. The words seemed to burn Yuuri. He backed off and sat back down. 

They sat in silence for a while, waiting for Yakov. 

“Is… is Victor ok?” Yuuri gathered the courage to ask. 

“He’s a wreck.” Yurio huffed, feeling guilty at having snapped at Yuuri earlier. 

“Oh…” A heavy pause. “Did the bag help?”

“I guess so… It made him happy.” 

That was enough to make Yuuri smile. 

Yakov walked in. He was red in the face and there were scratches on him. He seemed angry and frustrated. 

“Yakov, are you ok?” 

“That stupid boy!” he grumbled. “Acting like a dog! I’ve never seen anything like it! The Victor Nikiforov acting like… such a fool!” 

Yuuri knew now wasn’t the best time but he still asked. 

“Do you think I can see him?” 

“What?!” Both Yakov and Yuri snapped at him. 

“I’m using suppressants again. I made sure to use all the different kinds of scent blockers I have. I promise he won’t smell anything.”

“Why would you want to see him?” Yuri was flabbergasted. Did he want Victor to charge at him? 

“I… I have heats regularly,” Yuuri felt embarrassed saying it out loud. “A rut can’t be any different. If this is his first time, it could be scary… I just thought maybe I could help.”

“Help by what? Letting him fuck you?” 

The omega turned bright red. The comment stung his pride but he decided to let it slide. 

“I just… wanted to see him. And tell him I’m ok… that he’s going to be ok. That Makkachin misses him.” 

“Tell him that when he’s not humping everything.” Yurio couldn’t understand. 

“Please, Yakov.”

The coach sighed. These two were so wrapped up in each other that he thought they were such a perfect match. 

“He’s sedated right now.”

“What? Why?” Worry spilled from his voice.

“He tried to run out of his room.”

“Can I… still see him?” 

“He can’t do anything asleep, so I don’t see why not.” Yakov caved.

\---

Yuuri carefully pried open the door. He peeked in and saw Victor’s form on his bed, unmoving. Yakov was close behind him. Building courage, he stepped in. 

The room smelled of rain and bergamot. It was made richer by Victor’s rut. But there was a bitter sting of pain. Like the bergamot of oversteeped tea. Yuuri already felt his body reacting despite being on suppressants. Something that was absolutely foreign to him.

He gasped when he saw Victor’s face up close. The Russian’s brows were creased angrily in his sleep. His skin had lost its usual healthy glow and was replaced with a dull pallor. 

But he was still beautiful. Silver hair framing his strong face. Long lashes quivering from whatever it was Victor dreamed of. Victor always looked as if he was made of starlight. And even now under the unflattering hospital lights and with his fading complexion, he was the most stunning being Yuuri had seen. 

Even though he was sedated, Victor’s hands were balled into tight fists. He seemed to be straining against his rut even in his sleep. Yuuri did everything he could to not look at the alpha’s blatant arousal peeking through the sheets. Instead he focused on the man’s face. 

He didn’t like how Victor’s face was contorted in discomfort. Yuuri gently reached out to Victor’s face. 

“Yuuri…” Yakov warned. 

But Yuuri felt safe. Not because Victor was asleep. But because despite everything, he hadn’t hurt Yuuri. That much was evident from the bite sized wound on Victor’s arm from where the alpha chose to hurt himself instead of marking Yuuri against his will.

Softly he placed a finger on Victor’s forehead. The man’s skin was burning hot but still felt clammy to the touch. Yuuri felt guilty. 

How had he done this? It didn’t make sense. None of this did. Yes he was an omega, but he saw himself as the dullest omega. Nothing that would capture Victor’s interest.

He slowly massaged the skin until the crease in the man’s brows faded away. Victor’s body softened. He leaned into Yuuri’s touch. A happy sigh passed through the alpha’s lips. 

Yuuri could feel his slick build slowly.

“Yuuri,” Yakov warned once more. 

“Just let me put his blanket on him. Ruts and heats raise body temperature so everything else seems cold. Kind of like a fever…” Yuuri tenderly brushed Victor’s damp bangs from his face and finally pulled away. 

Victor whimpered and it tore at Yuuri. 

Yuuri carefully placed the blanket he had packed for Victor on the sleeping alpha’s body. Yakov watched how affectionately the omega patted down the blanket, making sure Victor was completely covered. It was heart warming.

Already Victor looked a bit better. Softer and more at ease. Yuuri wished he could stay. And not because Victor’s alpha pheromones seemed to be desperately reaching out to Yuuri or because slick was sliding down his inner thighs. But because Victor looked somehow restful in this moment. And Yuuri wanted to be there was Victor opened his eyes. To tell him it would be alright. To get reassurance for himself that they were still friends.

Ever since Yuuri had walked into their empty apartment, he was full of self doubt. Would Victor want to be near him? Knowing what Yuuri had hidden from him? Knowing what Yuuri’s body had done to him? 

Was everything going to fall apart?

“I’m so sorry Victor…”

“Yuuri… we should go before Victor wakes up.” 

“Right…” Yuuri gave one last look at Victor’s face. Every bit of distance that he created between himself and Victor hurt him. It was a palpable longing he felt in his chest. The man he loved more than anything was so wounded because of him. He wanted to have Victor’s large hands on his face. To have those blue eyes close and that mouth tell him it was alright. That they would overcome all these odds. 

But Yuuri found himself daydreaming again of a closeness with Victor he would never have. He berated himself and he left the hospital room with Yakov. 

\---

Victor had such a pleasant dream. Yuuri was with him. Beside him! The omega’s eyes were so full of love in that dream. So caring and affectionate. 

Even though Victor had attacked Yuuri, the Yuuri in his dream touched him. Gently caressed his face and even let the alpha soften into that touch. He missed Yuuri so much. They had always been beside one another since Victor went to Hasetsu. This was the longest he had gone since seeing him. It only made sense to Victor that he would dream of Yuuri. A Yuuri he could never have. 

But even in his dream, Yuuri was wounded. With all those soft touches of tenderness, Yuuri had left. But not before uttering “I’m so sorry Victor…”

Sorry for what? What were you apologizing for Yuuri? Why are you leaving? Will you come back? 

Victor reached out to chase Yuuri, but found himself waking up alone in his hospital room, his IVs tugging at him painfully. He glanced at the clock seeing it was early morning. 

His body felt like lead and his head throbbed. His arousal between his legs was stiff and uncomfortable, but Victor was so tired of tending to it. He sat up and noticed someone had placed his blanket from home on top of him. 

Was it a nurse? Or did Yakov do it? That seemed out of character for the coach. 

Victor couldn’t dwell on the question for too long. Another wave of desire passed through him as his rut couldn’t be ignored anymore. His mouth was dry and this time he felt nausea creep in the back of throat. 

How much longer did he have to endure?

\---

Yuuri was alone in their apartment. He couldn’t sleep, so instead he watched the light turn from dark to lilac as the sun rose. 

Makkachin was curled up against him. He had missed his owner, but even more so, missed the atmosphere of the home when both Yuuri and Victor were together. He clung onto the Japanese man for both his own comfort and also sensing how distraught his owner’s human was. 

Yuuri was unaware to Makkachin’s reasoning but welcomed the warmth. It made him feel guilty, imagining Victor in the cold confines of his hospital room. 

His knew what the betrayal of the body felt like in a heat. How his skin hurt and his body only wanted to be filled to the brim with alpha. He had spent all of his alone, but not without taking precautions. He still found it embarrassing and degrading to fuck himself on his fingers until he simply couldn’t move from the exhaustion of his body. Putting Victor into a rut was surely just as painful for the alpha. 

Yuuri felt tears build up at the edges of his eyes. He sniffled as he tried to choke down his tears. Makkachin nudged Yuuri, waking up to the omega’s distress. 

It was too much… All of this was too much and Yuuri just wanted to have Victor beside him again.

Beside him and smiling with his large grin. His voice getting high pitched when Yuuri wouldn’t immediately give in to his whims. Those arms wrapping around him from behind, always staying close. Blue eyes glistening in excitement. The way Victor kept him grounded… 

Yuuri wished he could do the same for Victor right now. 

He held onto Makkachin tighter and felt guilty as he his tears wet the poodle’s fur. 

How much longer did they need to be apart?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Victor and Yuuri aren't quite in the right mindset to meet yet. Or at least, not when they are both conscious. Next chapter though, they'll get to meet once Victor's allowed to leave the hospital. 
> 
> It means so much to me that you are willing to read my silly take of these two goofballs' romance.


	3. The Distance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!
> 
> Thanks for all the comments! I was so excited to write again after reading them. 
> 
> In this chapter, Victor and Yuuri finally meet face to face! 
> 
> It might not be what you were hoping for. There's still some hurdles left for these two lovebirds. But there definitely is some more explanations of my version of the Omegaverse. And we see our two favorite love sick skaters try to maneuver what being an alpha and omega really means. 
> 
> Please enjoy!

Time blurred together for Victor until it was his third day in the hospital. The doctors were finally willing to release him, saying his rut was almost over and the worst of it had passed. His body just needed to recover. He hadn’t eaten anything except for the few things Yuuri had packed for him. But keeping them down was difficult. He felt heavy and skin was painfully sensitive to the touch. 

Victor was thrilled to finally be allowed to go home. To see Yuuri and talk to him. They had never been separated this long and all he wanted was to grab Yuuri and hold tight. Not sensually. Not even after all the things he had imagined doing with Yuuri’s body. He just wanted to be close to Yuuri. To reaffirm who they were. 

But Yakov arrived to pick him up instead with news that was far from ideal. They were in Yakov’s car when the old beta explained.

“I’ve asked Yuuri to stay with Yurio for a few days.” Victor blanched. The only thing that allowed him to endure his days in the hospital was the thought that he would see Yuuri at the end. 

“Yakov,” Victor whined his hands trembling. “My rut is over. Please just let me see Yuuri.” 

“I don’t think it’s a good idea Victor. You’re at the tail end of your rut and I don’t want any more setbacks in your practice. It’s best if the two of you have space.” 

“We’ve had more than enough space.” There was still just the slightest fog left from his rut. It clouded his thoughts with his inner alpha’s desires. 

“Victor, what if you attack him again?” The guilt came washed over him again. He could remember Yuuri’s panic so clearly. And what made it worst was how he replayed it over and over again while stroking himself in his rut’s haze. He imagined what would have happened if there was no one to hold him back. How his teeth would have sunk into Yuuri’s soft, unclaimed throat. He would have continued marking anywhere his mouth could reach. Yuuri’s shoulders. His dusty rose nipples. The inside of his thighs soaked with slick. His alpha wanted to take Yuuri. And shamefully… so did Victor. 

“I wouldn’t… He means so much to me, Yakov. You know that.” 

“Yuuri didn’t want to leave either but I told him it was for your best and he listened. Now Victor, I need you to think about what’s best for Yuuri.”

“Yurio’s also an alpha. What makes you think that’s better for Yuuri?” Victor felt petty and childish saying those words. But he was trying to bargain his way into having Yuuri back to himself. And there was truth in those words. He couldn’t stand the thought of Yuuri near anyone, let alone another alpha. Even if it was Yurio. 

And what if Yuuri loved someone that wasn’t Victor? What if they sunk their teeth into what was his? He tried his best to fight down his alpha’s panic. It was a thick bile in the back of his throat. Congealed from his raw fear and sheer longing. 

He trusted Yuuri. He wanted Yuuri to be happy. 

But he was also famished for the man and wanted to kiss every bit of his flesh, leaving trails of himself behind. 

“Yuri’s just a child!” Yakov scoffed with disbelief. 

“I… I know. I’m sorry. I just… miss him.”

“You’ll see him tomorrow at practice, Vitya.”

The car came to a halt and they were at Victor’s apartment. He got out of the car, sulking that Yuuri wasn’t inside their home.

“Vitya,” his coach called before he closed the door. “Yuuri misses you too.” It was uncharacteristically kind of his coach to say that. And it was all Victor needed to carry on. 

\---

When Victor opened the door, Makkachin leapt onto him with excitement. It made his body ache more, but he welcomed the poodle with open arms and just held onto him. 

“Thank you, Makkachin. I missed you,” he scratched his companion’s head. When Makkachin was finally satisfied, Victor walked into the space he shared with Yuuri. He looked around and found small signs that the Japanese man had been here. They were small, but monumental for Victor. 

Yuuri’s slippers were beside the door. His blanket folded neatly on the couch. A book he had been reading left on the kitchen table. He walked up to Yuuri’s blanket and lifted it to his face, breathing deeply. But there was no scent. 

How had Victor never noticed the absence of a smell from Yuuri? That in of itself should have been so telling. It still brought him comfort that this was something Yuuri would wrap himself in so he continued to hold onto the blanket as he walked to the kitchen. 

He found a note on the fridge in Yuuri’s handwriting. 

“Welcome home, Victor! I’m sorry I couldn’t be there to say it in person. I hope you’re feeling alright. I made you some food in the fridge. Don’t feel like you need to eat it if you don’t like it! But try to eat something. Drink plenty of water and rest up! I’ll see you tomorrow! -Yuuri”

There was a small drawing of a poodle on the corner of the note. Victor found it so endearing.

He opened the fridge to see it stocked full of food. There were both Japanese and Russian meals carefully packed in tupperware. 

He took what he suspected to be katsudon out and heated it. It tasted as best as it could with the ingredients that Yuuri had to make do with in St. Petersburg. These past few days, he had barely managed to keep any food down. But this was something Yuuri had made him. It seemed that his own alpha knew that too and Victor ate his whole meal, but not without wishing Yuuri was with him.

He wanted to see those brown eyes sparkle. To see those pink lips laugh at whatever antic that Victor was up to. To look at him with affection. 

“I love, Yuuri…” he whispered to no one. 

And it was the first time he admitted it out loud. The weight of his words pressed down onto his weary body. Tears uncontrollably spilling from his blue eyes, but he was too tired to wipe them away. 

“I love him.” He crumpled into himself, with Makkachin whining nervously beside him. 

\---

Victor arrived late to practice. His body was still sluggish but the rut had lifted. He could breathe and think again. 

Everyone was already on the ice. He could see Yurio and Mila talking to one side. Georgi was discussing something with Yakov on the other. He got closer. 

And then finally, there was Yuuri. For a moment he forgot to breathe. 

Yuuri was beautiful. His glasses were off and his bangs were damp from sweat. There was music in his motions. He moved gracefully but also solemnly, almost as if there was yearning in all his motions. Victor wanted to reach out and hold Yuuri’s outstretched hands and answer that yearning with himself. To kiss those fingertips and move beside him.

That was his place. Next to Yuuri. 

Victor rushed to get on the ice. He tossed his shoes aside and he was certain he didn’t tighten his skates nearly enough. But he wanted to be near Yuuri. 

He got on the ice and watched Yuuri start a mohawk, with his feet perfectly in line. From there he leaned to the outside his blade. Ah, a salchow, Victor realized. Yuuri effortlessly pushed off and leaped into the air, spinning perfectly. Now he just had to land. 

But something went awry. Yuuri landed perfectly on the outside edge of his blade, but his leg seemed to crumple under the weight of his body. He crashed hard onto his shoulders with the sound of his blades scraping violently against the ice. 

Victor skated as fast as he could, but Yurio and Yakov were already there beside him. 

“Yuuri, are you alright?” the coach asked. 

Victor finally reached them. Yuuri looked dazed. His eyes couldn’t focus on a single spot. He tried to prop himself up, but couldn’t find his center of gravity. 

“What’s wrong with you? It wasn’t that bad of a fall.” Yurio strived to be harsh, but instead there was worry in his voice. 

“I’m sorry, I’m dizzy. This… this is my fault.” Yuuri sounded faint. 

It hurt Victor’s heart and words failed to leave his mouth. His stood there, stunned with worry. Yuuri didn’t notice him, his focus failing. 

Yuuri stood up only to collapse again. This time Yurio was there to catch him. It bothered Victor how the younger alpha’s hands wrapped around Yuuri’s waist so snugly. But he was relieved no more harm came to the Japanese man. 

“Do we need to take you to the hospital?” Yakov took Yuuri’s arm and placed it over his shoulder. The alpha and beta steadied Yuuri, moving him off the ice. 

“No… no this is vertigo from my suppressants.” Yuuri’s body sank like a dead weight as the world started to spin. “I was suppose to be off them but…” Yuuri let that sentence trail off unfinished. They all knew why Yuuri had resumed.

Yurio sent Victor a scathing glare, blaming him for this. 

They managed to drag Yuuri off the ice. Victor was close behind like a wounded puppy.

Mila walked up to Yuuri with a towel and water. 

“Yuuri, are you going to be ok?” she asked.

“Yes… yes, I just need to stop taking my suppressants.” Yuuri flashed a smile, but there was worry in the way his brows creased his forehead. His normally creamy skin was pale. 

“What do you mean?” She was a beta and simply didn’t know. “Aren’t suppressants suppose to help?” Just like everyone else, she had learned Yuuri to be an omega only days ago. All she had known of omegas was what she was told. That they had to take medication and everything would be fine. 

“Omegas can only use suppressants for so long until it builds up in the blood. The liver can’t keep up and the side effects start. First comes the vertigo, then the thickening of the blood and vomiting. But we’re suppose to stop and do a cleanse before that happens. Before our organs shut down.” Yuuri tried to sit up to look Mila in the eyes, but there were too many Mila’s for his eyes to focus. The rink was spinning. 

“I don’t understand.”

“We poison our bodies so they don’t function the way they are suppose to.” Yuuri had intended for that to be a joke, but the statement just sat heavily in the air. “Mila, could you hand me that waste basket?” Yuuri sounded even more distant. 

“Sure.”

As soon as he had it in his hands, he was retching into it. His small frame quivered and he barely managed to breathe as his body rejected its contents. 

“You did that this morning. You should have listened to me when I told you to stay home,” Yurio was now beside him. Victor felt jealousy burn his skin. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think it would build up in my blood so soon.” 

Victor watched as now only stomach acid was leaving the omega’s body. 

He moved to say something. To take away Yuuri’s pain even if he didn’t know how. Yakov stood in his way and solemnly shook his head. He used his body was a wall between Victor and Yuuri.

He knew this was all his fault. Yuuri would have been fine if Victor hadn’t pounced on him like a beast. He was so ashamed. Victor had always prided himself on his self control as an alpha. And honestly, he had never cared for secondary genders to the point of indifference. He had never done this to an omega, let alone Yuuri. 

“We’re taking you to the hospital,” Yakov stated. 

“No! No I’ll be fine! I’ll stop the suppressants. I’ll use more scent blockers! It’s alright!” Yuuri was desperate. He just wanted to skate. To move on from everyone’s concern for him as an omega. They were all treating him like a broken thing. 

“Yuuri…”

“It’s fine… really! I’ve been through this before.” He tried to smile, but his stomach churned again. When the wave of nausea passed he said: “They’ll just tell me to find an alpha to mate with,” bitterly, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. 

Victor felt a chill seep into the base of his stomach. He hated that thought. 

Someone might have seen Yuuri as frail in that moment. But Victor didn’t. Yuuri was fighting so hard against something that so obviously scared him. And that was strength to Victor. Standing so firmly against the hand he had been dealt with and knowing fully what it all meant. Continuing to press on even though he was so scared.

Yuuri was resilient. 

Yuuri was beautiful.

And Victor wanted to tell him that. He wanted to take the burden from him. And if he couldn’t do that, he wanted to be a pillar for Yuuri to lean on. To lift Yuuri high above.

“Yuuri…” the other’s name finally escaped his mouth. It was full of worry but mostly spilling to the brim with longing.

Yuuri’s body stiffened. Victor couldn’t help but feel hurt, even though he completely understood why Yuuri would be afraid of him. The last time they were in the same room together, he had pounced on Yuuri. Was he afraid Victor was going to do the same again? Didn’t he trust him?

“Victor… I’m sorry, I didn’t see you. Are you alright?” Yuuri tried to focus his eyes on where Victor was standing but his vertigo persisted. 

Victor heard the genuine concern in his voice. But all he wanted was for Yuuri to say his name again. 

“I’m alright, Yuuri.” Victor pushed past Yakov who scowled at him. He knelt next to Yuuri. “How are you?”

“Ha ha… there’s three Victors,” Yuuri laughed as he tried to keep his head up straight. That sound brought a smile to Victor’s mouth. The first one in so many days. 

Victor was very careful with his motions. He kept them slow and easy to read all while making sure he wasn’t too close to Yuuri. That he wasn’t touching him even though all he wanted to do was cup Yuuri’s face with his hands.

“This is nothing,” Yuuri tried to reassure Victor. “Did you eat?” Yuuri was still more focused on Victor’s well being than his own. He knew how hard it was to eat after his body was left a wreck from a heat. Ruts were just the same. 

“Yes, you’re katsudon was delicious, thank you.” He couldn’t help but grin. He was on Yuuri’s mind even now when he was so ill. 

“Did you get to see Makkachin? He missed you…” Yuuri had wanted to say how much he missed Victor too but he grabbed the bin again and started vomiting. 

“That’s enough. Yura, take him home.” Yakov was done watching Yuuri be miserable. The omega needed rest. 

“No! It’s alright! You guys practice. I’ll be fine here. I’m sorry for disrupting practice.” 

“Yuuri…”

“I’ll be fine Yakov. Please…”

\---

“You want him to stay with Yurio again?” Victor tried not to tower over his coach. He wanted to be calm and reasonable to show them that he could be trusted around Yuuri but he found himself growing menacing in stature instead. 

“He’s going to be off suppressants, Victor. So yes.” Victor was hurt at the lack of trust.

“I’m not some sort of animal, Yakov.” He had regretted his actions since the moment he made them. Surely they saw that? He wasn’t some rabid alpha. He was Victor. 

“You just finished a rut, Vitya. You could relapse easily.”

“But you trust Yurio? You said it yourself, he’ll be off suppressants and Yurio’s just a teenager. How can you trust him more than me?” 

“Vitya, please just get on the ice. We’ll discuss this later.”

He sulked onto the rink, hating how much like a child he felt. 

\---

Yurio had his arm on Yuuri’s waist again as he propped the older man up. Victor’s eyes couldn’t leave from that spot of contact between their bodies. 

“I’m alright, Yuri. I can walk on my own.” 

“Yurio, you look like you’re going to drop him,” Victor wanted them to stop touching. Instead, the blonde’s grip got tighter. He seethed just a bit more, but he swallowed it back. 

“We’re going home, Katsudon.”

“Oh… Oh I was thinking I would...” 

“Yuuri…” Yakov gave a stern look.

Thinking? Thinking what? Victor’s hopes rose. Did Yuuri want to come home with him? He wanted to rip him out of Yurio’s arms and take him home. To their home. It was empty and meaningless without him. 

“I don’t want to bother you anymore than I have, Yurio. And your bed is too cramped,” Yuuri chuckled. “I would be able to rest better knowing I wasn’t getting in your way.”

“You weren’t! And I can take the couch tonight.”

Tonight? Had they shared a bed? Victor stiffened. He didn’t know what to do. Of course Yuuri wouldn’t have let anything happen between the two of them. Their relationship wasn’t like that and Victor knew. But it didn’t stop his alpha clawing with jealousy at his composure. 

“I’d rather go home if that’s alright?” Yuuri was looking at Yakov now. His brown eyes wide with hope. And Yakov was tired of it. Tired of keeping these two apart from one another even though it was for their own damn good. 

“Do what you want.” 

“Is that alright, Victor?” Yuuri’s gaze was on him now. And Victor didn’t quite understand at first. Why would Yuuri be asking him? Shouldn’t it be Victor on his knees begging Yuuri to come home with him? 

Yuuri was getting anxious with Victor’s long pause. 

“Oh of course, Yuuri! You don’t even have to ask!” The brunette looked relieved. Like he had been holding his breath for Victor’s answer. 

“Then… would you mind?” Yuuri reached out an arm for Victor. 

It dawned on him that Yuuri was now asking for help. Help from Victor. Yuuri was always so careful not to ask for help. He never wanted to burden others. But here he was reaching out to Victor, the man who had attacked him only days before. He was willing to trust Victor and that shook the alpha to his core.

“Not… not at all, Yuuri.” Victor swallowed as he tried to fight back his excitement. He carefully answered Yuuri’s outstretched hand with his own body, watching his own hands tremble with anticipation. Yuuri softly placed his hand on Victor’s larger shoulder and the Russian man resisted wrapping him in a tight embrace. Instead, he gently took Yuuri from Yurio and placed his arm around Yuuri’s waist. 

It felt so right. Yuuri was warm and soft. He fit perfectly against Victor and softened into his touch. It wasn’t because they were alpha and omega. Yuuri’s body smelled of nothing. It was because they were Victor and Yuuri. 

Victor bit back a sob as Yuuri was finally in his arms again. He just wished it wasn’t because Yuuri was ill. 

Victor’s touch was gentle and firm at the same time. He didn’t want his actions to be read as sexual. Not after fantasizing about Yuuri sprawled out with need for days. But he also wanted to support Yuuri. To keep him from crumbling to the ground and protect him. 

The goodbyes were awkward. Everyone worried that Yuuri shouldn’t be so close to Victor. But they couldn’t deny at how blissful Victor looked. How the man looked at ease for the first time since the whole ordeal began. How the corner’s of Yuuri’s lips were curved with a smile he tried to hide. 

“Just… just be careful,” Yurio warned. Something had happened between the two Yuris and Victor hated it. They were closer now. And he knew that Yuuri wasn’t replacing him with another alpha but it was so hard to stop himself from feeling that way. 

Yuuri just smiled and his grip on Victor tightened ever so slightly. It made Victor’s heart soar. 

They walked home mostly in silence. Every now and then Victor would ask if Yuuri was alright to continue or Yuuri would mention something about Makkachin or dinner. 

They both wanted to say something. It was evident in the heavy silences between words. 

Victor wanted to apologize to Yuuri. To ask for forgiveness and ask him to stay beside him, despite knowing the alpha could react just as poorly again regardless of his good intentions. And then there was Yuuri. Who regretted hiding his status as omega from Victor. Who wanted to ask if he could stay beside the alpha despite knowing how it wrecked Victor’s body. 

But neither of them wanted to break the sense of comfort they had. Victor didn’t know what Yuuri was thinking and neither did Yuuri know what was in Victor’s thoughts. But each of them independently knew they just wanted to be beside each other. 

That is where they felt they belonged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yakov means well when he's keeping the two of them apart. He's worried Victor will do something that he'll regret. He knows how much Victor cares for Yuuri. So he's doing his best even if that means coming off as meddlesome. 
> 
> Thanks so much for reading. It means so much to me that you would read this silly take on their romance! 
> 
> Have a delightful day!
> 
> -DazzledGhosts


	4. The Wanting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! 
> 
> Thanks so much for the encouragement! I love hearing what you guys have to say! It means so much to me that you would read this.
> 
> In this chapter, Victor and Yuuri get to finally talk! But things are still strained. And some frightening things happen. But knowing these two goofs, they'll persevere!

Makkachin pounced on Yuuri when the door opened. It was like the dog was famished for Yuuri’s company, with more excitement for the brunette from one day’s absence than after being apart from his owner for three. If it wasn’t for Victor’s grip on Yuuri, the omega would have collapsed in a dizzy daze. 

“Makkachin, I missed you!” Victor could tell Yuuri was going through another intense spell of his vertigo. It took him three tries until he finally managed to pet the dog. 

Victor carefully guided Yuuri to the couch, where the omega sat stiffly, trying to stop the room from spinning. Makkachin rested his head on those soft thighs and sighed contently.

“Are you hungry?” Victor asked. 

“No… I don’t think I can keep anything down,” Yuuri replied honestly. His body was still wrecked from the prolonged use of suppressants. “But I would like to take a shower.” 

Victor tried to not imagine Yuuri’s body naked and glistening wet. 

\---

Victor helped Yuuri into the bathroom, but from then on, the Japanese man insisted that he could shower on his own. Victor had wanted to help but he was terrified of how Yuuri would interpret that. And if he was being honest, he wasn’t sure he could trust himself. He was desperate for Yuuri now that his alpha was aware he was an omega. 

It clawed at his chest and blurred Victor’s thoughts. 

So instead, he sat on the couch and lazily flipped through his phone, listening to the sound of water running. He gently pat Makkachin’s fur, noticing that the dog was happiest now with both Victor and Yuuri home. 

“Did you miss Yuuri too?” he asked and got a small but encouraging bark. 

A loud clatter and thud came from the bathroom. He heard a cry that was unmistakably Yuuri. Victor darted up and ran to the door. Makkachin whining behind him. At first he wanted to barge into the room, but he resisted. So he knocked.

“Yuuri… Yuuri are you alright?” he was nervous. Was he overreacting? Would Yuuri think Victor just wanted to pounce on his naked flesh? 

“I… I fell.” Victor could hear how embarrassed Yuuri was even with his voice being muffled by the door. 

“Can… can I come in?” He swallowed. 

A pause. And then finally.

“Yes…” 

Victor was surprised that the door was unlocked when he touched the handle. It spoke volumes at how much he trusted the Russian. Gathering all his resolve, he pushed.

But he wasn’t prepared for what he saw.

Yuuri was beautifully sprawled on the floor, only propped up with one elbow. His lower half was just barely covered by a towel and the rest of him was a creamy tan with water clinging onto him like dew. His initial urge was to lap away those drops with his tongue. Dark hair was plastered against his face, flushed pink from the heat of the shower. 

Victor’s nostrils flared in desire and his adam’s apple bobbed with a deep swallow. 

He couldn’t smell any pheromones and for that he was thankful. 

Ever so slowly, he inched towards Yuuri and knelt on the ground beside him. 

“Are you hurt?” He nervously offered a hand to Yuuri, unable to stop himself from trembling. 

“I think I’m ok.” Yuuri’s brown eyes seemed glazed over. If Victor let his imagination run wild, he could see those eyes glistening with tears from beneath him on a bed. But he resisted. Or at least tried desperately. 

Yuuri took his hand, wet and hot from the remains of the shower. 

How Victor wanted to put those fingers in his mouth and suck. 

Instead he slowly tugged and propped Yuuri up. The omega placed his hands on Victor’s shoulders. 

And Victor loved how they fit there. 

But then came the moment to steady Yuuri and help him up. Victor didn’t know where to put his hands on Yuuri’s body. He didn’t even know where to put his eyes! 

He tried to lift Yuuri by placing his hands on the omega’s arms, but not without noticing how deliciously his fingers sank into skin. He tried to rise up but Yuuri tumbled, ending on top of Victor, his towel lost and Victor’s eyes locked right onto Yuuri’s chest. 

Yuuri’s body was beautiful. And here it was naked above Victor. He was built like the ideal skater. Slender and curved. He wanted to envelop Yuuri’s dusty rose nipples with his mouth and suck. The thought went straight to his groin. 

“Victor, I’m so sorry! I can’t tell which way is up.” Victor could see it in Yuuri’s eyes. How they darted back and forth trying to focus on something that would stay still. 

If Victor wanted, right in that moment, he could have taken Yuuri. All he needed to do was release his quickly growing arousal and push inside Yuuri. There were no clothes to tear aside. And Victor was stronger and larger. His mouth was so close to Yuuri’s neck and it bothered him how there wasn’t a single drop of his scent. 

Yuuri must have used scent blocking soaps. 

But Victor hushed his desperate alpha and placed his hands on Yuuri’s waist. Skin touched skin and Yuuri gasped. 

Victor held back a groan. Now that he knew Yuuri could make such a sweet sound he wanted more. 

Trying not to admire how his hands felt on dip of the omega’s waist he slowly sat up and pulled Yuuri up with him. 

For a moment he saw between Yuuri’s legs. How could he pink there too? They had taken baths with one another in Hasetsu, but they were never this close. There was always a careful distance that Yuuri maintained between their bodies and now Victor knew why. 

Yuuri’s arm was around his neck and his head pressed into his shoulder. The wetness of his raven hair seeping into Victor’s expensive clothes but the alpha didn’t care. 

Slowly, they made it to Yuuri’s bedroom, which was further away than Victors. For a moment, he had thought of taking Yuuri into his own room. Make him nest there and stay there forever. But he kept walking. 

He sat Yuuri down onto the bed and tried not to recall all the fantasies of being with Yuuri on a such a surface like lovers. Yuuri quickly grabbed a throw from his bed and wrapped it around himself. 

That stung Victor a bit. 

‘I resisted, didn’t I?’, he thought. He wanted to be rewarded for his behavior like a child waiting to be praised. 

The omega shivered. 

‘Oh! He must be cold!’ Victor felt relieved. 

“Does anything hurt?”

“I can’t tell…”

Victor made a noise of confusion.

“When you overdose on suppressants, everything hurts…” 

Yuuri was in too much pain and everything was spinning. He wasn’t quite aware of what he was even saying at this point. The only parts of him feeling any relief were the ones Victor had touched. 

“Oh…” Victor couldn’t say anything. He saw himself to blame and couldn’t find words to comfort Yuuri. 

“Could… could you hand me the lotion in the first drawer of the dresser?”

“Eh?” 

“The soap won’t last without the lotion.”

Victor cocked his head in confusion.

“The scent blockers.” Yuuri’s face was more red now than it had ever been before. 

“Oh!” 

Victor scrambled to the dresser. 

And there it was. The bottle was nondescript. Physical proof that Yuuri was an omega. 

How had Victor not noticed it? The absence of scent. The products in their shared bathroom that lacked any labels. Of course they were scent blockers. 

He handed it to Yuuri and then created as much distance as he could between himself and Yuuri. 

Yuuri looked at the bottle his eyes downcast and clearly he wanted to say something. 

“I’m… I’m sorry, Victor.” 

And Yuuri broke. 

His fingers laced into his wet black hair and his body quivered. 

“Yuuri?”

“I should have told you.” Yuuri’s voice was cracking from choking back tears and the weight of his guilt. 

Victor’s chest ached and all he wanted to do was hold Yuuri close. 

Yuuri looked up at Victor, his face desperate and wrecked with tears. As beautiful Yuuri was in that moment, so full of emotions, he just wanted to kiss away those tears. 

“I never...” he hiccuped. “I never wanted to hurt you.” Yuuri’s eyes were now on Victor’s wound. The one the alpha had given himself instead of marking Yuuri. The temptation to sink his teeth into the omega and claim him were still there. “I thought I could handle it myself. I never thought… never thought that being an omega would hurt you.”

And there it was. Yuuri had finally said it. Finally admitted out loud to the man he loved and admired.

Yuuri couldn’t take Victor’s silence anymore. 

“Please… please say something.”

How Victor ached. 

“Yuuri… Yuuri, no…” 

Yuuri flinched and shrank away from Victor. A poor choice of words. The alpha berated himself. He wasn’t doing this right. He wasn’t comforting Yuuri. 

“Yuuri, you’ve done nothing wrong.” And Victor believed those words. Unable to stand the space between himself and the weeping skater, Victor walked closer. He kneeled in front of Yuuri.

“I should be apologizing, Yuuri. I don’t know what happened. I would never want to hurt you and I did. I attacked you. If it wasn’t for Yakov and Yurio… I… I would have…”

“That’s what I mean! You wouldn’t have… but I wasn’t careful! I… I made you…!” Yuuri was struggling how to say it was his pheromones that put Victor into such a strong rut. It still made no sense to him. He was an omega but Victor was such a prized alpha. How could he want someone like Yuuri?

“No! I should have been able to resist. Yuuri, I saw how scared you were but I couldn’t stop. I never want to frighten you. Never hurt you.”

“You didn’t… you never have…” Yuuri’s fingertips touched the wound on Victor’s arm. It was a violent scab in the shape of the alpha’s teeth, deep purple bruises framing it. If it had ached before, it didn’t now. Yuuri’s touch was so soothing on his flesh that prickled from the after effects of his rut. “But I have hurt you…” His Yuuri was in so much pain and it was palpable in his voice. 

Victor knew he shouldn’t touch Yuuri. But he took Yuuri’s hands in his anyway. If his words couldn’t reach Yuuri, then maybe his touch could. 

“Yuuri, this isn’t your fault.”

“But it is…”

“No Yuuri… I’ve never reacted to an omega like that before. Not even when I first presented at twelve…”

“And I don’t understand how…! Victor, I’m an omega but I look so dull. I’ve never had that happen before. I swear! “

“Yuuri, how could you say you’re dull?”

“Look at me…”

“Yuuri, I am!” Victor cradled the omega’s hands and brought them close to his face. “Yuuri I will never attack you again.” He gently kissed the gold ring that was on Yuuri’s hand. “I swear it.” 

“Now please say you’ll stay here with me.” 

Yuuri’s eyes widened. Even though the world was spinning, he could clearly see Victor in that moment. 

“Victor… I should be the one asking that…” The brunette gathered all his courage and raised Victor’s hands to mouth. He brushed his lips against Victor’s matching ring. “I should be asking you to keep me beside you. None of this would have happened if I wasn’t… wasn’t an omega.”

“Yuuri is Yuuri.” 

Those were the words that Yuuri needed to hear the most. He was trembling again, holding back tears. Not because he was heart broken. But because Victor gave Yuuri what he had always wanted. 

To just be Yuuri. Not an omega that was weak and fragile. Nor an omega that just needed to be marked. But Katsuki Yuuri. 

He stopped fighting. For just that moment, he let himself feel everything. Feel the weight of being an omega. Of the burden that came with hiding it. The ravages it had on his body and how it dictated his life. But all of that was alright. Because Victor saw Yuuri for all he was and in the end accepted him. 

Tired of resisting, Victor released Yuuri’s hands. The omega seemed shocked at the sudden lack of contact. But Victor’s hands were now framing Yuuri’s face. The alpha admired those soft features. The round lips. Those large, almond eyes. He brushed a thumb against Yuuri’s eyelashes, wiping away those precious tears. 

Victor was so enthralled. Only Yuuri could make him feel so many emotions. He whispered words of awe in Russian. Only his mother tongue could capture his feelings. 

You’re beautiful. I love you. I need you beside me. Please never go. 

Yuuri didn’t know what Victor was saying. But it calmed him. His voice was always huskier in Russian. More confident and powerful. 

Yuuri wanted to hear more. 

But Yuuri was also becoming more aware that his scent blocking soap was fading. It needed to be used in combination with the lotion. He didn’t want Victor’s hands to leave his face. Those long, slender fingers soothing him. Brushing away tears like they were precious diamonds. 

“Victor…” 

The alpha seemed to realize it too. The faintest hint of honeysuckle and cardamom. His breath hitched. If he wanted, he could coax out Yuuri’s pheromones with his own. Already bergamot and honeysuckle were mixing like a sweet syrup. His heart was pounding. Their faces were already so close. 

He remembered how it made him feel the last time. Wanting to drown in Yuuri’s scent. 

One more time, in Russian. 

“я люблю тебя” 

I love you. 

And then he let go. 

Unbeknownst to each other, they both held back whines at the loss of touch. 

Victor gave Yuuri space to apply this lotion. He couldn’t look. It seemed so intimate that Yuuri would rub his own body in ointment, covering every bit of himself that he could. Yuuri touching himself. The lotion made slick, wet sounds that took Victor’s mind places it shouldn’t. He turned his back and busied himself with finding clothes for Yuuri. 

He helped dress Yuuri when it was over. The omega was scentless. Something he was both thankful for and mourned. 

Makkachin burst into the room, finally sensing that the tension had eased. He hopped onto the bed next to Yuuri and placed his head onto the brunette’s stomach anticipating pats. 

“Makkachin, let’s go. We need to let Yuuri rest.” 

The dog turned away from his owner and settled into Yuuri deeper. It was almost maddening that his own dog could be closer to Yuuri than he could.

“Makkachin…” he whined. 

“Makkachin can sleep here if he wants. It’s alright.” Yuuri was smiling so affectionately at the poodle. 

“He loves you more than me,” Victor whined. Yuuri laughed.

For this moment, they had settled into their old routine. Before Yuuri was an omega. While it felt comforting, it wasn’t enough. 

Victor wanted more. 

\---

“Katsudon, what the hell are you doing here?” 

Victor was tightening his skates while Yuuri was sitting beside him, packing the Russian’s guards away. 

“I can’t skate but I can still watch.” While Yurio tried to be hard, Yuuri responded softly. 

“Shouldn’t you be in bed? You were puking all of yesterday.” 

“I’m not on suppressants anymore. That should go away in a few days. You don’t need to worry, Yuri!”

“I… I’m not worried!” the young alpha got flustered. It irked Victor but at the same time, he found it incredible how Yuuri had tamed the blond. 

Yurio leaned in closer to Yuuri. Victor stiffened but it went unnoticed. Softly the teen spoke. 

“If you’re off them… are you gonna be alright? Will you be safe?” His blue eyes briefly flickered to Victor. The older alpha noticed it and glared back.

“I’ve used soap and lotion. And…” Yuuri hooked a finger on the neck of his shirt and tugged. His neck, shoulder and back covered in multiple patches to the point of excess.

“Yuuri! What if someone sees!” Yuuri pulled the hem back to place. 

But not before Yurio got even closer and sniffed. 

Victor’s stance started to change. He straightened his back and pushed down his shoulders, not liking the intimacy between the two Yuris at all. 

Yurio was satisfied that Yuuri smelled of nothing. He moved away and noticed Victor.

“What’s wrong with you?” Victor quickly shrank hoping Yuuri didn’t notice. And it seemed like he hadn’t. Yuuri was rummaging through his bag instead. 

Yurio and Victor had their skates on and stepped onto the ice, leaving Yuuri behind on a bench, watching. 

Away from Yuuri’s earshot, Yurio spun around and stared the taller alpha down. 

“You didn’t do anything to him, did you?” 

“What…?”

“Last night. You took him home. He wasn’t in any shape to say no to anyone.”

Victor knew Yurio was just caring for his friend but it made him see red. He quickly grabbed the younger alpha by the chin and squeezed. 

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that? Aren’t you getting too chummy with Yuuri?” 

“What?” Yuri scoffed. “That’s rich coming for you, Victor. I haven’t touched the piggy. Unlike you.” He slapped away Victor’s hand.

“I haven’t done anything…” 

Yurio smacked Victor’s arm, right on his self inflicted wound. Victor hissed. His wound still ached. 

“That says otherwise.” The young alpha skated away, leaving Victor behind. 

\---

Yuuri watched everyone skate at first. Or rather, mostly watched Victor. But the movements were too rapid and he felt his vertigo kick back in. 

He had pulled out his phone and was instead looking at photos Phichit had recently posted online. He felt a pang as he missed his friend. 

Too drawn into his phone, he didn’t notice he was being watched until someone sat down next to him. 

Looking up, he saw it was a man he didn’t know but recognized from around the rink. 

“H… hello?” he greeted him, feeling anxious at the proximity between himself and the stranger. 

“You’re an omega aren’t you?” 

“... What?”

Yuuri had doubled all his efforts now that he was off suppressants and back to being around Victor. He didn’t want another reason for Yakov to tear him away from Victor. He used lotions, soaps, ointments, patches… anything and everything. He had no scent. 

The man’s eyes glimmered as he grabbed Yuuri’s neckline. He tugged with so much enthusiasm that the fabric almost tore. Yuuri’s patches on display, their pale white contrasting against his flesh. Acidic panic rose to the back of his throat.

“You wouldn’t be wearing these if you weren’t.” The stranger was on the verge of giggling. 

Yuuri began to smell that he was an alpha. His scent overpoweringly of a bitter musk. 

“Please let go…” He didn’t want to trigger the alpha into any rash motions. 

“You flashed your neck earlier. Your pretty unmarked neck… you wanted me to see it, didn’t you?” Yuuri could smell his excitement and was choking on it. He couldn’t scream. It would have only egged the alpha on. 

“I didn’t… I’m not…”

The alpha was drooling now. Yuuri didn’t want any of it to touch him. He flinched back but that was the wrong move. The stranger growled.

Yuuri could only think of Victor.

Thick hands grabbed the back of his neck, pushing to make him bare his glands. To make his submit. But he resisted. The other hand was tearing at his patches. 

“Stop it…”

“I’m going to impregnate you, little omega.”

Yuuri wanted to retch. 

He started to fight back. He lashed his limbs hoping they would land a blow. Unknowingly, he scratching the alpha’s face. Yuuri looked up and saw a line of blood. 

That wasn’t good. 

He found himself slammed onto the bench and being twisted. Everything was spinning. Yuuri’s vertigo was unforgiving. His face was pressed against cold metal as he heard the sound of fabric ripping. The weight of the man’s body crushing him. 

“Please, get off!” Even now he tried to be polite, afraid to send to alpha over the edge. He squirmed, trying to escape. But large, grubby hands finally locked him into place. One on his shoulder, and one on his head. “No… I don’t want this!” 

“You’re an omega. You were made for this.” 

There was a growl and the thick sound of skin slamming into skin. The heaviness of the alpha was off of him. 

Yuuri craned his neck to see Victor. The silver alpha pounced on the other. His movements were unforgiving. There were snarls and deep growls. Sounds that didn’t seem like they could come from a human. 

Victor was the stronger alpha. He pinned the other man down easily. But that didn’t stop his attack. 

\---

He had been on the rink languidly going through the motions when he smelled cardamom. At first he thought he was dreaming. He had watched Yuuri cover himself in ointments and patches only hours earlier. 

Then the scent turned sour and Victor could taste fear. Not his own. Not at first.

He looked over to where he had left Yuuri only to see someone on top of him. He saw red. He couldn’t think. Couldn’t react in any other way than to attack. 

Before he knew it, he was on top of the alpha, his fists pounding into flesh. His hands hurt from force. There was splatters of blood and Victor didn’t know whose it was. 

“Victor! Victor stop!” 

Who was saying his name? It sounded so nice when they said it. 

“Victor! I’m alright! It’s ok! Please stop!” 

His hands moved to the man’s neck to squeeze. 

Someone tugged on his back. He growled and shrugged off the touch. 

\---

Yuuri kept on calling Victor’s name. Yakov and Yurio were there too, but they were afraid to touch Victor. His pheromones were radiating from him like daggers. It seared skin and made breathing difficult. 

Georgi and Mila looked from the edge of the ice. 

Yuuri didn’t know how to break Victor’s rage. He had never seen a man so completely lost to his inner alpha. It was bestial. No one could know how to quell this anger. 

“Victor!” he called over and over. 

He tried to reach for him, but the alpha snarled back. 

“Alpha?” he tried. And Victor’s movements stopped. 

He looked at Yuuri. Like a lost child.

“I’m alright… see?” Yuuri opened his arms in a gesture to show that no part of him was wounded. But it seemed that Victor read that as something else. He released the nameless alpha and moved towards Yuuri, burying himself into the omega’s embrace. 

Yakov used that moment to drag the other alpha away before Victor attacked again. 

The old beta mumbled about how the stranger would never show his face again in the rink and other threats that were less that acceptable to say outloud. 

The Russian’s head was pressed against Yuuri’s chest, listening to the omega’s heart beat. He nuzzled it softly but held on with a tight grip.

“Victor?” No answer. “Alpha?” 

Victor looked up. His blue-green eyes so wounded. So afraid. 

“I’m ok. Your… your omega is ok.” It felt so presumptuous for Yuuri to say those words out loud. But it seemed like they did their magic. Victor softened. His breath started to steady. 

Yuuri wrapped his arms around Victor. His hands patting soothing circles. 

Minutes passed by.

“Yuuri?” 

The brunette released Victor. The alpha found himself trembling. There was blood on his hands. Yuuri’s shirt was torn and his patches scattered. 

“Did… did I do this?” he grabbed a scrap of fabric off the floor. “Did I… attack you again?” 

Fear passed through him like a flood.

“Did I hurt you?!”

“No! No, Victor! You protected me. I’m alright.”

“You’re afraid. I did something...”

“No! Victor, you stopped that alpha from hurting me.” 

“What…?” Anger was starting to build up. “Who…?” 

Yuuri didn’t want to loose him to the anger again. He grabbed Victor’s hand and kissed the ring on his finger. A gesture from the night before that he hoped would ground the alpha. And it did. His pheromones dissipated into gentle rain and citrus bergamot. 

“You’re not hurt?” He was finally Victor again. 

“No… What about you?”

“I… I’m alright… I’m sorry I did that, Yuuri.”

“Are you two done?” Yurio was hovering over them now. Victor’s instincts wanted to shove the young alpha way but Yuuri was gentle as always.

“Sorry, Yurio. I made a mess again, didn’t I?” Yuuri tried to laugh but it came off as just his nerves. 

“This is fine, Katsudon. I’m glad you’re not hurt.” 

Finally, a genuine smile broke on his lips and Victor loved it but hated that it was Yurio that put it there.

“Thank you, Yuri.”

“Now go put some patches on, you’re stinking up the room.” The young alpha did his best to seem unaffected and callous. But his face gave him away. 

“Right! Thing is… I didn’t pack any clothes because I wasn’t going to practice. Can I borrow one of yours?” Yuuri asked only because their sizes were similar.

“No!” Victor couldn’t take any more of this. “I mean, you can wear something of mine. You won’t have to bother with washing and returning it.”

“Oh... Thanks, Victor!”

“You’re jealously is boring, old man,” Yurio lightly kicked Victor’s shin once Yuuri was out of earshot. 

“Yurio!” Victor whined and leaned into the young blond. “Why are you two so close now?” He feigned affection, hoping it would get Yuri to talk. To tell him what had happened when Victor was away.

“Get off!” the teen huffed and pushed back, but Victor was made of mostly muscle and weighed immensely. “You’re like a baby afraid someone’s going to take his favorite toy away.”

“Yuuri is so much more than that, Yurio…” The tone got serious and Yurio shifted awkwardly. “Yuuri… I love him…”

“No…” 

“Yurio?”

“Don’t tell me this. I don’t want to hear it.”

“Do… do you have feelings for Yuuri?” Victor didn’t know what to do. How to react. 

The smaller alpha snapped.

“I’m not you, Victor. I’m not so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I forget about everyone else.”

“What is that suppose to mean?”

“It means that I can tell you’re happy he’s an omega. You’ve always wanted him to be yours. And now you can do it. In name… in status… in the chemistry of his body…” 

“Yurio, I would never do that to Yuuri. Not… not unless he wants it.”

“You’re awfully hopeful.” Yurio gave a sigh. He quickly slapped Victor’s wound again. 

“Ow! Yuri!”

“Just… don’t hurt him.”

“As if he would let me…”

The young alpha finally laughed. 

“You’re right… the piglet’s too stubborn.”

And something settled back in place between the two alphas. Victor wasn’t forgiven. But he wasn’t hated. 

That was enough for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that the fight scene didn't seem rushed. Yuuri would have absolutely been able to fight back stronger if it wasn't for his vertigo. I don't think Yuuri is weak and I'm certain Victor is of the same mind. 
> 
> Thanks again for reading!
> 
> -DazzledGhosts


	5. The Resolve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there! And thank you so much for reading and commenting. It's so exciting to hear what you guys think and it gives me an idea of where to go with the story. 
> 
> So this chapter reveals why Yurio has been particularly invasive between Yuuri and Victor's relationship! I know many of you were curious in both why he was being a bit meddlesome and why the two Yuris are closer. I hope you are happy with the answer to both those questions. 
> 
> It's a chapter that's got little conflict and little action, but I think it's needed after the last incident!

Yuri came out of the locker room wearing Victor’s clothes: a black shirt that was a touch large and showed too much collarbone and the Russian’s red-white jacket. Yuuri’s hands were swallowed by the sleeves. Victor’s body was, after all, taller and more broad than Yuuri’s slender form. And it sent Victor’s heart in a frenzy to see it. 

Did Yuuri smell like Victor in that moment? What did did the scent of Victor’s rain and bergamot make with Yuuri’s honeysuckle and cardamom? 

“Keep your mouth open any longer and you’ll drool, old man.” Yurio tried to be nasty, but Victor could tell the young alpha was worried about something. The blond’s heart wasn’t in the insult. He couldn’t quite figure it out. 

Victor swallowed. He wanted to approach Yuuri. 

But the Japanese skater was talking to Yakov, bowing his head head, waving his arms emphatically, and stuttering apologies for interfering with practice. Yakov insisted that none of this was Yuuri’s fault and that the police would be called should his attacker ever appear at the rink. 

Victor wanted to collect Yuuri in his arms. To use his embrace to reassure that Yuuri had no blame in any of this. 

But he was afraid. Wasn’t Victor just like that alpha who had pounced on him? Hadn’t he done the very same thing days before? He couldn’t look Yuuri in the eyes, afraid that what would be reflected back to himself was just a rabid alpha. 

Yurio left Victor alone and walked up to Yuuri. Doing what Victor couldn’t gather the courage to do. 

\---

Yurio approached Yuuri cautiously. He wanted to see if the older man was hurt. Their relationship had changed the night Yuuri stayed at his place. 

He remembered how quite the omega was when they entered Yurio’s space. It smelled distinctly of the young alpha, considering he had yet to learn how to tame his pheromones, and frankly didn’t care to in his own apartment. 

A scent of hyacinths and wet earth. The alpha hated that he smelled floral, but for a brief moment wondered what hyacinths and honeysuckle would taste like together. 

But Yuuri’s eyes were so downcast that he was ashamed of those thoughts. Instead he ushered Yuuri to put his belongings into his bedroom. 

“My space is small Katsudon. Not like Victor’s stupidly large apartment. Just put your stuff in my room. You can spend the night there.”

“Oh no! I can take the couch, Yuri!” There he went again, trying to take up as little space as possible. Always afraid of being a nuisance. 

And he was one to Yurio. A nuisance he couldn’t carve out of his heart. 

“I’ve had a long day, Katsudon. Please don’t argue with me.” He lead Yuuri into the bedroom where the omega placed his small bag. Yurio could tell the brunette didn’t intend to stay long. He had barely packed anything. Desperate to get back to Victor and it angered him. 

Not because he wanted to mate with Yuuri. He’s be lying he said hadn’t thought of it. Of growing taller than Yuuri and seeing what could unfold. 

But at the same time, those daydreams always seemed unfulfilling. In the end, he didn’t want to have Yuuri that way. Yuuri was something else to him and he wasn’t sure what. 

The silence was dredging on. Yuuri tried to busy himself with unpacking, but he didn’t have much. Just his suppressants, blockers, a change of clothes, and toothbrush. 

“I hope Yakov doesn’t mind watching over Makkachin.” Yuuri was desperate to start a conversation. But Yurio couldn’t pretend anymore. 

“Are you going to stay with him.” It didn’t sound like a question. Yurio knew. Of course Yuuri would return to Victor’s side. That’s how they were even if they were unaware of it. 

“Eh?” Yuuri wasn’t expecting that. Maybe some yelling or arguing. But not this quiet defeated anger. 

“Victor… are you going to go pretend that none of this happened and go back to him?”

“I… I would like for things to go back to how they were before… but I’d be lying if I thought they could.” Yuuri sounded so world weary. So the omega was aware of the consequences. 

“Victor’s selfish… and forgetful. And impulsive. Pushy and useless. And… and an alpha.”

Yurio didn’t know what he was saying. 

“He is forgetful,” Yuuri tried to laugh. To make light of the conversation. But Yurio snapped.

“It’s not funny, Katsudon. He tried… He tried to mark you!” 

“But… he didn’t, Yuri.”

“This time he didn’t! Next time… next time we might not be there!”

Yuuri was looking at him now. Concerned and unsure how to approach. 

“I trust him, Yurio.” He hated how soft Yuuri’s voice was. Soft but absolutely firm in the belief of what he was saying. 

“He’s an alpha!” Yuri was trembling. So much anger. So much fear and resentment. 

How can you trust an alpha? How can you trust Victor? 

How can you trust me?

“And I’m… I’m an omega, Yuri. But our secondary genders don’t make us who we are.” The older man took a step closer to Yuri. The young alpha’s instincts wanted to puff his chest up and stand tall, but he found himself shrinking back instead. “Yuri… you don’t have to answer me if you don’t want to. I don’t want to pressure you. But… but you hate alphas don’t you? Even though you are one?”

His blue eyes snapped up to Yuuri’s. They were so full of genuine care and compassion. Yuuri wanted to know. The teen alpha knew in that moment how much Yuuri saw his own self resentment. 

How could he see through him? 

Yurio crumbled onto his bed, sitting with his elbows propped on his knees and using his hair to hide his face. 

“My… my mother was an omega.” 

“Oh?” 

The mattress sank as Yuuri sat beside him. Yurio’s body feeling the omega’s warmth near him. 

“And my father was an alpha.”

Yuuri was born from two betas. He couldn’t imagine a household built between an alpha and omega. Not even one with himself in a leading role. 

“My father marked her on a whim. He said she smelled nice and he couldn’t really think much beyond that at the time. They didn’t even know eachother that well at the time. But they were alpha and omega. It’s what made sense. So my mother thought it was alright. But they realized that they couldn’t love each other. It was empty beyond their pheromones… Even after I was born they couldn’t find anything resembling affection. They were bound to each other forever… and they resented one another for it. They thought I could bring them together… but I just became another wedge.” 

Yuri didn’t realize hot tears were spilling down his face as Yuuri’s warm hand pushed aside his bangs. These were words he had never said out loud. He had locked these feelings deep inside himself. Hating what he was because of what it reminded him of. Refusing to acknowledge it because of his own pride. And here Yuuri was… getting Yurio to spill everything to him so easily just by being himself. For genuinely caring. 

“He was so cold to her. And she had no one else to turn to. Not as long as his stupid mark was on her neck. He found a beta and soon left us for them. I watched her fall apart. Because some alpha thought she was disposable after sinking his teeth into her. He ruined her. She couldn’t be with him but she couldn't live without him… That’s what being his mate–an alpha’s mate–meant.”

“Yuri… is that what you afraid of? Of being like that?”

Yurio couldn’t say yes. Instead he shook his head in agreement. 

“I’ve seen so many alphas like that. They just take and take without thinking what happens. They ruin everything!”

“Yuri… you’ll never be anything like that.”

Soft arms pulled Yuri in. He found his head next to Yuuri’s. Soft black hair brushing against the side of his face. A neck for the most part bare before him. He didn’t have the urge to bite. Just the desire to be comforted. 

“It’s alright, Yuri. I know you’d never do anything to hurt someone. Being an alpha doesn’t mean you’re so callous to other people just as much as being an omega doesn’t mean being weak.” 

His breath quivered as he fought back sobs. There he was, saying everything it was that Yuri had wanted to hear. To have someone tell him that being an alpha didn’t define him. It was all he wanted.

No one had been this gentle before. Not even his mother. She saw too much of his father in him. 

“You’re stronger than that, Yuri.”

The omega pulled back from the embrace and grabbed Yuri’s face, making sure their eyes locked. 

“But what if Victor isn’t. What if he does that to you…?”

“He won’t do that. I trust him.”

“I don’t! I’ve known him longer!” 

“If not him… then trust me, Yuri.”

Yurio looked at the omega. He had always pitied omegas. They reminded him of his mother. Always so sad and in the end, broken from it. But Yuuri wasn’t to be pitied. Yes he had faced hardships that Yurio couldn’t imagine. But Yuuri seemed so strong that it seemed wrong to pity him. He had so much resolve to continue on regardless of what society or his very own body wanted for him. Yuuri had fought so hard to get here. 

“I… I know you’re not my mother… But I don’t want that to happen to you.” 

There. He said it. And he felt so naked after the words left his mouth. 

You’re important to me. I need you here. What if Victor hurts you and you leave?

Yuuri gave him a smile. It was so warm and made everything else fade away. 

“Thank you, Yuri. Thank you for letting me know. And thank you for caring.” 

“I... I’m not!” Yuri tried to hide his embarrassment. 

“I trust you, Yuri. You’ll always do what’s right. So please… trust me too.” Yuri thought for a moment. 

“I’ll… I’ll try. But Victor… he’s such a mess of a person. It’s hard to trust him.”

Yuuri laughed. There was just something about how the young alpha described his idol. How his voice was in absolute disbelief that someone like Victor could even exist. 

“I don’t understand him! Always being to frivolous and flamboyant… He’s impossible! He’ll surely hurt you… Stop laughing!” 

But Yurio couldn’t resist the omega’s laughter. It was so heartwarming to hear. He cracked a smile and stifled a laugh.

“You’re right! He is so flamboyant! I’ve never seen someone get so worked up over something as small as… as a tie! He actually burned my favorite tie when I moved in with him. Then he bought me five to replace it. They’re just ties but they’re more expensive than everything else I own!” 

They started to trade stories about the alpha. And it felt so good for Yurio to mock him. To feel laughter in his lungs after having filled them up with so much fear and doubt. 

\---

That night, the two Yuri’s slept in the same bed. It wasn’t sensual. Nothing even remotely like that. But rather, Yuuri knew how alone the young alpha felt. How he had alienated himself in his anger and self loathing. So he stayed close and gently wiped away tears and patted away whimpers. 

Yuuri wasn’t Yurio’s lover. He wasn’t his mother either. Yuuri was just Yuuri.

\---

“You… are you ok?” Yurio asked.

“I’m fine! Just dizzy!” Yuuri was downplaying what had happened to him. But everyone could see the slight quiver in his limbs. He had finally attained some semblance of normalcy only to have some alpha go feral on him. 

Victor finally approached them. He looked like a dog that had been wounded. It frustrated Yurio to no end that Yuuri was the one who had been attacked, but Victor looked as if he needed consoling. And Yuuri was going to give it to him. 

But he remembered the promise he gave Yuuri. He would trust Yuuri even if it meant letting Victor close. But that didn’t stop him from sending daggers Victor’s way with his glare. 

\---

Victor gathered all his courage. 

“Yuuri, I’d understand if you don’t want to…”

“Shall we go home, Victor?” 

“Eh…?”

He was about to tell Yuuri he didn’t need to come home with him. That he understood if being around another alpha like him would be too much. But here Yuuri was, giving him everything he ever wanted. 

“It’s been such a long day and I miss Makkachin. Maybe we can pick him up a treat? I noticed we’re running low on them.”

“Yes… yes that would be wonderful, Yuuri.”

\---

Yuuri didn’t know why Victor couldn’t look him in the eye. Was he upset with Yuuri? Did he think that Yuuri had enticed the alpha? Or was he angry that Yuuri got in the way of practice again? 

“Yuuri, I’d understand if you don’t want to…” 

Was Victor tired of him already? Was being an omega proving to be too much? Did he want to wash his hands of Yuuri already? 

He didn’t want that! He just wanted to be beside Victor. The place that he felt the most at ease. 

“Shall we go home, Victor?” 

He stopped Victor. He didn’t want to be cast aside. Not now. Not after being attacked. He wanted to go home. Where he felt safest and most wanted. 

\---

They had bought treats for Makkachin on the way home. But beyond that they were silent. 

Victor wanted to say something. But the words dried up in his throat. 

When they arrived at their apartment, Makkachin circled around Yuuri and waited to be pet. Yuuri spent most of the evening with the poodle, curled on the couch. His frame looking smaller than usual next to the large dog and still in Victor’s clothes. 

The Russian thought of ways to break the silence. He remembered there was tea that Yuuri had brought from Hasetsu in the cupboard. When Victor went to grasp for it, he realized how much his hands ached. A small grunt escaped his throat. 

The alpha looked up to see Yuuri next to him with concern. Victor jumped, surprised to find the brunette next to him.

Of course. Yuuri smelled of nothing and could easily sneak up on him.

“You’re hand is injured…” 

Victor looked at his hand. His knuckles were red and covered in fresh, patchy scabs. He couldn’t remember getting the wounds. Just the fury of someone on top of Yuuri and the feeling of flesh under his fists. 

Yuuri carefully took the tea container from Victor. The alpha’s larger hand twitched from the touch and Yuuri’s heart sank. 

“I’m sorry, Victor…” 

His pale hand was cradled so carefully in Yuuri’s two. 

“I… I did this. I thought I was being careful but you got hurt again.”

Tears were threatening to spill from Yuuri’s eyes. Victor could tell in the way his chocolate irses glistened. Yuuri’s thumb brushed against the inflamed skin and the alpha hissed at the pain. 

Yuuri went to drop Victor’s hand but the alpha grabbed back, not wanting Yuuri to let go. 

“Yuuri…” Victor always said the other’s name with so much emotion. Desire, affection, doubt… “None of this is your fault Yuuri.”

He could see Yuuri didn’t believe him. He tried again.

“If anything Yuuri… it’s mine. I’ve made such a mess of things.” Yuuri shook his head in denial. “I’ve frightened you so much…”

“Victor!” Yuuri snatched away his hands from the alpha’s grasp. He felt stunned at the loss of touch. But now Yuuri’s hands were gripping at his shirt. The fabric clenched tightly in his grasp. “Please don’t tell me you think that! That you think I’m afraid of you!” 

“I attacked you, Yuuri. I was just like that alpha. I tore your clothes just like he did… Pinned you down.” 

He couldn’t look Yuuri in the eye and felt tremors in his chest from his sheer shame. 

“And even today… I was so lost to my anger. To my instinct. I saw how afraid you were, Yuuri.”

“Not of you! Victor, I trust you!” 

“I’m like that alpha… another monster…”

He still couldn’t look at Yuuri. Yuuri’s small hands grabbed him by the side of the face. Victor wanted to both push Yuuri away and pull him in closer. He didn’t want to see his own reflection in Yuuri’s eyes. He was so certain he would see a starved alpha. So he moved to resist. 

But Yuuri was strong and Victor was honestly surprised. He found himself looking into Yuuri’s eyes. He didn’t see his own reflection. Only Yuuri. Who was so determined and anxious at the same time. 

“You’re nothing like him, Victor! This is the proof,” Yuuri released Victor’s face but instead grabbed Victor’s arm and pulled up the sleeve. The wound from Victor’s own teeth was still swollen angrily in his forearm. 

“How can you be so sure, Yuuri?” Victor moved his other hand to the crook of Yuuri’s neck. “You don’t know how much I want to do it…” His thumb brushed against a scent blocking patch that was nestled on top of his scent gland. Right where a mark would be made. 

Yuuri’s face bloomed red. 

“And you haven’t…” Yuuri mumbled. “I know you, Victor. You’ve done nothing but support me. You would never hurt me. Or anyone.”

“I hurt that alpha…” His thumb brushed once more against the patch, mourning that he wasn’t touching skin. He saw Yuuri quiver in response so he removed his hand.

“That was different and you know it.” Yuuri’s eyes were stern now. He wanted to show Victor who he saw before him right now. Not some heartless alpha, unfeeling to those before him. But rather a man who was so aware as his status as an alpha that he held everything gingerly, afraid of himself. 

“I’m just… so scared of myself, Yuuri. I’ve never felt like this before. I always thought I was a good alpha. I was almost proud of it.” He laughed bitterly.

“You are, Victor.” 

The Russian scoffed. 

“Do you think I’m a liar, Victor?” Yuuri’s voice was so wounded. “Do you think so little of me?” He was being unfair and Victor was certain Yuuri knew. 

“That’s playing dirty, Yuuri. Of course not.”

“Than if you don’t trust yourself, trust in me. Trust in the faith I have in you.” 

It was the second time in less than a week that Yuuri was asking this of an alpha. But Victor didn’t know that. 

All he knew was that Yuuri was beautiful in his resolve. Yes he was smaller than Victor, but he stood so tall and firm in his belief of Victor that he seemed to tower over the alpha. 

Yuuri, you’re so strong, he thought to himself. 

He took Yuuri’s right hand in his and pressed a kiss onto the gold band wrapped around the omega’s finger. 

Afraid to let Yuuri know but desperate to get the words out, he spoke in Russian.

You’re stronger than I’ll ever be. I love you so much. How can you be so good to me? I never want to hurt you.

Yuuri didn’t understand the words. But he was alright with that. 

“Now let’s bandage up your hand, alright?” Victor was still holding onto him. So Yuuri dragged Victor to the couch. 

Once more. 

“я люблю тебя.” I love you. “я так тебя люблю.” I love you so much. 

Yuuri had heard that phrase now several times. Victor had said it the night before as well. He didn’t know what it meant nor could he say it with his own mouth. But Victor said it so earnestly that it gave his heart and extra beat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's it for today! 
> 
> Next time I promise advances in Victor and Yuuri's relationship. Things have been painfully slow after the whirlwind of the first chapter. 
> 
> Thanks so very much!


	6. The Nectar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again,
> 
> And thank you so much! I am always floored by the comments and kudos you are all kind enough to leave me! It really means a lot to me and gosh, I don't think the story would shape itself the way it is without you. 
> 
> In this chapter, things didn't advance as far as I wanted for them to! There's a lot more that I wanted to say, but I think it's best if that goes in the next chapter. This one was getting a bit long. But I can promise a bit of Victor and Yurio's relationship softening. And for our two lovebirds: they're in for a bit of a bump. But they're strong and they've got this!
> 
> Thank you for reading!

Yuuri was too tired to change his clothes and go to bed. And to be honest, he didn’t want to remove Victor’s shirt and jacket just yet. They smelled of him.

If he closed his eyes and wrapped his own arms around himself, he could pretend that Victor was holding him. Though the Russian’s arms were much longer and more defined. But he could fool himself for the moment.

While off his suppressants, his body was more receptive. Everything seemed lighter. Easier.

The medicine was afterall, a poison. It was made to dullen his scent and senses. And with that, so too was his strength. It was a double edged sword.

Yuuri always forgot what breathing actually felt like when his body wasn’t weighed down from the pills. How he could move unencumbered. 

While that feeling was liberating, it also had downfalls.

Yuuri was lying on his bed, enveloped in Victor’s aroma, and he felt a faint ache. A feeling of emptiness. Slick slowly pooling in places that Yuuri wanted to forget about. 

But Victor’s bergamot scent was around him and it made his insides feel so hollow. As if the walls of his inner body were rubbing against each other, just waiting to filled. Desperate for friction.

He resisted at first, still feeling dizzy from his vertigo. But the more he tried to ignore it, the more he was aware of how empty he was.

It wasn’t a heat. Yuuri wasn’t due for a few more months. This wasn’t his body trying mate. This was Yuuri’s own desire. His desire for Victor–the man he loved more than anything–who was just beyond a wall from him resting in his own room. His Victor, who had kissed the ring on Yuuri’s hand.

Without realizing it, Yuuri raised his hand to his lips, pressing his mouth right where Victor’s had been. An indirect kiss.

It sent a spark through him. He couldn’t deny it anymore. 

His other hand snaked down his torso and slipped into his pants and past the elastic of his underwear. Yuuri tried not to imagine that his fingers where Victor’s when he pressed them against his entrance.

There was plenty of slick and when he pushed a finger in, more gushed out. Yuuri’s breath shuddered out of his lungs as his index sank in. There was resistance at first, only able to go two knuckles deep, but Yuuri’s honeysuckle and the remnants of Victor’s bergamot on his clothes mixed. 

He was drunk from it.

It wasn’t because this was an alpha’s scent. It was because it was Victor’s. His Victor.

Yuuri pushed in a second finger, feeling embarrassed as he could feel the ridges inside his own body. His innards tingling. Wanting more. Wanting Victor.

He didn’t bother scissoring or adding more fingers. He just wanted to feel friction. Desperately he thrusted into himself.

He was so sensitive now that the suppressants were gone. He knew it wouldn’t take much. Not when breathing in the smell of Victor.

His second hand moved to his arousal, touching himself there. But that didn’t seem to satisfy him. So Yuuri reached under his shirt–Victor’s shirt on him–and rolled a nipple under his fingers.

He muffled a moan.

Yuuri imagined his hands were Victor’s. That those beautifully strong hands were touching him. The omega mouthed Victor’s name, trying not to let the sounds spill past his throat. Silently shaping his lips to say:

“愛してる”

I love you.

Victor inside him. Victor hovering above him. Moving in, dragging out. His mouth on Yuuri. Panting against into his skin.

Yuuri flicked his own nipple imagining it to be the Russian’s tongue. How warm would it be?

Victor wanting him. The man’s body pressing into him. Those silver brows furrowed in desire for Yuuri. Blue-green eyes looking intently at him and only him. Grunting the omega’s name. Knotting him.

And that sent Yuuri reeling. He trembled and came, semen and slick messing up his underwear. He softly whimpered Victor’s name, unable to hold back.

Regaining his senses and his shame, Yuuri realized how much his room reeked of his scent. He wanted to lay there and languidly move his fingers around his insides longer. Basque in the sensation of his orgasm and the thought of Victor in him. But he needed to fix this. 

He tossed aside the clothes he was wearing and lit scent neutralizing candles. Changed his clothes and slapped patches onto himself haphazardly.

He couldn’t wash the clothes now. It was too late in the night and the aroma was too thick to open the door. Victor would be able to smell him in a heartbeat and the thought of the Russian knowing what Yuuri had done was too much. 

So he laid there, waiting for the neutralizers to do their work and feeling regretful at imagining Victor. He hated how he felt, wracked with guilt. Not because there was shame in touching himself. But because he imagined something he wanted and couldn’t have.

\--- 

Yuuri’s vertigo had finally eased to the point he could join everyone on the ice again. Victor and Yurio were sitting, taking a break while the Japanese skater put all of their stamina to shame. Victor’s eyes were glued to Yuuri. Watching as Yuuri spun his arms around his body and glided backwards into a beautiful step sequence. Seamlessly going from toe pick to blade. Moving slowly, sensually and then furiously changing direction.

Every motion shouting out longing. 

Victor wanted to be there beside Yuuri. He imagined himself skating up from behind, grabbing both of Yuuri’s outstretched hands. He would guide Yuuri. Spin him around and have that smaller body draped across his own as they move in unison.

_I want the answer of your longing to be me._

“Don’t forget to breathe, old man.” Yurio’s eyes were on Victor. 

“How can he be so beautiful…” he whispered, but the young alpha could still hear.

Victor would occasionally let his affection for the brunette skater slip out when he was around Yurio.

He wasn’t sure why. A part of him wondered if he was trying to lay claim to Yuuri. To ensure that the young alpha knew of his intentions, preventing him from approaching Yuuri. But was he that desperate of an alpha? Was he so shallow?

Even if that was his intention, it didn’t work at all. The two Yuris continued to get closer. Yurio could get Yuuri to make the sweetest smiles and draw out the most earnest laughter. 

In the end, Victor realized he let his affection spill out to Yurio because the smaller alpha could appreciate what he saw in Yuuri. And to have someone know spared himself the secret. It sat so heavily behind his mouth. How he wanted to praise Yuuri. To whisper into his skin everything he loved about him.

Yuuri flung his head back as he moved into an Ina Bauer. So much desperation in that motion. His arms open and his chest rising and falling. It was easily erotic. Like Yuuri was lost in the throws of his lover’s embrace.

Victor whistled.

“You’re gross.”

“Am I…? Why are you bothered, Yura?" 

Yurio gave no reply. Instead they both watched Yuuri move on the ice.

“You… you haven’t done anything to him have you?” Victor was stunned by the question. It wasn’t full of his usual rage. It was soft.

“Like what?”

“You know what I mean.”

Neither of them looked at one another. Their eyes glued to Yuuri.

“Of course not.”

“But you… you want to.” 

“Now that is not very fair, Yuri.” He huffed and propped his his chin on his hand. 

“I know… I know! I’m sorry, ok. It’s just… I don’t want him to get hurt.”

Shocked by the apology, Victor held his breath. His eyes no longer on the rink but on the young alpha, whose gaze was still on Yuuri.

“Do you… do you love him?” His breath was quivering. He couldn’t compete with Yurio for Yuuri’s affections. That would be too much for him. He couldn’t watch as the relationships that meant so much to him crumbled. He didn’t have that confidence in himself. Not after seeing how close the two could be. His heart pounding in anticipation of Yuri’s answer.

“Not in the way you’re thinking.”

 What did that mean?

“Please tell me, what way am I thinking?” 

“I don’t want to mate with him. Not really. In fact… I don’t think I want anyone to mate with him. I don’t like thinking about him like that.”

“Oh?” His heart eased to a steady quake.

“He’s fought so hard to get here, hasn’t he? He’s stronger than any beta or alpha I know. But… but things keep happening to him and I never knew.”

A pause.

“Did you know suppressants are a poison, Victor?”

Victor couldn’t say anything.

“I didn’t… And he’s been skating all this time with them. But now that he’s off them… just look at him. He skated beautifully in the past but this is something else. Now he’s…”

“He’s so light,” Victor finished for him.

“How much farther could he have gotten if he didn’t have to take them? Wouldn’t he have won gold by now?”

“We’ll find out this time, I guess?”

“We won’t though…”

“Eh?”

“He said he’s going back on them in a month.”

Victor swallowed. How did Yurio know so much when Victor knew nothing?

“How do you know this?”

“I asked him." 

How could Yuri ask all the questions that Victor was afraid of even forming in his thoughts?

His train of thought was broken as Yuuri leaped into a Salchow effortlessly.

“He won’t be able to do that soon…” Yurio sounded so mournful. “Not like that at least.” 

And that made Victor ache.

\---

“Yuuri…” they were back in their apartment. The brunette was trying to do laundry, but Victor stopped him. Yuuri looked nervous.

Did he know what was on Victor’s mind? Was he afraid to be in this small room with Victor? He realized he was blocking the entrance with his broad shoulders, so he leaned against the wall. Tried to make his large body small. Yuuri’s nerves didn’t seem to calm from the gesture. It stung imagining that Yuuri didn’t trust to be in the space with him.

“Yurio told me you were going back on your suppressants in a month…” Victor adopted the tone he used when he would coach. He tried to sound clinical.

If Yurio could asked, why couldn’t he?

“Oh… Ano… ano...” Yuuri pressed the clothes in the basket into a tighter lump. His Japanese mannerisms slipping out as he tried to find the right words. “Once it’s not so concentrated in my body I can go back on them.”

“Even though it hurts your skating?”

Yuuri looked up at him surprised. A slight twinge of red in his face.

“It’s not so bad…”

“I’ve seen you land more salchows today than I have in months, Yuuri.” It was hard to sound like coach Victor and not needy, desperate Victor.

_I want to see you fly like that Yuuri. I want to see the real you._

Yuuri gave a sad smile while fumbling with the clothes nervously.

“I… I have to Victor.”

“But you’re doing fine with the patches and lotions now, aren’t you?” Victor knew he shouldn’t pry. That it wasn’t his place. Yuuri had been doing this long before Victor entered his life. Of course the omega knew was he was doing. But the questions slipped past his lips leaving behind the taste of shame.

“They… they won’t be enough later though…” Yuuri’s hand went to the back of his neck, scratching awkwardly and nervously. Victor made a sound of confusion. What would be the difference now versus later? Why couldn’t Yuuri skate like this always? Yuuri had always skated beautifully. But comparing the Yuuri on suppressants with the Yuuri now there was a difference. It was like he had been freed of restraints. Now he could skate to his true potential and Victor just wanted to witness it. 

Come time for the tournament, even Victor would have a run for his money to keep up with Yuuri. The thought of them competing like that enthralled him! 

Yuuri sniffed and pressed down on the clothes. Victor wanted Yuuri to dump the clothes in the machine already and just look him in the eye.

“Why won’t it be enough?”

Yuuri’s blush spread to his ears and neck. It made Victor want to plant gentle kisses everywhere that was tinted rouge.

“My… my heat…”

Victor went rigid. Oh course… of course Yuuri would have a heat. He would need to use the suppressants then if he didn’t want to be trapped in a room, enslaved to his own body. Victor felt like such a fool. Yurio was right. He could only think of himself and his desire for Yuuri.

“Yuuri… I’m sorry. I… I didn’t think!”

“No… it’s easy to forget!” he gave a shy laugh. “I’ll still be taking that gold from you, even with the suppressants though.” There was a spark in those brown eyes.

What a bold claim from his usually timid Yuuri! There were moments when Yuuri would let his competitive nature slip through. They always delightfully surprised Victor. And this was one of those. 

Victor couldn’t suppress a laugh. He was amazed at how Yuuri broke the tension from their heavy conversation. He did it effortlessly and for that Victor was immensely grateful. 

“We’ll see about that… Now Yuuri, you go rest. I’ll do the laundry,” he offered after having laughed more than he had in a long while. Yuuri had skated longer than he had and must have been tired. He wanted to do something for Yuuri. Like an apology or a gesture to make him forget the awkward conversation they just had.

“No!” Yuuri’s playful demeanor quickly faded. Victor stood stunned. Yuuri rarely snapped at him. “I mean… it’s alright! I don’t mind! You need rest too!” He tried to recover.

“Yuuri, you’re legs are shaking from practice, just let me.”

He moved closer and grabbed the lip of the basket. It felt like Yuuri was hiding something and Victor didn’t like that.

“No! No really...”

“I insist, Yuuri,” Victor tugged and the basket was now his.

“I don’t mind at all!”

“I _can_ do laundry, Yuuri.” 

“No that’s not...”

“See?” He dumped the clothes into the machine.

Yuuri stared at him. His hands were covering his mouth. Why was Yuuri so adamant? So frightened?

It hit him like a wall.

The sweet smell of cardamom and honeysuckle. But that wasn’t all. It was his own smell intertwined with it. Both of them like a sweet syrup on Victor’s tongue. It was the scent he had dreamed of during his rut back in the hospital room that smelled of antiseptic. But now in his lungs, it was so much more satisfying. Nothing like he had dreamed of. And within it was laced arousal. 

Not his own… but Yuuri’s. It made the honeysuckle like nectar on his lips.

Where was it coming from? Victor’s blue eyes quickly flicked from Yuuri to inside the machine. There in the midst of the clothes was the his shirt that Yuuri had worn the day before. Eyes moved quickly back to Yuuri who looked mortified.

The more he breathed, the more Victor’s eyes dilated.

“Victor?”

He growled. Not out of anger. But the sheer desire he felt for Yuuri. He wanted Yuuri to keep saying his name but only laced with velvet want and need. His skin already burned hot and his arousal pressed against his pants. He doubled over, using the washing mashine to hold himself up. He couldn’t think.

And Yuuri was right there.

What would Yuuri look like against the wall of this tight space? One leg draped over Victor’s shoulder and the alpha inside him? How would that skin feel under his fingers? How did his slick taste? What sounds could slip out of his mouth. 

Could he make Yuuri feel good?

Victor’s eyes were locked onto Yuuri, barely any blue left.

“Yuuri…” he said the omega’s name with such thick desire. He saw Yuuri’s legs tremble at the mention of his name. 

If Victor wanted, he could let his pheromones roll out of him and coax Yuuri to him. He was painfully aware of how much control he had on the omega at the moment, who was completely frozen. 

Victor stood up, straightening his back and spreading back his shoulders. His chest broad enough to swallow Yuuri into an embrace. One he couldn’t escape.

His mouth parted and breathing erratically, trying to calm himself but each breath was Yuuri’s sweet honeysuckle and his bergamot. 

Teeth ached to press into skin. To taste that nectar with his own mouth.

Victor couldn’t resist anymore!

He made strides forward, towering over Yuuri’s frozen frame. He leaned in, let his his pheromones roll off of him. His hot breath nearing Yuuri’s neck. 

He looked into the omegas eyes expecting to see fear. 

But what he saw, he had not anticipated.

Trust. Unwavering and strong.

Groaning, Victor tugged on his sleeve and quickly raised his arm to his mouth. 

“No!” 

Yuuri grabbed his arm stopping him.

He just wanted to bite. To rid himself of the urge.

“Пожалуйста! я люблю тебя!”

Please! I love you!

He was rambling in Russian now.

I don’t want to hurt you. I need to bite. You don’t know how much it hurts. I want you to be mine. I’m sorry I’m like this. Please don’t be afraid of me. I love you.

Yuuri tugged on Victor’s arm, trying to stop the alpha from hurting himself.

As they wrestled with one another, Victor was surprised at how strong Yuuri was. Victor should have been able to overpower with his strength. He was uncoordinated with desire but that shouldn’t have stopped him. 

Yuuri grabbed Victor and threw him into the hall, closing the door behind them and locking away that scent. Victor mourned. He wanted to be smothered by it. 

The alpha was a mess. The aroma was still trapped in his lungs. The desire not waning.

He remembered this feeling. He was on the edge of a rut.

He couldn’t live through that again. The pain. The wanting. The loneliness.

Yuuri dragged him into the bathroom all while stopping the alpha from biting both himself and Yuuri. Victor tried to resist. To just let his body do as it wanted. Let the haze blind him. Just put his teeth into his arm and pretend it was Yuuri.

That’s all he wanted! Yuuri!

He tried to beg. And then bargain. But Victor didn’t realize he was speaking his mother tongue. 

The next thing he knew, he was in the shower and water was running over him. He crumpled into his body weight, expecting to collapse hard onto the floor. But there was something soft to catch him there. He looked down to see it was Yuuri. The Japanese man was talking but he couldn’t understand the words. 

He knew they were both getting drenched as a heap on the floor. His clothes clinging heavily onto his skin from wetness. Yuuri’s black hair plastered onto his beautiful face. He wanted to kiss him so much! 

“Victor! Victor! It’s alright! You’re alright!” 

The haze started to lift. His heart still pounded in his chest, making his arms twitch with each violent beat But he was beginning to think clearly.

Yuuri was pushing back wet silver hair from Victor’s face. His touch so tender.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! You’re alright!” What was Yuuri apologizing for?

“я люблю тебя” he whispered, in awe of how beautiful Yuuri was.

“Victor?” 

His mind cleared. He felt like he had just been snapped into his own body from a vague dream.

“What… what did I do? Oh god, Yuuri! What did I do?”

“Nothing! It’s what I did! I’m so sorry! Victor are you alright?”

“I… did I hurt you?” 

“No! Not even close! You tried to hurt yourself.” Victor didn’t know if Yuuri was crying or if was the water from the shower.

“Yuuri, I’m sorry! I’m sorry!" 

“No please don’t apologize, Victor. You did nothing wrong.”

Victor wanted to climb out of the shower and crawl into his room where he could just drown in his shame. But when he moved, Yuuri’s arms wrapped around him.

The omega was trembling. But the embrace was so warm. Victor could feel Yuuri press against him. Fit perfectly against his chest. Their chests building more pressure with the rise and fall of their deep breaths. 

It felt so right. So perfect.

“Please… please…” Yuuri begged at the alpha. Of what, Victor didn’t know. They were more like a mantra than words.

Victor knew he shouldn’t. Not after having acted the way he had. But he wrapped his arms around Yuuri. He savored the feeling of having Yuuri there. Of having Yuuri willingly hold him. One hand rested above shoulder blades while the other encased Yuuri’s waist. His silver head of hair sinking into the crook of Yuuri’s neck, just resting there. He held on tightly.

Not enough to hurt. But enough for Victor to feel the shape of Yuuri’s chest perfectly against his through their wet clothes.

The omega’s neck was right there. The white patches soaked and peering past Yuuri’s shirt. But the water washed away any scent of cardamom.

He couldn’t tell who was shaking now. Was it him? Was it Yuuri? Were both of them just quivering from what had happened? The shear wave of pheromones ebbing but not without leaving an echo in both of their bodies.

“я люблю тебя,” Victor murmured into Yuuri’s neck. 

When their breaths returned to a steady pace, Victor pulled his head back and rested it against the cold tile wall. Yuuri was sitting between his legs and leaning against his chest. With each of Victor’s breaths, the brunette’s body rose and fall. Victor mused that he could cage Yuuri entirely with his own body by wrapping his arms and legs around him. But the omega looked so comfortable.

Yuuri look up.

“Are you… feeling better?” 

“Yes… Thanks to you. Yuuri, I’m so sor…” 

Yuuri’s hand covered Victor’s mouth. Victor wanted to kiss it.

“Please don’t apologize, Victor. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

He gently grabbed Yuuri’s wrist and pulled the hand away. 

“I went rabid again…”

“That… that wasn’t your fault.” 

Yuuri turned pink and it wasn’t from the warm water still pouring down on them. 

“I… I was trying to get rid of the smell from the clothes. I’m sorry.”

Is that where the scent had come from? But how was it both of their scents? And why had it been so potent with arousal?

He cocked his head to the side in confusion. Yuuri’s wrist still in his hand. The other hand reached to Yuuri’s chin.

“I don’t understand…" 

“Last night… I… you know? I had to… When I’m off suppressants I feel… more… ” Yuuri couldn’t say the words. Couldn’t say that he touched himself. Put his fingers inside his body and writhed against them. But he didn’t have to. Victor’s imagination gathered the pieces together. “I did _that_ … to myself…”

 “Oh...”

But why was Victor’s smell there? His mind flashed back to his shirt in the laundry room. It was his shirt that smelled so strongly of the two of them. The scent that they would make if they were lovers.

“Oh! With my…! That’s why?!” It dawned on him what had happened. Victor looked at Yuuri in disbelief. In utter amazement. Yuuri had pleasured himself using his scent.

Victor felt pride swell in his chest. He never cared for how he smelled. Found it too floral for an alpha. But it was his scent that made Yuuri feel desire. That was enough to make him drunk with happiness.

Yuuri wanted to hide away. He started to shrink from Victor’s touch, embarrassed. Victor grabbed on and pulled him in close.

“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have. It was wrong.” He felt humiliated. “It… it must be gross for you. I’m sorry…” 

Victor shoed away those apologies as he held Yuuri’s face. Yuuri did everything he could to avoid Victor’s gaze. But the alpha pulled their faces close. One hand snaked to the back of Yuuri’s head, applying pressure to keep the omega from scooting away. Soft, wet hair slipping between his fingers. 

Their foreheads touched. Water streamed down their faces, trickling down their lashes and into their eyes but Victor didn’t care. He just wanted to be close to Yuuri.

Yuuri didn’t know what Victor was thinking. He was quiet but his actions didn’t seem angry. They were tender to the point that it made him hurt.

He didn’t want to be touched like this. Because it would leave him wanting more. Wanting to be the only one Victor held this way. 

“You’re not upset?” It took every bit of Yuuri’s courage. Wrangling an aroused and strong alpha on the verge of a rut was nothing in comparison to this. That was easy.

“How could I be?”

“Not… disgusted?”

“Oh Yuuri, never.”

Victor wanted to reassure Yuuri. Let him know that he was far from disgusted. He was honored and delighted! Had Yuuri thought of his own hands as Victor’s? The thought made his chest fill with giddiness. But he didn’t know how to say those words without making Yuuri shy away from him. So instead he softly placed a kiss on Yuuri’s cheek. Victor loved how soft Yuuri’s skin was under his mouth.

The omega looked stunned. 

“Yuuri… you always surprise me. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way before.” He pulled Yuuri in and rested his chin on top of the brunette’s head. He expected Yuuri to scurry off but instead, he stayed right there in the ever more intimate embrace. Their clothes were absolutely useless from sitting under the running water. But they stayed like that.

“And… how do you feel?” Victor could hear Yuuri’s embarrassment in the question.

“Hm…?” Victor hummed. Yuuri felt the vibration through their skin.

“Being what I am is making this difficult, isn’t it?”

“Yuuri, is being with an alpha like me frightening?”

“What? No!” Yuuri tried to wrangle free of Victor but the Russian held firm.

“You being an omega isn’t making anything difficult, Yuuri. It’s me… I can’t control myself. I know I should let you go but I don’t want to, Yuuri. I can’t… What should I do, Yuuri?”

This time Yuuri pulled back and Victor didn’t stop him. Brown eyes searching Victor’s face.

“Victor… please never say you’ll let me go.”

“Oh?”

“I don’t want to be anywhere else but here, with Victor.” 

Victor smiled. One that dazzled Yuuri. Like he had offered the man the world.

Victor moved in and kissed Yuuri’s wet forehead. 

“я люблю тебя.” 

I love you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if this was an absolutely silly chapter? I wanted to show how strong Yuuri is. In omegaverse stories, the omega can seem breakable and fragile. But I think even in cannon, Yuuri is so very strong! He has done so many things that are frightening to anyone. He perseveres even with all the anxiety he has. And I think Victor sees that. Victor sees Yuuri for what he is better than anyone. And loves him for it. 
> 
> I'm waxing a great deal of romantic babble at this point! It might be the news of the movie that's getting to me. 
> 
> But thanks so much! I hope you enjoyed it! 
> 
> -DazzledGhosts


	7. The Words

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> And thank you for your continued support! You guys are genuinely too lovely to me!
> 
> This chapter has more pining. And we learn that even off suppressants, Yuuri still has to endure discomfort. There's a panic attack and maybe some more pining. But I promise it'll end with a bang!

Victor’s skin burned and his body felt as though it was lined with lead. The pheromones of an almost rut had wracked him, but not ruined him. Yuuri helped him out of the shower and gently peeled off his clothes. They were wet, heavy, and clung to his flesh painfully. But Yuuri was gentle and patient. Before he knew it, he was in a soft bathrobe. 

Yuuri ushered him out of the bathroom. Yuuri couldn’t leave the room until he had washed with scent blockers and reapplied all of his patches and ointments. Yuuri seemed so isolated and alone when Victor had left him behind.

Yuuri didn’t want to stay back. He wanted to help with the ache in the alpha’s body. He couldn’t know what the pheromones of a rut quite felt like, but he could recall the absolute dredge his body became from heats. What he felt in that moment wasn’t sympathy or pity for Victor. He just didn’t want Victor to feel pain at all. Because Victor was Victor. 

The alpha sat onto his bed, listening to the run of water while Yuuri bathed. He was still a bit dazed. The edges of his body prickled. But the worst part wasn’t his body. It was that he had almost given in to the alpha inside him… Again.

He sat there, his hair dripping wet onto his bed, replaying the events of earlier. 

Yuuri had touched himself because of Victor’s scent. The smell that their pheromones made together was like a nectar on his lips. It’s influence stronger than any wine. He had almost fallen into a rut. Just the memory of their scent as lovers made him want to walk back into the shower and press himself against the brunette. He wanted to kiss Yuuri. If his alpha scent was desirable, he would give it all to Yuuri. 

But would Yuuri want the man that came with it? 

Something soft touched his head. He jerked his head up, still sensitive to any stimulation. 

Yuuri was standing in front of him, a towel in his hands, drying Victor’s wet silver hair. 

“You’ll catch a cold like that…” The words verged on a whisper. 

Yuuri’s hair was slightly damp and his glasses were back on his face. He was only in his pajamas but he was so beautiful that Victor couldn’t quite understand what he had done right in his life to witness this sight.

Yuuri’s shirt was loose and from the edge of the collar peeked out his scent suppressing patches. Victor could count five from the where he was sitting. The brunette’s usually creamy neck and back now had splotches on them from repeated application of the patches. Victor could only imagine how much they stung the omega’s skin. He hated that Yuuri needed to use them. That everything Yuuri had to do hurt him but regardless, he endured silently. 

Victor had expected pain from being touched, but Yuuri massaged his scalp adeptly through the towel. His fingers pressed down in the right places, easing away all of Victor’s tension and pain. It wasn’t too hard or too soft of a touch. Just firm enough to feel good. And god did it feel good. He melted into it.

A rumbling left Victor’s chest. It wasn’t quite a purr or a moan, but something in between. A deep sound of gratification and pleasure.

“Oh…!” Yuuri was surprised and frankly, so was Victor. Yuuri’s hands didn’t leave the alpha’s silver hair, but paused for a moment. Victor had never made such a noise! Not even when in the most intimate of embraces with past lovers. He had given and received his fair share of pleasure. But everything and everyone paled in comparison to Yuuri. 

“My mother use to dry my hair like this when I was younger. She would always scold me for sitting around with wet hair.” His hands moved again. Victor refused to look up, but if had been bold enough he would have seen a smile in a sea of a blush in Yuuri’s face. Victor was thankful that Yuuri didn’t comment on his obscene groan. 

How could Yuuri willingly touch him like this? And so tenderly after Victor had gone feral for the third time? He wanted to take Yuuri’s hands and kiss each palm. He also wanted to push his teeth into Yuuri’s neck but he buried that desire deep in shame. 

“There. All dry!” Yuuri pulled back the towel. Victor was sad it was over. He wanted more. More of Yuuri. But he was surprised again. Yuuri’s fingertips brushed his silver bangs to the side. “Handsome again.” Victor had never been so happy to be called handsome before. 

Could Victor reach out and touch Yuuri? They had been holding one another only moments before. Would it be alright to want more? Here on the surface of his bed, where lovers lie? 

But before he could gather his courage, Yuuri pulled away. 

“You should sleep. You’ll feel better in the morning.” 

“Oh… right…” 

Victor moved himself into the covers.

“Do you want to sleep with Makkachin?”

_ I want to sleep with  _ you _. _

“I think he prefers your bed to mine now…”

“No way! You’re Makkachin’s favorite, Victor!” There was a brief laugh. He was relieved Yuuri could still make that sound. 

Yuuri pulled the covers up and patted them around Victor. It felt oddly familiar. Like Yuuri had done this before. He didn’t know that Yuuri had done the same tender actions while he was sedated in his hospital room. But it seemed his body remembered.

They talked a bit about tomorrow’s plans. About practice. Maybe getting dinner with Yurio. Mundane things that might seem dull to others. 

But Victor was so happy he could have this. And he wanted this forever. Wished he could pull Yuuri into the same bed with him. And not to fuck him. No. Just to keep him close. Wrap his arms around Yuuri and plant kisses on top of his dark head of hair. 

“Good night, Victor. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“ доброй ночи. я люблю тебя”

Goodnight. I love you. 

\--- 

For the most part, Yuuri and Victor settled back into their old routine. The one before Yuuri was an omega and Victor was an alpha. But with a subtle change. There was tension in their interactions. The two of them maintained space between their bodies thinking the other would be bothered by closeness and intimacy–unaware of the sheer longing that was palpable to anyone else around them. 

But there would be moments where Victor would be weak. He would just want to be close. Not even touching… Just to feel Yuuri’s warmth near his skin. It was maddening that Yuuri was close enough to grasp but not his to take. 

Sometimes, they would nestle on the couch at the end of a day, with Makkachin between them and sharing videos on their phones. Victor savored those moments. Their screens were small so he could lean in close without appearing predatory. 

Occasionally he would altogether forget that he was an alpha and that his presence might give Yuuri discomfort. He was that at ease around Yuuri. If the omega had felt any displeasure, he never showed it. 

One night, they were watching one of Yuuri’s first performances. The Russian was always delighted to peek at Yuuri’s past. He loved Yuuri. Both the Yuuri of now and the Yuuri of then. Victor’s arm instinctively wrapped around Yuuri’s back and rested on his shoulders in order to lean closer and see. The moment he felt Yuuri’s warmth, however good it felt, he realized his mistake. But he couldn’t take the gesture back. It would have ruined the facade of comfort and normalcy they had carefully crafted together. 

Yuuri was stiff at first but eventually melted into Victor. The alpha felt his own pulse pound hard to the point he was certain Yuuri could feel it reverberate through their skin. But he wasn’t going to create distance. Not now. Not after wanting this for days.

Where Victor was hard and angular, Yuuri was soft and warm. They fit against one another so well. 

They stayed like that most of the evening. Yuuri even shifted closer and Victor’s hand crept up to the brunette’s hair. He remembered how Yuuri’s hands had massaged his scalp and wondered if he could do the same. But he decided to instead rub a lock of raven hair between his fingers, savoring how soft it was. 

These moments of intimacy were soon peppered through their forced and unnatural distance. 

Sometimes Victor would find fault with how Yuuri tied his ice skates and offer to do it himself. It was really an excuse just to cradle Yuuri’s strong calves between his fingers. He wanted to roll up the omega’s pant leg and trace his shape with his mouth. Other times Yuuri would adjust Victor’s shirts after they would change from practice clothes. Victor was unaware, but Yuuri loved how Victor's chest felt beneath his palms when he smoothed pretend wrinkles away.  

\---

Victor’s affection wanted to bubble out of him. If he couldn’t be wrapped around Yuuri, he would profess his love. Just in a language the omega couldn’t understand. 

“я люблю тебя”

I love you.

The Russian would say it after breakfast. Before leaving their apartment. When no one was in the locker room. In passing one another at the rink. During their walks with Makkachin. At night on the couch. Before they went to bed. And any moment in between.

At this point, Yuuri felt embarrassed to ask what it meant. 

Was it a greeting? A pet name? Was it even intended for Yuuri?

Victor’s blue-green gaze would be on him as the words spilled out earnestly. Undivided attention all on Yuuri. 

“я люблю тебя.”

Each time Yuuri felt so warm. And all he wanted to do was open his mouth and say:

“愛してる”

But Victor already knew enough Japanese. He couldn’t be sly with his affection. The words wanted to barrel out of his mouth in whatever language Yuuri knew. 

He swallowed them and found himself suffocating. Every touch Yuuri gave. Every glance. Every action. All of it held Yuuri’s love. But his mouth was stunned with fear and self doubt. He couldn’t say the words. 

\---

The usually careful and disciplined Victor would occasionally let his pheromones lazily roll around them when they were alone. Yuuri couldn’t figure out why. Or if it was even intentional. The alpha had always suppressed his aroma to the point it had to be uncomfortable. Not that it would ever fade away. It would just be subdued not to bother omegas or other alphas. 

So when Victor would let it sink into the space around them, Yuuri couldn’t interpret the meaning behind it. Sometimes the omega was completely unaware it was happening. Slowly but surely, Yuuri’s clothes would saturate in it. 

Victor knew it was childish. 

But he also knew that Yuuri liked his scent. Had had used it to pleasure himself, hadn’t he? And it wasn’t enough to cause any harm. Yuuri’s skin would stay scentless but the fibers of his clothes would undeniably carry bergamot and rain. He wanted to win Yuuri’s affection. So he would use it as a small reminder. 

_ I’m here. I’m yours. _

And if it also made others think Yuuri was his, well then that was simply just a perk.

\---

Their practices returned to the way they were before Yuuri was an omega. It was almost normal. 

Almost. 

Yurio would send Victor accusatory glares every now and then. It got worse after Yakov patted Yuuri’s back. It was a gesture of praise after Yuuri had beautifully done his routine for his free skate. But a pain filled whimper slipped out of his mouth. Yuuri had been the one to profusely apologize.

Afterwards Yurio asked what was wrong.

“Oh… these patches can be a bit acidic.” 

Yurio immediately stood up. He raised his hand near Yuuri’s collar. 

“Can I?”

Yuuri nodded. The young alpha tugged on shirt. There, between the mosaic of patches was skin that looked bruised and tender. 

Victor fought back his every instinct to shove the smaller alpha onto the floor. But Yuuri didn’t seem bothered. 

“Why didn’t you say anything? This... This looks painful...” The usually rough Yurio was soft in that moment. His words nearly a whisper. 

“It’s not so bad. And I only need to use them for a few more weeks.” That wasn’t reassuring at all. In a few weeks he would return to chemical suppressants that would dull his senses. It seemed at every turn, there was something trying to weigh Yuuri down. 

“Yuuri…” His finger ghosted across Yuuri’s neck in concern. The omega’s skin tensed at the touch. “Sorry…” He shrank away from Yuuri. 

“Don’t apologize, Yurio.” 

He gently patted Yurio’s shoulder and gave him a dazzling smile. An action that was meant to be comforting and reassuring.

It spoke volumes:  _ I’ve done this before. This will pass. Everything will be fine. Thank you for caring about me.  _

Victor watched with absolute envy at how intimate the two of them were in that moment. Their bodies so close that if Yurio leaned in just a bit, they would kiss. Passing secrets in between glances and soft gestures. The alpha in his chest felt predatory.

“I… I have some lotion that might help.” 

“Oh?” 

“I use it for when my skin hurts from growth spurts. You can pick it up after we all have dinner tonight.” There was a touch of pink on Yurio’s face. The young alpha wasn’t use to displaying his concern for others. But the alpha inside Victor saw it as desire.

“Thanks, Yuri. That would be wonderful.”

There was a smile on the blonde’s face. One that he tried to stifle but failed. 

\---

When Yuuri was back on the ice, Yurio turned to Victor.

“Why does he smell like you?”

“Who smells like me?” Victor was grinning. He knew exactly what Yurio was talking about but it felt so satisfying. Like he was getting back at the young alpha for all the intimacy he shared with Yuuri. 

“His clothes reek of you.”

“Oh, that’s not nice, Yurio. I don’t smell bad. Isn’t it preferable to hyacinths?” 

He was being absolutely juvenile and he knew it. 

“At least I don’t smell like old tea and wet dirt.” 

While Yurio’s words were nasty, the tone wasn’t. He had gotten use to Victor’s blatant pining for Yuuri. He also had become aware of Yuuri’s more subtle actions that spoke louder than Victor’s borderline scent marking. When they thought no one was looking, Yuuri would reach out a trembling hand to Victor. Maybe brush the alpha’s silver hair out of his face or use the Russian’s broad chest to steady his balance when adjusting his skates. 

He didn’t trust Victor. But he trusted Yuuri more than anyone else. 

He wanted to be meaner to Victor. But he found that he couldn’t. Yurio would never admit it out loud, but he had always admired Yuuri. Now that he knew Yuuri accomplished everything he had with so much weight on his shoulders, it made him appreciate Yuuri all the more. Of course Victor would feel the same if not more for Yuuri.

_ Were you always this strong? How did I not see it before? _

Yurio wanted to be next to the brunette. To talk to Yuuri and hear what he had to say. He wanted to be close. Not the way Victor did. He wanted Yuuri to brush away all of his insecurities so Yurio could do the same in return. But he wasn’t doing a great job of it and he knew that. So instead, he would unleash all his anger on Victor who rivaled Yurio’s admiration for the Japanese skater. 

“You’re so mean to me, Yurio. You wound me.” On some level, Victor understood. He didn’t know what had transpired between the two of them and was almost afraid to know. When Yurio was sharp, Yuuri was gentle. From what he could tell, it wasn’t sexual. At least for now. But Victor could imagine how what they had would flourish in his absence. The young alpha wasn’t afraid to approach Yuuri and the omega never put up any walls. Whatever they had could easily manifest into love. It was difficult for Victor to watch. 

“Victor… I know what you’re thinking.” 

“Hm?”

“You’re thinking I’m going to take Yuuri away from you.”

“Are you?”

“You’re stupid for even thinking that.”

“What does that mean?”

“I don’t know what he sees in you.”

Yurio hopping on the rink shouting words that could be seen as insults. But each Katsudon and piglet sounded affectionate. 

Victor watched, confused and still envious. 

\---

The three of them decided to eat dinner together. It was a simple restaurant, nothing elaborate like what Victor had originally proposed. Yuuri was still overwhelmed by sound and smells after halting his suppressants so they chose some place quieter. 

Most of the meal was Yurio talking to Yuuri. Victor couldn’t get a word in which was new to him. But it gave him a chance to look at the omega. Yuuri’s mannerisms were so charming. He would sometimes ruffle his own hair when in thought or give a lopsided smile whenever Yurio said something extreme. The best part were Yuuri’s brown eyes. How they sparkled with fondness. It irked Victor that the affection wasn’t for him. But there was something so endearing about that gaze that Victor was willing to accept it in that moment. 

Everything seemed fine.

Until it wasn’t. 

There was a crashing of dishes from the table beside them. A woman collapsed, huddled in a tight ball on the floor. 

A thick scent of vanilla building in the air. 

The smell of a heat. Of an omega.

It was heavy. Yuuri instinctively covered his mouth with his napkin. Heats could set off heats and while off suppressants, it was even more likely.

Yurio did the same. It was suffocating and he was still too young. His body was unsure how to react.

“Yurio, you wait outside.” Victor’s voice wasn’t commanding but it was laced with authority. The young alpha wanted to be proud and endure, but at the same time, he was afraid of being near Yuuri when there was pure arousal in the air. His neck was looking more appealing by the second. 

“Victor, aren’t you coming?” Yurio asked. His voice was muffled through his napkin, but the concern still slipped through.

_ You’ve recently had a rut from just smelling an omega, you should leave too. _

While the scent was everywhere, Victor was unfazed. Yurio eyed the Russian up and down. Not a single trace of reaction to the heat pheromones. 

Victor found the vanilla to be overbearing like burnt sugar on his tongue. 

The omega was certainly beautiful too. Her figure curved and slender, but Victor didn’t even feel the slightest bit of temptation. She wasn’t Yuuri. 

“I’m fine Yura, just go.” 

“But…”

Victor stood up. His body completely void of desire. If anything he was a bit repulsed by it. 

“See? I don’t react to other omegas.” 

Yurio caught what Victor was saying between his words.

_ I only desire Yuuri. _

“Oh my god, honey! I’m so sorry!” a beta rushed to the side of the distressed omega. “I was in the bathroom, I thought your heat wasn’t until next week!” The omega looked relieved. She reached out to her mate. The two of them apologized to everyone around them and quickly left. 

Yurio felt immediate relief once the couple left. He tossed his napkin down onto the table. 

“Well that’s one way to end the night,” he huffed. 

Yuuri on the other hand was pale. His fist still clenched the napkin until his knuckles turned white, almost suffocating himself.

“Yuuri, Yuuri it’s alright.” Victor didn’t like how rigid Yuuri was. It was frightening him. 

“Katsudon?”

Yuuri was terrified. Going into a heat while unmated in public was his greatest fear. His body acting independently, full of ache and void, spilling out pheromones. Slick pooling down his thighs. But none of that compared to the thought of someone mounting him. Marking him. The thought of any gaze beyond blue-green on him was repulsing. Only those elegant, pale hands. That heart shaped mouth. 

He didn’t seem to be reacting. But he couldn’t chance it. Not when he was close to some semblance of normalcy.

“Yuuri, you need to breathe,” Victor was next to him. “It’s alright. I won’t hurt you.” His large hands lifted Yuuri out of his chair. The Russian tossed a wad of cash on the table and pushed Yuuri out of the restaurant. Even when standing in the chilled night air, Yuuri was afraid to breathe. 

“Yuuri… It’s ok.”

“He’s smothering himself, do something old man!” 

“You’re safe, Yuuri. I won’t let anything hurt you.” He moved to grab Yuuri’s hands away from his mouth. 

Yuuri pulled back violently. 

“Shh… it’s alright.” Victor approached again, but slower. This time his hands went for Yuuri’s face and not his hands. The omega didn’t recoil. Mostly because the edges of his vision were becoming hazy. “Yuuri, look at me.” 

His wide brown eyes settled onto Victor’s face. 

“That’s right…” he brushed Yuuri’s bangs to the side. “You’re not going into heat.” 

Yuuri looked at him with doubt. 

It said: “How do you know?”

“If you were, I would be in a rut instantly, Yuuri. As you can see, I’m fine.” It went unnoticed by both the alpha and omega but not to Yurio. What Victor had admitted was colossal. 

Victor pulled Yuuri in close, rubbing comforting circles into his shoulders. Yuuri trembled, but finally let Victor pull the cloth away from his face. “That’s it… deep breaths.” 

The omega gasped for air. 

“See…? No rut. No heat.”

“But… I don’t…”

“That’s good, Yuuri. Keep breathing.” He let his scent roll off him. It was void of arousal. Victor used it to drive his point further. He rained praise onto Yuuri. It seemed to soothe him. “You’re doing great. It’s alright.” Yuuri was melting into him.

It was a sight that Yurio didn’t know what to do with. He was relieved that Yuuri was calming down but also alarmed at how intimate the two were. It wasn’t an emotion born out of envy. Yuuri’s neck was so close to Victor’s mouth. 

But Yuuri had asked him for his trust. So he decided not to intervene unless Victor’s teeth were bared. 

“Victor?” Yuuri was a bit dazed. The alpha gave him a reassuring squeeze. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to…”

“You did nothing wrong.” 

“I made a mess…”

“No one thinks that.”

Yurio took that as his que to chime in. 

“Katsudon, you’re overreacting. No one was to blame for this.” 

Yuuri gave Yurio a dazzling smile. It perked up the blond and he almost flitted to Yuuri’s side. Victor would have usually felt threatened, but Yuuri was in his arms and felt like his in that moment. Instead, he had amusement at the usually stoic Yurio’s awkward concern. 

“You should rest… My apartment’s closer. We can go there.” 

\---

Yurio unlocked the door to his apartment. Victor was almost knocked upside the head by the young alpha’s scent. It was floral. And so was his own. Victor was worried that Yuuri would find this favorable to his own bergamot and rain. In his mind, it was his saving grace.  _ Yuuri likes how  _ I  _ smell.  _ His initial reaction was to stop Yuuri from going inside. But Yuuri crossed the threshold and seemed unfazed. 

Yurio tossed his belongings to a corner in the doorway and motioned for them to come in. 

“I’ll grab you that lotion I mentioned earlier for your back. You guys just sit wherever.” 

Yuuri and Victor sat on the couch. Close but not enough to touch. 

Yurio’s ragdoll cat hopped up next to Yuuri. He gingerly placed a paw on the brunette’s thigh.

“Aww, I missed you too, Potya.” 

He carefully let the cat sniff him. There was a slight quiver to Yuuri’s motions. He was still shocked. But the ragdoll curled onto his lap. 

Yurio came out with of his room with the lotion in hand. He saw his cat happily settled on Yuuri. 

“I’ve never seen Potya cozy up to anyone so fast.” 

“He did sleep next to us the night I stayed over.”

The word ‘us’ did not go unnoticed to Victor. It was another reminder that the Yuri’s shared a bed in his absence. 

Yurio put down the lotion on the coffee table and kneeled on the floor next to Yuuri. He propped his arm up on the couch, leaned his head against it and scratched Potya on the nose. It purred loudly. 

Victor wanted to grab Yuuri and pull him in close. Yurio’s hands, while petting the cat, were too close.

“я люблю тебя” Yurio said happily when the cat lifted its face and bumped it into Yurio’s. 

“Yurio… what… what does that mean?” 

Victor froze. 

“What? я люблю тебя?” 

“Yes.”

“Yurio… wait…” Victor’s heart was racing.

“It means…”

“Yura… don’t...” 

“... I love you.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does that count as a cliffhanger?
> 
> I like to think that Victor is absolutely head over heels for Yuuri. And more than just how an alpha feels for an omega. Even in the cannon, Victor's glowing when he's beside Yuuri. 
> 
> This chapter was a small redemption for Victor. He doesn't feel anything for anyone else. Not even another omega whose pheromones are intensified by heat. And not only is he unaffected, but he soothes Yuuri out of a panic attack. Yuuri's pulled Victor out of a dark place twice before. And now it was his chance to do the same. 
> 
> Oh dear, I'm rambling again! I just really like these two lovebirds.


	8. The Perfume

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for putting up with that last cliffhanger. And for all the wonderfully kind comments. You've no idea how much I smile when I read them! 
> 
> This chapter turned out to be longer and really hard to write. I wanted it to be perfect but it never came out quite right. But our two lovebirds finally get to talk! Sometimes they're very good at communicating, other times they're rubbish at it. 
> 
> Be prepared for yearning, a little bit of satisfaction, some action and a lot more yearning. 
> 
> Thanks again for reading!

“It means…”

“Yura… don’t...” 

“... I love you.” 

Victor’s body hardened. A chill spread through his chest. He didn’t know whether to bolt or stay. His heart thrumming loudly in his ears. All of his secret confessions revealed. Every single “I love you” hidden in Russian now come to light. He kept his gaze firmly on Yurio, afraid to see how the omega beside him was reacting. Yurio was completely unaware of what he had just done, still petting his cat affectionately. 

And then there was Yuuri. Yuuri who was stunned to the point that he was afraid to breathe. Could it be true? Were those words for him? How could it be? Yuuri thought he paled in comparison to Victor. And if it was somehow possible... then had Yuuri been holding back his own love for no reason this whole time? He had to know! He had to quickly release this affection out of his body. The words for Victor were trapped in his lungs and needed to escape. 

_ I love you too. _

“Victor…”

“I’m sorry, Yurio, I have to go.” Victor stood up tall. 

“You just got here?”

“I… I forgot something…”

“Victor, wait…” Yuuri tried to move but Yurio’s cat was firmly planted on his thighs. 

“I’ll see you at the rink tomorrow, Yurio.” He was furious. Partially at Yurio but mostly at himself. He had wanted to say those words to Yuuri. He dreamt of holding Yuuri’s face with his hands, close enough to almost be a kiss. Then he would say it. Let his lips brush against Yuuri’s as the words left his mouth. But he was a coward through and through. He hid it in his mother tongue. And now he was running away. 

Victor was already in the hall putting his shoes back on. 

“Yuri… thank you so much for the lotion. I have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Yuuri was scrambling to catch up to Victor. 

The blond grabbed Yuuri’s shoulder from behind.

“Wait… is everything ok?” Yurio didn’t know what had just happened. Everything seemed fine until it wasn’t. 

Yuuri gave him a lopsided smile but his eyes weren’t convincing. 

“I hope so…” His voice was quivering. Yurio could feel the omega’s pulse through his grasp. Was Yuuri scared? The brunette tried to go after Victor but Yurio’s grip became firm.

“What’s happening, Katsudon?"

“I… I don’t know. But I have to find out, Yuri. Thank you so much. I’ll be alright.”

Yurio was afraid to let him go. He was going to protest. Victor had been acting strangely that evening. No… he had been acting strangely ever since he learned Yuuri was an omega. And Yurio was afraid… afraid of what had become of his own mother. Afraid of what could happen to Yuuri. Some actions could never be taken back. Their consequences dire and forever. 

But before he could say anything, he felt warm arms around him. Yuuri was embracing him. He had never felt so safe. So wanted and cared for. 

“Thank you so much, Yuri.” Yuuri’s breath was hot next to his ear. He had never been thanked so earnestly. 

“I… I didn’t do anything.”

“I have to go now…”

And just like that, the warmth was gone. Yuuri was rushing to throw his coat over his shoulders and shove his shoes on. Victor had already left the apartment, leaving behind only his rain and bergamot scent. 

“Please… please be careful.”

This time Yuuri’s smile reached his eyes. 

“I will. Thank you, Yurio. Goodnight!”

And Yuuri was out the door, running. He didn’t bother with the elevator. Just bolted down the stairs and out the doors to the cold night air. There was no Victor in sight. But that didn’t stop him. He ran, feeling the sting of the cold in his lungs. 

He had to find Victor. 

\---

Victor was walking with large and rapid strides. He had to get home. But then again, Yuuri would be there eventually, wouldn’t he? 

And how would he face the omega? Should he just play it off as a jest? Or reduce his affection to a platonic facade? Could he even pretend to see Yuuri that way? 

“Victor! Victor, wait! Please!”

God, he loved how Yuuri would always say his name. Even now when it was desperate and short of breath. 

But the alpha didn’t wait. He just quickened his pace. 

“Please…”

It was hard not stopping. He always wanted to be close to Yuuri. And the pleading he heard in Yuuri’s voice was tearing at the edges of his heart. But the fear was too strong. What if Yuuri rejected him? Turned away all of his affection? He knew Yuuri would let him down gently. But nevertheless, he couldn’t bear it. 

Yuuri’s running steps were getting closer. He resented that Yuuri was an athlete in that moment. 

“Ah!” Yuuri’s legs were uncoordinated with anticipation and doubt. His shoes caught on the ledge of broken concrete and he went tumbling down, landing on his palms painfully. 

Victor heard the crumple of the omega’s body and finally came to a halt. But he did not turn around. 

Yuuri’s Japanese mannerisms slipped through as he said “Ite” over and over to his freshly bleeding palms. 

Broken skin… All the patches and ointments can’t stop the scent of an omega from peeking through blood. 

Amidst metal was gentle cardamom and fresh honeysuckle. Victor knew he should leave. That scent had been his undoing so many times.

“What’s that smell… it smells so good. Is that an omega?” Victor could hear voices from not too far. If he could smell Yuuri, so could anyone else. “I’ve never smelled an omega like that before.”

He finally gave in and turned around to look at Yuuri. 

The omega was stunning as always. Face flushed from running and mouth parted beautifully from panting. His hands were scraped and bloodied but not as badly as his knee. His pant leg was torn and stained red. 

“If I find that omega, I’m gonna fill it up to the brim with my cum.”

“Not if I get there first.”

The voices were closer now. The words were in Russian so Yuuri couldn’t understand. But Victor was furious anyone could speak so crudely about Yuuri. He stomped his way to Yuuri, bent down and pulled him up. 

“Victor…”

But the alpha didn’t respond. Just dragged Yuuri with him while letting his pheromones seep into the air around them. He didn’t want anyone else to smell Yuuri. 

“Shit… Smells like we were beaten to the omega.”

“What a shame… I was gonna impregnate it.”

Victor’s pace quickened and his scent began to permeate everything angrily. In the past, he never believed that Alphas were inherently aggressive. But these past weeks painted a different picture for him. He had given into every primal urge. Even now, letting his pheromones pulse violently as a challenge to anyone who would dare approach him and Yuuri. His hand was gripping Yuuri’s tightly, unknowingly his scent mingled with Yuuri’s. The intensity and proximity of his pheromones marking the omega’s wrist gland. Something Yuuri was acutely aware of.

“Victor… please wait…”

He couldn’t. His alpha was screaming to hide Yuuri. To drag him away and just finally make the omega his. But then he would be just like those other alphas. 

Yuuri realized they were heading towards their apartment. That Victor wasn’t going to stop or talk until they were home. So he let himself be dragged. 

The walk seemed to last forever. Both of their hearts pounded loudly in their ears, swearing the other could hear. When they finally made it to through the door, Victor let go and marched towards his room.

“Victor, please! Just talk to me!”

He was already down the hall.

“Please… please…”

His hand was on the door.

“Did you mean it?”

Of course he had. Every time, every word, every enunciation. And that’s why he was afraid of hearing Yuuri’s rejection. 

He was unaware to Yuuri’s sheer disbelief at the idea that Victor Nikiforov, the man who had been the center of his world for so long, could love him. Yuuri who saw himself as a dime in a dozen figure skater. An omega that was dull and lackluster for the attentions of any alpha or beta, let alone Victor.

“Yuuri… I can’t…” His heart couldn’t bear the tragedy of not having Yuuri’s love. 

Victor started to turn the handle. 

“ 愛してる.”

_ Aishiteru _

And then he stopped. 

Did he hear right?

“愛してる. 愛してる. 愛してる...”

Over and over again. 

Victor knew the weight of those words. They were not said easily, especially not by Yuuri. Words reserved only for the most sincere of lovers. His heart drummed loud. 

He looked back. Yuuri’s face was stained in tears. Large drops spilling down his cheeks. His nose a bit runny and his hair askew from all the running. 

Yuuri was beautiful.

But Victor couldn’t bring himself to move. 

“Say something... Anything!” Yuuri’s scent was steeped with anxiety. Victor could taste it in the back of his mouth. Less Like honeysuckle and more like the salted cherry blossom treats they shared back in Japan. 

“You… you shouldn’t, Yuuri…”

“Shouldn’t what?” 

“Shouldn’t want me… I’m just like all those other alphas, Yuuri. You didn’t hear what they were saying when we were outside. What they wanted to do. But I’m just the same, Yuuri… I’m no good.”

“Victor, how could you think that? I could search the whole world. Nobody is better than you!”

And that was enough. Silent tears streaming down Victor’s face. 

He couldn’t stand the distance. Not anymore. He practically ran towards Yuuri, wrapping himself around the omega. One arm sinking into Yuuri’s waist, one hand cradling Yuuri’s head. Yuuri’s own arms snaking up his back and clenching the fabric above the alpha’s shoulder blades.

Their aromas mixing. The sweetest nectar on their lips. 

“I should let you go…” he whispered into Yuuri’s neck. 

“You promised me you would let me stay beside you…” 

Victor pulled away but only so he could look into the brunette’s face. Yuuri’s skin was painted with blush, from his face down to his neck and ears. 

“I love you, Yuuri.”

Yuuri’s brown eyes widened. Pupils dancing across Victor’s face, trying to decipher if this moment was real or not. He had been terrified that perhaps he had misheard Victor this whole time. That the words weren’t for him. Tears trickling down Yuuri’s face gently, unlike his earlier panicked sobs. 

Victor pulled off Yuuri’s glasses, dipping in close and planting butterfly kisses on Yuuri’s eyes. His tears salty but floral. The touch felt electric to them both. 

“I love you, Victor.” Yuuri’s hands were on Victor’s neck, pulling him in closer. A touch that was soft and unmistakably Yuuri. The alpha’s heart soared. How was it possible to be this happy? 

They were so close. 

Foreheads press against one another. Eyes fluttering. 

Cardamom and bergamot like sweetened tea. Honeysuckle and rain like early spring. Victor wanted this more than anything. 

And he frightened himself. 

“Yuuri… Yuuri I shouldn’t. I could hurt you…”

“No.. please…”

He tried to let Yuuri go but found himself gripping tighter. Sharing the same breath now. 

“Yuuri… it’s hard to control myself… I can’t for much longer.” Victor’s words were velvet with desire. 

“Just a little bit longer…” 

Lips pressed against lips. Who kissed who was a mystery. 

Yuuri was soft and full. Willing and accepting.

Victor’s alpha roared to life. 

_ His throat is close. Plant kisses down his jawline and down to his neck. He won’t know your intentions. Sink your teeth in. Take him. He isn’t resisting.  _

Yuuri’s mouth parted ever so slightly under the pressure of Victor’s lips. Victor knew he had to pull away but such an invitation was hard to resist. So he slid his lips against Yuuri’s. Tilted his head and planted pecks on those rosey pillows. 

_ Make him yours. _

Heart pounding. Victor was getting tunnel vision. He knew this could slide easily into a rut. 

He moaned into Yuuri’s mouth. There was so much more he wanted to do. But he pulled away.

A whimper fled unwillingly from the omega’s throat. It made Victor’s resolve tremble. 

Yuuri wanted more. Victor’s mouth was hot to touch. 

“Yuuri… I’m serious. I can’t stop myself. I’m going to hurt you.”

“You’ve never hurt me.”

“And I want to keep it that way, please.” 

They made space between their bodies but that didn’t mean they ceased touch. Yuuri’s hand was gripping Victor’s sleeve. 

“You’re so beautiful, Yuuri… I don’t deserve you.”

He didn’t think Yuuri could turn a deeper shade of red. Yuuri tried to bury his face into Victor’s chest but the Russian held him back. 

“I mean it, Yuuri. You can still walk out of this. I’m not the alpha I thought I was. I don’t want you to be afraid of me.”

“Victor, have I done anything to make you feel that way? Please… I don’t want you to think that I’m afraid of you.” Yuuri’s hold on Victor’s sleeve tightened. 

Victor felt so selfish! Of course Yuuri would carry the blame onto his own shoulders. Always so full of doubt.  

“Yuuri… never…”

“Then why do you think I would want to walk away from  _ you _ ? If anything…  _ I _ should be offering the way out to  _ you _ .”

“If you knew what my inner alpha wanted, you would want to run away from me. Oh Yuuri… the things it wants…”

Yuuri was quiet. Awkwardly shifting his weight on the balls of his feet. 

“Even now… it’s so hard not marking you.” Without realizing, he placed his hand on the crook of Yuuri’s neck, right where an alpha’s teeth would sink. There was cloth and patches in between his fingers and Yuuri’s skin. 

“I trust you more than anyone, Victor. I love you…” Yuuri could sometimes be so full of doubt and anxiety. But his words carried nothing but confidence. With every fiber of his being, he believed and loved Victor.

Victor took Yuuri’s hand in his, raised it to his mouth and planted a kiss on the golden ring nestled there. 

Yuuri flinched. Victor would have read that as rejection but he remembered that Yuuri’s skin was raw from his earlier fall.

“Let’s get you bandaged up.” 

\---

Yuuri bathed and applied all his scent blockers. He was mournful that Victor’s pheromones rubbed off under the water. 

Was this real? Had he dreamt this entire moment? Victor’s mouth was on his mouth. He had said he loved Yuuri. The memory brought a smile to his lips. Yuuri had felt happiness before but this was different. This was so profound and fulfilling. The charming but ever childish Victor Nikiforov loved him. He was the most beautiful being Yuuri had known. Not because of how insanely gorgeous he was. But because Victor was perhaps the most dedicated, kind, impulsive, whirlwind of a human he had ever met.

When the shower was over, Victor joined Yuuri in his room and applied ointment to the omega’s wounds. Yuuri tried to protest and do it on his own, but Victor wanted to do this. Even if he was clumsy with the bandages. Yuuri’s knee ended up a mosaic of bandaids. Victor was awkward and nervous but mostly brimming with childish excitement. 

Yuuri loved him. His Yuuri. Absolutely dazzling, nervous, beautiful, soft, and earnest Yuuri. Winning all the medals in the world couldn’t even give him a fraction of this emotion.

If only Yuuri could be his always.

The alpha was a bit sad that Yuuri no longer smelled of him. His long, slender fingers lingered on Yuuri’s wrist while he dabbed at scrapes on those smaller hands with iodine. His thumb absentmindedly rubbed the gland. 

That made them both quiver. 

“Sorry…” Victor murmured and he went to pack up the first aid kit.

“No… it’s… it’s alright. If you… you want to…” Yuuri didn’t know how to say the words. 

“Oh…?”

“I… I like… smelling like you.” Yuuri hid his face in his hand. He didn’t know how Victor would interpret that. Was it needy? Did Victor even want that? “Only if you want to,” he added in a hurry. 

He was so unaware that Victor wanted that very much. If Yuuri couldn’t smell of himself, then Victor wanted the omega to smell of him. 

Victor pulled Yuuri’s hand out of his face. The brunette’s embarrassment looked so beautiful on his face. 

He sat down on the bed next to Yuuri. 

“Are… are you sure?”

Yuuri nodded.

“It’s not too floral for an alpha?” Victor would never admit it, but he was always slightly insecure about his scent. 

The omega hummed a no. 

“How was it that Yurio described it? Old tea and grannies?” Victor laughed as he took Yuuri’s wrists in his hands. The alpha slowly let his pheromones roll off him, not to startle Yuuri or trigger a heat. 

His control was always so impeccable, but it was hard not to just give in and let it pour into the omega. Victor’s alpha wanted the deepest parts of Yuuri to be steeped in bergamot and rain. Places that were so intimate and hidden. But instead he was precise, only letting his scent rest on Yuuri’s wrist glands, right above his pulse. 

“I think it smells gentle and safe.” Yuuri’s eyes were closed while he breathed in deeply. “But also refreshing like when it’s just about to rain.” He added the last part with a satisfied smile as Victor rubbed his own glands against Yuuri’s. Victor wanted that smile to stay there always. “But mostly I like it… because it’s what Victor smells like.” 

Victor felt absolutely giddy, like a child being praised. He never imagined Yuuri would let Victor scent his wrists.

He wanted more. 

“Can I…?” Victor asked, touching Yuuri’s neck. The omega nodded. 

Victor wrapped his arms around Yuuri and sighed. He nuzzled Yuuri’s skin, where there were no patches. Slowly his aroma sank into Yuuri’s neck. 

It was so much easier being intimate when he couldn’t smell Yuuri. The desire to devour the omega was still there. But he could control it. 

Even if it was utterly frustrating. His discomfort was nothing if Yuuri was happy. 

Victor’s grip slackened and he started to part from Yuuri.

“All of it?” Yuuri asked. 

Victor bit back an excited groan. He was weak to a demanding Yuuri. 

“You don’t mind?” 

“Not if you don’t…”

Victor eased Yuuri onto his back. The two of their bodies nestled in the bed made Victor buzz with excitement. He over lapped his body onto Yuuri’s completely. He knew he must be heavy with his larger body but it was the only way to scent completely.

Yuuri savored the weight of Victor's body down against his own

Victor resisted grinding himself against Yuuri. Instead he covered Yuuri with his scent. He couldn’t see Yuuri’s face but he could feel the brunette’s hands against his back, pushing him down deeper into the mattress, and consequently, deeper onto Yuuri. 

Victor wanted so much more. But Yuuri was so trusting in that moment. Absolutely convinced that Victor wouldn’t tear away at those patches and bite down. They stayed in that embrace until they both unknowingly sank into the bed and fell asleep from exhaustion. 

\---

Victor woke up feeling so safe and wanted. So comfortable. He squirmed and held tighter to his bed sheets. 

But those weren’t bed sheets that his arm draped over. 

He opened his eyes to see the side of Yuuri’s face. The omega was sleeping with such deep, restful breaths. His torso rose softly up and down. Victor could feel the movement of each breath considering that his head was planted right on Yuuri’s chest. 

He was using Yuuri as a pillow. 

He felt guilty. Victor’s body was larger and heavier than Yuuri’s. 

Pheromones were exhausting things. Victor had used his in excess to ward off other alphas and then again to scent Yuuri. He must have fallen asleep without realizing it. 

Yuuri’s body and demeanor were just that soft and welcoming. 

Then he noticed one of Yuuri’s arms was wrapped around Victor. The other was right in his line of vision, resting on Yuuri’s own chest. 

Victor felt so completely loved. Was this what Yurio had felt after sharing a bed with Yuuri? That sense of wholeness? Of belonging? Is that why he clung to Yuuri? Or was it how Yuuri talked? So understanding and patient. 

He didn’t seem so angry when he thought about the young alpha. Not now that Yuuri smelled of him. 

And then he remembered… Yuuri loved him! It brought a big goofy grin to his face and he felt the need to express his excitement. He tightened his hold on Yuuri and burrowed his face into the omega’s body. 

It must have been too tight. Yuuri mumbled something and then patted Victor’s head and sank deeper into sleep. 

How precious!

The alpha decided to just keep watching Yuuri. The brunette looked even younger when asleep. No trace of worry or self doubt. Thick eyelashes fluttering from whatever it was the omega dreamt of.

Victor wanted to wake up to this every morning.

\---

When Yuuri had woken up he was completely embarrassed. He felt silly for keeping Victor beside him the whole night. And when he remembered how bold he had been, asking Victor to scent him completely, it made his chest feel tight. It must have exhausted Victor. Yuuri had tried to apologize but Victor hushed him with coffee. 

Each time they got close, Victor was reminded that Yuuri had his scent now. He let Yuuri know by breathing in deeply and giving him a knowing smile.

This lasted until they arrived at the rink to practice. 

Yurio immediately was beside Yuuri. One whiff and he knew Victor had done something. He looked at Victor incredulously. 

_ What did you do? _

But Yuuri didn’t seem upset. He was happy, if anything. 

Victor liked how the tides were turned now. How his intimacy with Yuuri seemed greater. He would sneak up behind Yuuri and surprise him with an embrace on the ice, right in front of the blond alpha. Boasting. Yuuri would get flustered but wouldn’t protest. Yurio glared and did nothing more. 

\---

Practice was over. The two Yuri’s were outside now, sitting on a bench. Victor was still inside talking to Yakov, so it was just the two of them.

“Is everything ok?” Yuuri smelled so strongly of Victor, that if Yurio closed his eyes it was as though the older alpha was beside him. But there was no wound on the omega’s neck. No indication of claiming or marking. That gave him some relief. 

“I’m sorry we rushed out last night, Yuri. Everything’s fine. How about you come over for dinner as an apology?” Yuuri’s smile made the young alpha believe his words. If Yuuri was alright, he would trust him.

Yuuri was always honest. But more than that, Yuuri was always strong. 

“You don’t have to…” It felt strange for Yurio to encroach on Victor and Yuuri’s space. Especially after how Victor had practically flaunted his closeness to Yuuri today. 

“I like spending time with you, Yuri. And Makkachin misses you too.” Yurio gave in. He would never admit it, but he liked spending time with Yuuri and Victor, even if they were both sometimes incredibly frustrating. 

“Is this your omega, boy?” 

Both Yuris jumped at the voice. Yuuri looked up to see the alpha that had previously attacked him. The one that Victor had lunged at. He still had bruises on his face. 

They both stood up immediately. 

“Your omega doesn’t know his place.” 

“Back off!” Yurio’s voice became jagged and deep immediately. 

“But... He doesn’t smell like you… Have you been sharing him?” Yurio didn’t like how this man was speaking about Yuuri. It was like Yuuri was a thing to play with and then dispose. He spoke about the omega as though he wasn’t even there to hear the crude remarks. “Will you share him with me?” Yurio felt sick.

The alpha flashed a knife at them. 

“Fuck off!”

“I don’t like your tone, runt. Why don’t I teach you a lesson before I fuck that pretty omega of yours in front of you?” The knife was now poised to strike. Yurio was stunned by the sight of it. 

Yuuri stretched out his arm in front of Yurio. 

“Your problem isn’t with him. It’s with me. Leave him out of this.” 

Yurio gave the omega a look.  _ What are you doing?! _

“I’ll let the boy go if you bend over prettily for me.” The alpha grabbed Yuuri’s collar and yanked him close. “Spread your legs like an omega should. Or maybe put my cock in that pink mouth of yours? Maybe then I’ll forgive you.” 

Yuuri wanted to gag. Even through clothes, the man’s touch was clammy and foul. 

“I’ll sink my teeth into that pretty neck of yours. That’s what you want isn’t it?”

The words seemed to trigger Yurio. His whole life had been built around an alpha and omega that were paired but did not want to be. The thought of Yuuri bound to a man like this horrified him. He reacted purely out of instinct, charging even though he was smaller. The alpha pulled his blade down, aimed right at Yurio’s face. It flashed in the light, blinding Yurio with fear.

But the knife never met its target. The young alpha looked up to find the blade sinking into Yuuri’s hand. Blood pooled from the gaps between his fingers. 

“Don’t touch him,” Yuuri hissed. Yuuri had been polite until now, afraid of riling up the alpha. But that all vanished the moment the man threatened Yuri. 

Honeysuckle and cardamom filled the air as blood trickled down Yuuri’s wrist. 

“Yuuri!” Yurio was horrified. 

The man and Yuuri struggled against one another. One hand still on the handle of the blade, the other knotted in Yuuri’s hair, trying to make the omega bear his neck. His mouth was open, drool spilling as he tried to snap his teeth at Yuuri’s flesh. The nameless alpha let his musk spill onto the omega in an attempt to subdue. It prickled Yuuri’s eyes and filled his throat. But it only made Yuuri’s resolve stronger. He gripped the blade even tighter and yanked it out of the alpha’s grasp. His attacker was momentarily stunned in disbelief and confusion. 

How could an omega resist let alone fight back?

He was unaware that last time their struggle wasn’t an even match. Yuuri had been suffering from the overdose of his suppressants. His world had been spinning from his vertigo. But now his back was poised straight and tall. Every bit of his body strong and resilient. 

With all his wrath, Yuuri made a fist and aimed it right at the alpha’s neck. He punched the man in the throat. The alpha gasped and tumbled backwards. The blow wasn’t fatal but enough to free himself. Yuuri took this as his chance to deal the final blow. His legs were those of a skater, strength in every fiber and tendon. He slammed his heel deep into the alpha’s stomach who was now a complete mess. 

Yuuri knew he didn’t have too much time. He grabbed the fear paralyzed Yurio, not realizing he was covering the alpha in blood, and ran back into the rink where there were people. They burst inside, startling Victor and Yakov. 

Even with distance, Victor could smell something was wrong. He could smell Yuuri’s cardamom and honeysuckle which in of itself meant something had gone awry. It was stained with pain, fear, and rage, making Victor’s breath erratic. Yurio’s hyacinths were heavier and richer, like an alpha trying to defend itself. None of it compared to the scent of a foul musk that was covering Yuuri where Victor’s own use to be. 

He stopped mid sentence with Yakov and rushed to the Yuris. They were both covered in blood. His heart sank. 

“What… what happened?” Yakov was shouting.

“That… that alpha that attacked Yuuri. He’s back! He has a knife!” 

“I’ll call the cops immediately. You stay here while I lock the doors.” Yakov was the only one with enough wits to react.

“Whose blood is that?” Victor was shaking.

“It’s Yuuri’s. He… he protected me.” Yurio’s pride was a bit wounded. Not because he was an alpha defended by an omega. But because he had been so stunned and failed to protect his friend. When the moment came, he wasn’t able to do anything. “I… I couldn’t do anything.”

“Yuuri.”

“It’s alright… it’s not that deep.” 

“I’m going to kill him.” 

“No… Please…” Yuuri put his hands against Victor’s chest, unaware that he was leaving behind bloody fingerprints on the Russian’s shirt. 

“Yuuri already beat the shit out of him.” 

Victor could only see red. 

“I’m going to tear his throat off.” Victor was almost snarling. 

But Yuuri only wanted Victor to stay close. To console him and comfort him. To replace the wretched stench left behind on his skin.

“Please don’t go. I… I can’t stand his smell… Victor, please.” Yuuri almost whined. The fear was finally catching up to him. He had reacted on pure adrenaline, not wanting Yurio to get hurt. But the reality was crashing down on him fast. The pain seared in his palm. None of that compared to the smell of the other alpha mingling with his own.

That gave Victor clarity.

“Oh Yuuri… Yuuri of course.” 

He collected the omega in his arms. Yuuri rested his head into the crook of Victor’s neck, breathing deeply. Victor gave him soothing rubs on his back, letting his scent spill in comforting waves. Yuuri’s body trembled as he held back tears. 

Yuuri felt dirty with the other alpha’s smell on him. It was like an oily, slick residue left on his flesh. 

“Please… please…” he didn’t even know what he was pleading for. 

“я люблю тебя,” Victor murmured out of habit. It calmed Yuuri. Grounded him. “Shhh…” he soothed. 

Yurio’s jaw dropped. What had Victor just said? 

“I called the police. They’re on their way.” Yakov was back. He wasn’t sure what to make of the scene in front of him. He could understand the bloodied mess the two Yuris were when the rushed in, but not the tight embrace that Yuuri and Victor were in. “How did you two get away?”

“Yuuri grabbed the knife out his hand and straight up punched him in the neck. Then he kicked the alpha right in the gut.” 

Victor planted a kiss right on Yuuri’s temple. He wasn’t even aware he was doing it right in front of the beta and young alpha. He was still scared and enraged but also relieved that Yuuri was safe. That Yuuri was back in his arms. A paradox of emotions. 

Once the musk of the alpha was replaced with Victor’s more floral scent, Yuuri felt himself calming down. He peeked his head from under Victor’s embrace.

“Yurio, you’re not hurt are you?” 

“No… no you didn’t let him touch me.”

Yuuri released a deep sigh. Tears threatened to spill. 

“Oh… I’m so glad… that you’re safe,” he hiccuped. Yuuri stretched out his arm to Yurio. It was an offer of an embrace. Of sharing the moment between the omega and older alpha with him. Yurio wanted to decline. He wasn’t sure if he had a place there. He was an outsider. But Victor opened up the embrace to welcome the blond. “Please?” the omega asked. 

Yurio caved. He bolted into them both, wrapping his arms around Yuuri. 

“I’m so happy you’re not hurt,” Yuuri’s voice quivered with relief. The hug was so tight that it almost hurt Yurio. But that’s what he needed. He needed to feel like he was safe and belonged and Yuuri was so adept at giving him just that. He could tell that Victor was also relieved. While the alpha’s grasp was mostly on Yuuri, his arm still rested on Yurio’s shoulder, reassuring him.

Almost like he was saying:  _ Thank you for trying to defend Yuuri. Thank you for being here now. _

The whole idea of hugging these two seemed absurd to him. It clashed with the image he had created for himself. He wondered what sort of odd image the three of them made. 

“Remind me to never anger you, Katsudon.” 

That gave Yuuri a laugh. One that he needed dearly. Both alpha’s felt the omega’s body quiver in laughter. It made them smile.

“Oh?” Victor hummed. He nuzzled his face against Yuuri’s dark hair, making sure that the last lingering scent of the other alpha faded.

“He sent the alpha flying. He’s going to struggle to breathe for the next forever.” 

Victor wished the alpha would never live for another breath. But he kept that grim thought to himself. 

“Thanks, Katsudon…” it was hard for Yurio to express his gratitude. He had wished that he didn’t have to. That the man who attacked Yuuri never even entered their lives and said those repulsive words to Yuuri. 

They weren’t intended for Yurio but still they left behind a sting. How did it feel for Yuuri? 

How much more did the omega need to bear? How much had be endured before they even knew him? And how could be still be strong despite it all? He shrugged off everything that came his way, as if it was normal. 

All these thoughts spiraled in the minds of both alphas.  

_ How are you so strong? _

It made Victor ache.

  
_ How much more do you need to endure? _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally! A proper confession, right? I do apologize that I tend to tease at anything physical between the two of them. But they've just started! And they're still giant goofs
> 
> In an omegaverse manga, now would be the time to share a bond. But I think that even though they absolutely love each other and want that bond more than anything, they don't want to hurt one another. A bond is irreversible. Yurio understands it the best. It has consequences that are forever.
> 
> Yuuri got his chance at a second face off! I know a lot of you were disappointed he was attacked several chapters ago. And that it seemed he was easy to push down. But Yuuri proves he's just as strong, if not stronger than an alpha in this chapter. I'm such a big fan of Yuuri that I wouldn't write him as weak. So thanks for sticking around to see him in action!
> 
> Hopefully next chapter I can get us to the start of the skating events. But I'm going to be honest, I don't really know what sort of skating events would follow the chronology of the cannon. I'm going to have to research! 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! Until next week!
> 
> -Dazzledghosts


	9. The Familiar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You are all wonderful people and gosh, thank you for the kind comments. I couldn't wait a week to release this chapter after all your encouragement. I love reading your insights and interpretations of this story. Thank you. 
> 
> This chapter might be a slower paced one. But I do promise more insight into Yuuri's struggle as an omega along with plenty of podium family moments. Also some romance. Victor and Yurio have a talk and plenty of healthy fluff.

Yuuri’s cut seeped blood profusely. His honeysuckle and cardamom persistent. Yurio found it difficult to concentrate with. He had never been really exposed to Yuuri’s smell. Not since the day they first learned what Yuuri was. But even then, he had been so distant from it. It was nothing but a faint flicker. Now he was covered in the omega’s blood and scent. A haze of perfume. It rested on the young alpha’s glands almost as though he had been marked.

He didn’t dislike it. No… quite the opposite. It was soothing and gentle, unlike other omega scents that seemed to be overpoweringly sweet. A very welcoming aroma that was so fitting for Yuuri. He wanted to climb into Yuuri’s arms. Not the way one would imagine an alpha and omega to be entangled. But rather like how one crawled under the covers of a warm bed, fighting off the day’s insecurities and doubts. An intimacy void of desire but full of acceptance.

Victor and Yurio went with him to the hospital after the police took the offending alpha into custody. The very doctor that had administered care for Victor’s rut saw Yuuri. He briefly nodded to the silver alpha in recognition but gave him respectful distance. Yurio and Victor were allowed to stay with Yuuri while the doctor observed his cut.

“What did this?” he asked when he first saw the wound.

“A... a knife,” Yuuri fumbled over his words. He was unsure how to explain being attacked by a knife wielding alpha. The doctor raised a knowing eyebrow but didn’t question further.

Victor and Yurio sat quietly in two stiff plastic chairs at the corner of the small room. They gave each other awkward glances. Their presence felt intrusive but neither of them wanted to leave Yuuri alone. They suspected Yuuri felt the same. He had tugged on Victor’s sleeve the whole time, guiding them into the sterile room.

The overly white lights that washed away color and the scents of disinfectant gave the alpha flashbacks to his rut. To when he couldn’t touch Yuuri. Waves of nausea and the prickle of his skin followed the memory. But he willingly followed Yuuri into that place, wanting to remind himself that Yuuri was more his than ever before.

“The cut’s a bit deep and with how long it is, I think it’s best that we give you a few stitches.” The doctor called over a nurse who began rummaging through cabinets and drawers. He hovered over the sink, washing his hands. “What I think is more pressing than your cut is that you’re an unmated omega.”

“... Eh?” Yuuri was taken aback.

The nurse cleaned his wound while the doctor settled in front of Yuuri.

“You need to think about the health of yours and most importantly, those around you.”

“Oh… um… I use suppressants regularly. Right now I’m waiting for the toxicity to go down in my blood. But I’ve got plenty of neutralizing soaps, creams, and patches.” Yuuri tried not to fidget as the doctor numbed him. He wasn’t bothered by the wound or the stitches. It was the doctor’s scrutiny that made him nervous. “I’ll be back on them in less than a month,” he added trying to appease.

“Mr. Katsuki, your quality of life will greatly improve if you find a mate. I can tell from your scent that you’ve never even shared your heat with anyone. That can’t be comfortable or even remotely healthy behavior. Is there a reason for your refusal?”

Yuuri turned beat red. The man proceeded to stitch up Yuuri, unfazed by the words he had just spoken.

“I’m an athlete…” Yuuri let the rest of his sentence trail off. The doctor wasn’t really listening to him.

“I’m not sure that’s a suitable career for an omega. Mr. Katsuki, I see you have capable alphas in your life. Why not ask one of them? You’ve certainly asked one to scent you.”

“I… I…” Yuuri began to stammer.

Victor straightened his back and clenched his fists while Yurio crossed his arms and narrowed his blue eyes. They didn’t like how the doctor was talking to Yuuri. It was as though Yuuri knew nothing of his own life. Like he never lived a day of it. But interjecting into the conversation seemed wrong. As if they too saw Yuuri incapable of caring for himself.

“You’ll avoid situations like this one. Please think about everyone else around you. You’ll drag them down with you.” He finished the last stitch. “How much more trouble are you looking to make? You’ve already put one alpha in a rut and now you have another chasing you. Pick one.” The doctor’s tone was nothing but clinical. Perhaps he had no ill will, but from Yurio and Victor’s perspective it was demeaning. His words phrased as if Yuuri was at fault.

Yuuri was quiet now. He didn’t look angry or even sad. Eyes downcast and just exhausted.

“I hardly think any of this is Yuuri’s fault.” Victor couldn’t hold back anymore. His hands were gripping the arms rests of the chair tightly.

“Having several alphas fight for your affection may seem pleasant Mr. Katsuki, but I think you’re beginning to see consequences of your game.”

“What are you implying?” Victor stood up now, livid. The doctor had been nothing but respectful towards Victor. Why was he treating Yuuri so different? Did being an omega without a mate matter so much? How many times had Yuuri been disregarded for something so trivial?

Yurio kicked the waste basket next to him. It clanged against the floor and rattled across the room, spilling its contents. Yuuri flinched at the sound.

“You think anyone would want this?” Yurio’s voice was deep to the point it clashed with his smaller frame. “That alpha attacked _us_ unprovoked.”

“Mr. Katsuki, I hope you’re not thinking of involving a child in your games. Surely you have enough alphas to pick from that you don’t need someone so young.” He slipped his gloves off and went back to the sink to wash his hands.

Victor felt his chest swell with resentment. The absurdity of what this man was implying left him speechless.

Yurio’s face was red. His teeth clenched tightly that he couldn’t open his mouth and shout. Yuuri was careful of others to the point of hurting himself. To imply that he could toy with anyone, let alone Yurio or Victor seemed unimaginable.

“I’m not…”

“Please keep the stitches dry for the next 24 hours. You may wash it twice a day afterwards. You will not need to come in to have the stitches removed. They will dissolve on their own.” The doctor cut Yuuri off and shut the door behind him.

“Did… did that really just happen?” Yurio was vexed at how someone could just talk to another human in that manner. His hands quivered angrily. This all because Yuuri was an unmated omega and nothing more.

Yuuri sighed and tried to put on his coat. He flinched when his stitches snagged against fabric.

“Yuuri… let me…” Victor gently took Yuuri’s coat and held it up for the omega to slip his hands in. A smile finally appeared on Yuuri’s mouth.

“Thanks, Victor.” The alpha felt his heart happily skip a beat at hearing his name said so affectionately.

“Why didn’t you say anything to him? You just let him say whatever he wanted to you!” Yurio was furious. Not at Yuuri. But that someone could be so dismissive of Yuuri without knowing all the hardships the omega had endured.

“It’s the same thing as always…” Yuuri sounded weary but accustomed. That angered Yurio more.

“Yuuri… does this happen often?” Victor asked while helping Yuuri slip his arm into a sleeve. His hands then fumbled to fasten Yuuri’s buttons. Yuuri tried to do it himself but Victor gently swatted the omega’s hands of out the way. His desire to pamper Yuuri was a bit irrational.

“I suppose…? Ever since I presented? It gets tiring arguing with them.”

“That doesn’t make it right…” Yurio felt his heart clench.

“No… And I’m sorry he implied those things about you two.” Yuuri took more offense at the words not directed at himself. Those he could bury away and ignore.

“Oh, Yuuri…” Victor put his hand on the back of Yuuri’s head and pulled him close. He planted a kiss on his forehead. The omega appreciated the gesture and leaned into it.

“That’s not what I’m angry about!”

“I know… Thanks, Yura.”

“Did… did you just call me…?” The young alpha’s pale skin turned the brightest red it had ever been.

“Shall we go home? I miss Makkachin.” Yuuri just wanted to leave. It had been a long day and he was done with it. Done with being an omega. He wanted to go his shared home with Victor, where he wasn’t Yuuri the omega. Yuuri the unmated. Yuuri the unbonded. But just... Yuuri.

\---

Makkachin leaped onto Yuuri the moment they were through the door. He seemed to know that Yuuri was a down and proceeded to lick enthusiastically until the brunette’s glasses clattered to the ground.

Yurio shuffled awkwardly to the couch. He hadn’t been in Victor’s apartment since the two moved in together. To his shock, he couldn’t smell anything of Yuuri. How had Victor never realized Yuuri was an omega? Even betas had a scent. The void of aroma should have been beyond suspicious.

Victor lifted up Makkachin and pouted. The poodle whined softly.

“Hogging Yuuri to yourself isn’t fair...”

Yuuri wrapped his stitches in a plastic bag and went to shower. Blood crusted to his skin and smelled too strongly for either alpha to focus. The Russians on the other hand changed into new clothes free of Yuuri’s blood. Yurio wore clothes belonging to the brunette since their bodies were similar in size. Something Victor was envious of.

Yuuri emerged from the shower, completely lacking in smell. He looked so tired and hurt.

Victor tried to hide his displeasure but Yurio could see it in the way the older alpha gnawed on the corner of his mouth. It was obvious he wanted to scent Yuuri again. The way the alpha’s fingers twitched when Yuuri passed him spoke volumes, resisting the urge to grab and take. It alarmed Yurio slightly, but he appreciated that Victor restrained himself.

“Will pasta be alright, Yurio? I don’t cook many Western dishes but I like to try every now and then.”

“I’m fine with whatever.” The young alpha had settled into the couch with his phone. Makkachin’s chin was nestled on his leg. Yuri looked and felt completely at home. A sensation that he rarely felt even in his own space.

\---

They ate not in the kitchen but the coffee table. Yurio didn’t feel like moving.

“So Phichit, Chris, Minami, JJ, Yurio, and I will be at Rostelecom Cup and Victor will be in Skate Canada? Who else will be in Canada?”

“I think Georgi, Otabek, and Seung Gil…?” Yurio tapped his chin.

“What a shame. I want to skate on the same ice as Yuuri…”

“Well if you score high enough, we’ll meet at NHK Trophy in Sapparo?” Yuuri teased. How devious! Victor loved when Yuuri’s competitive nature slipped out.

They fell into a silence while eating the pasta Yuuri had made with Victor’s help.

“Do… do people talk to you like that often?” Yurio didn’t know how to ask it.

“Hm?” Yuuri was finishing the last bites of his meal.

“The way the doctor treated you…”

“Oh…” Yuuri set down his plate. “Uh… only when they realize I’m not a beta.” He looked lost in thought, trying to recall when it all changed. “Which isn’t often! I look more like a beta than any beta I’ve seen. I presented so late that we all thought I was one.” Yuuri emphasized with a self deprecating laugh. But it wasn’t sincere. There was an emptiness in the sound.

What hurt Yuuri most was that there was a time he wasn’t an omega.

“Yuuri…” Victor huffed and leaned in closer to Yuuri. Almost like a warning but more an utterance of disbelief that Yuuri thought so little of himself. Yuuri was more beautiful than any omega or alpha the had ever seen.

“Oh, but there are a lot of beautiful betas too,” Yuuri didn’t want to yearn for his childhood. “Phichit is very handsome. And so is Michelle… and Yakov use to…”

Victor didn’t like others being called handsome. The Russian recalled when Yuuri had used that word affectionately just for him. Without meaning to, he rested his arm behind Yuuri in jealousy. If either of them moved, they would be touching. His pheromones softly seeping out like a wounded child.

“Oh gross, stop, Victor.” Yurio feigned gagging.

But Yuuri didn’t protest. If anything he looked pleased. He had been mournful washing away Victor’s pheromones in the shower. It chased away all his worries.

“Envy doesn’t look good on you, Yura,” Victor grinned before a pillow smacked him in the face.

Yuuri was stuck between them and decided to do nothing. Their playful banter gave him a content feeling. The corner of his mouth naturally rested into a smile. He happily listened to the two alphas arguing. They couldn’t hear the affection in their own voices.

Yuuri needed this. This closeness and simplicity. To forget how the doctor had been so dismissing and the memory of the alpha that attacked him. He had been so shaken when he saw the alpha with a knife charge at Yuri. He didn’t care how many cuts he was given as long as the young alpha was safe. He couldn’t quite put a word on the feeling. Their bond was almost familial. Yuuri didn’t feel like the blond’s mother or father. And he was certain the young Russian didn’t have such a sentiment either. Regardless, every time Yuuri glanced to see the boy safe and happy next to him on the couch, his heart swelled with happiness.

_I’m so happy I made it in time. I’m so happy you’re here and safe._

Yurio could feel the weight of that tenderness under the omega’s brown gaze. He refused to openly acknowledge it but willingly accepted the warmth it gave him.

Victor must have felt the same as Yuuri. He was teasing too much, but his heart wasn’t in it. The insults he gave were more doting than anything.

“Oh really? I smell like old ladies? Well Yuuri likes how I smell.”

“You’re going bald like an old lady too.”

Yuuri erupted into a laugh. He tried to cover his mouth and stifle the sound.

“Yuuri…! You don’t think I’m bald do you?!” he swung his arm around Yuuri’s neck, feigning hurt.

“He does! He absolutely does!” Yurio was cackling, but it wasn’t mean.

Yuuri could only laugh. The man that had been his idol for so long was pouting at being called a balding old lady.

“Yuuri!” Victor whined and grew closer.

“Victor is very handsome!” he managed through his laughter.

“As handsome as Phichit?”

“The most handsome!”

“You two are disgusting…”

“Oh but Yura so very beautiful too,” Yuuri added. The use of Yurio’s diminutive didn’t go unnoticed to the blond.

“He gets handsome and I get beautiful?” As much as he tried to sound upset, his grin spoke otherwise. He felt a bit of pride at the compliment.

\---

Yurio fell asleep on the couch after they had all watched videos on Yuuri’s phone. They had clustered around the omega. Without meaning to, the blond’s head fell slack onto Yuuri’s shoulder. His breaths were slow and deep, rustling a few of his golden strands of hair. Yuuri could feel each soft puff tickle his neck.

Victor’s body on the other hand, had inched closer as the night had passed. One arm around Yuuri’s waist while his head crookedly propped up against the brunette’s. His thigh planted firmly against Yuuri’s.

He was sandwiched between the two Russians. Yurio on his right, Victor on his left.

“He put on a brave face, but I think he was just as frightened as I was…” Yuuri gently pat Yurio while the small alpha murmured something in his sleep. The blond buried himself deeper against Yuuri. “I’m glad he’s not hurt. Oh god… when I saw the knife nearing his face, I didn’t think I could move fast enough.” Yuuri shuddered at the thought.

“Yuuri, we were all scared. The moment I saw you both covered in blood… I couldn’t think.” Victor’s grip tightened at the memory. “When I smelled him on you… oh god Yuuri, I thought he had…” he let the words trail off, placing a kiss on Yuuri’s neck instead, forgetting that it might be too bold of an act. The skin warmed pleasantly from the touch.

“I hated smelling like him…” Yuuri scrunched his nose. “I only want to smell like Victor…” he mumbled.

“Oh…?” Victor was doing his damndest to catch Yuuri’s brown eyes, but the omega shyed away. Yuuri wasn’t use to being so open about his affection. Victor’s hand grabbed Yuuri’s chin and tugged. Blue-green locked with sparkling brown. “Could I then…?”

Yuuri nodded.

But first, the omega softly eased Yurio onto the couch. The young alpha clung onto Yuuri’s shirt, but nestled into the cushions. Yuuri grabbed several blankets and gingerly placed them on top Yurio. Victor watched as Yuuri gently fussed over the sleeping boy. It was endearing.

“Goodnight, Yura. Thank you for everything.” Yuuri brushed blond hair affectionately to the side. Yurio sighed, the crease in his brows softening.

“You spoil him too much.”

“He deserves some spoiling, don’t you think? He’s been through so much… Especially after today.”

“Ahh… My Yuuri is too kind…”

Yuuri’s heart skipped at the use of possessives.

They walked down the hall to their bedrooms. There was a split second to decide: whose room? Victor wanted to take Yuuri into his own. But he worried that would be too presumptuous. They had confessed their love to one another, but everything seemed precarious. As though something could destroy their delicate balance.

But Victor didn’t make the choice. Yuuri stopped at Victor’s door. His eyes stayed planted on the wooden floor, afraid to read Victor’s reaction. So he missed the smile that made the alpha’s eyes squint tenderly at the edges.

Victor guided Yuuri to his large bed. Awkwardly, they climbed onto the soft surface together. Victor crawled on top of Yuuri. It was painful not imagining anything sexual. Victor longed to peel off Yuuri’s clothes and rake his hands across the skater’s body. What would Yuuri taste like? Did their skin contrast beside each one another’s? How would his body move with Victor inside him? Oh god… what did it even feel like inside Yuuri?

But he pushed those thoughts aside when his torso met Yuuri’s. He could feel the shape of the omega’s chest through their clothes. The omega’s heart was pounding. Was Yuuri afraid or excited? Victor couldn’t tell.

“May I?” he brushed a thumb against Yuuri’s wrist.

“Mhmm…” Yuuri consented. Victor brought Yuuri’s wrist to his mouth. He kissed it softly at first. A treamble moved down Yuuri’s body. Victor bit back a groan and parted his mouth, his breath hot against the sensitive skin.

Yuuri gasped audibly as Victor traced a line up the omega’s tendon with his tongue. The sound was so erotic, it surprised the both of them. In his elation, Victor pushed down completely on to Yuuri’s smaller body, framed with the omega’s legs to either side. Like the night before, Yuuri’s hands pushed down on Victor’s back, ignoring the pain in his freshly stitched hand. The pressure seemed encouraging on the alpha’s back and electrified him with thrill.

Victor’s scent was stronger this time. He hadn’t used his pheromones in excess to ward off the unwanted attentions of alphas. Yuuri breathed in deep as it settled onto his skin. He never thought Victor would willingly do this. That he could feel the weight of the Russian ontop of him. He had daydreamed of this intimacy and each time he berated himself for it, assuming Victor forever out of his reach. It seemed unreal. His emotions overflowing.

He had been so close to losing this. To having that wretched alpha dig his teeth in.

But Victor was here. Victor was in his arms.

“愛してる.”

“Oh, Yuuri…” His excitement got the better of him. He descended down into a kiss. Something he had been dreaming of ever since the chaste one they shared the night before. But this was different. Less refined and more insatiable. Yuuri’s mouth didn’t resist as he pecked gently at first. In fact, it parted encouragingly. Ever so gingerly, Victor’s tongue pushed in brushing against Yuuri’s.

The omega gave a quiet moan. The vibrations egging the alpha on.

Victor’s hands had a life of their own. One cupped Yuuri’s face, while the other pushed down on Yuuri’s hip. The omega shyly rubbed his tongue against Victor’s. The friction made their mouths buzz. Victor’s hand slipped past the hem of Yuuri’s shirt. It’s movement slow and completely unaware to the alpha. Yuuri was acutely alert of the sensation but only for a moment. Their kiss deepened, blurring away anything else.

Those long fingers inched up until they brushed up against Yuuri’s nipple. Victor swallowed Yuuri’s whimper through their heated kiss. The sounds their mouths made quickly becoming obscene.

Victor’s thumb rolled the nipple beneath it. Yuuri’s body twitched violently as slick threatened to spill.

“Ah!” he broke the kiss and arched his back, lifting Victor up with it.

“Oh… oh, Yuuri! I’m sorry! I got too excited!”

The brunette squeezed his eyes shut, trying to stop his slick from gushing out. His body tightened.

“Yuuri… Yuuri, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to…” The alpha interpreted the rigidness and unwillingness.

“No… no don’t apologize. I’m sorry…” Yuuri’s voice was deeper. Needier. Victor had never heard Yuuri sound like that before.

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No… It’s… it’s me…” he spoke between deep breaths. Another quiver as he resisted his own body for the third time. He didn’t want Victor to go into a rut. He had hurt the alpha enough.

“I… I…” Victor was stammering, afraid he had pushed too hard too fast. Everything was so new to Victor despite being so experienced.

Yuuri never thought he would see the day where his idol would trip over his own words. He would have smiled if he wasn’t of the threshold of leaking slick.

“I’m not on suppressants, Victor… The… the… s…” Yuuri stiffened again as the walls of his body pulsed, threatening to spill.

Victor moved to get off, but Yuuri’s hands were still on his shoulders, holding him down. Victor pleasantly reminded of how strong Yuuri could be.

It was embarrassing to get the words out. “The slick… I can’t stop it…” he murmured into the alpha’s chest.

“Oh…? Oh!” Victor’s arms wrapped around Yuuri’s waist as he rolled onto his back. Yuuri on top now. The pressure off his stomach helped lessen the flow. “Better?” Yuuri half nodded half nuzzled Victor’s broad chest.

The new posture gave Victor a better view of Yuuri’s flushed face. God he was stunning.

Victor wanted more and from what he could tell, Yuuri’s omega body did too. But he didn’t want to chance it. He wanted Yuuri to want it. No… need it. And the thought of another rut was exhausting in of itself.

But it was absolutely thrilling! His touch could do that to Yuuri! Victor was well versed in carnal pleasures. He knew how to elicit desire and receive it. But his stomach had never fluttered with such joy at creating arousal. And how quickly! Victor remembered having to work to draw out slick outside of a heat. Did Yuuri want him that much? Did Victor’s touch make him feel that good? He wanted to know.

“I’m… I’m sorry… I don’t want to hurt you…”

“Oh Yuuri, I’m the one that should say that.” A hand slipped between the brunette’s hair. Victor liked to feel the sensation of Yuuri’s locks between his fingers.

“I’ve never really done anything like this before… I don’t know what I’m suppose to do.” Yuuri shut his eyes and clenched Victor’s shirt.

“Oh?” Victor was intrigued. He had suspected such. But there were moments where Yuuri was beyond erotic that made him doubt. How could someone so inexperienced have such eros? His fingers twirled the fine hairs at the base of Yuuri’s head. The omega’s hair was getting longer, he mused.

“No one’s wanted me before…”

“Yuuri, that can’t be true.” Omega or not, Yuuri was beautiful.

“And I’ve never wanted anyone… until you…”

How could Victor feel so much happiness from so few words?

“Oh, Yuuri! я люблю тебя!” Victor wrapped his arms and legs around Yuuri in an embrace that was absurd.

“Victor!”

He planted multiple kisses on Yuuri’s face. His forehead. His soft cheeks. His nose. They were over exaggerated with cartoonish kissings sounds. “Muwah!”

Yuuri laughed. His worries pooling away.

“я люблю тебя!”

\---

“How long are you two going to sleep?”

“Hm…?” Victor stirred.

Yurio was standing in the doorway, his arms crossed and Makkachin at his side.

The young alpha was surprised to find himself on the couch. He hadn’t thought of spending the night. At first, he waiting patiently for the two to wake up. But minutes ticked by to an hour. They had practice. So he walked to Yuuri’s room to find the door open and the bed made. His initial thought was that the omega was awake. He decided to awaken the older alpha and burst open Victor’s door only to find the two of them intertwined.

Yuuri’s head was on Victor’s shoulder while the alpha’s arm possessively wrapped around. The omega seemed to curl deep into Victor. His shoulder peeking out from his shirt. No mark present but the pheromones of the night before’s scenting still potent.

“Wake up! We have practice!” Yurio tugged on the sheets.

Yuuri murmured and nuzzled deeper on to Victor.

“Looks like Yuuri doesn’t want to.” Victor sleepily kissed the top of the brunette’s head.

“Gross… don’t do that!” Yurio moved to grab the extra pillow beside Yuuri to smack Victor with. Instead he was grabbed by the collar and tugged onto the sleeping omega. Both the alphas were shocked. Even in sleep, Yuuri was strong.

“Five more minutes Vicchan…” Yuuri patted Yurio’s head down onto his chest.

“What are you doing…! Katsudon!” he struggled but Yuuri was already asleep again.

“I need a picture of this…” Victor was tempted to grab his phone but he was far too comfortable to move.

“Don’t you dare!”

“Mmm… Shh, Vicchan.” Yurio quieted. “Good boy.”

It was a losing battle for Yurio. He settled into the sheets. The sensation of resting on Yuuri was familiar.

“Hey… Is Yuuri ok?”

“Hm?” Victor was playing with Yuuri’s soft hair.

“I… I couldn’t do anything when the alpha attacked. I mean, I tried. But the moment I saw the knife coming at me, I froze.”

“He was shaken up. But I think more so for you.”

Yurio didn’t like that answer.

“Yuri…”

“Yeah?"

“I’m glad you’re not hurt. And I’m sorry the both of you were attacked. If I hadn’t nearly killed that alpha in the first place, I don’t think he would have come back. Yuuri wouldn’t have been hurt.” Victor brushed a thumb over Yuuri’s wounded hand. The omega sighed in his sleep. “I wish I had killed him…” his voice turned dark.

“That other alpha’s worst off. I wish you could have seen it,” Yurio’s eyes glimmered with admiration at Yuuri. “The piggy is a lot stronger than he looks.”

Yuuri mumbled something in Japanese and shifted.

“Are you two… a thing now?” Yurio’s voice changed.

“Does it upset you?”

“No… Just… I’ve only really been around one omega before. My mom. And she was stuck in a bond with my alpha father that she hated. I can remember one day after my father left us, I caught her with a lighter to her neck. She thought that if she burned the mark off that maybe she’d be free to be with someone else.”

Victor was quiet while Yuri spoke. He had known that the blond was from an alpha and omega, much like himself, but he hadn’t know the pair were so broken.

“I knew she was miserable… but not that miserable. I really tried to be there for her after that… But I looked too much like my dad. Smelled like him too. Everything I tried didn’t stop her from taking her life in the end. I know you wouldn’t do that to Yuuri. And that Yuuri isn’t my mom. But he’s… he’s important to me. He’s my friend… He’s Yuuri. I… I...” Yurio was on the verge of professing love. But it wasn’t the love that Victor and Yuuri had. He couldn’t give it a name. Just that he wanted Yuuri to be near and happy.

“Yura… I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“He’s already been hurt so much. But he acts like it’s nothing.”

“If it helps… I have no intention of hurting him.” Victor propped himself up with one elbow to look at the sleeping omega better.

“Intentions and actions are different things and I think you know that better than anyone… If you ever do hurt him, don’t think for a minute I won’t do everything I can to take Yuuri away from you.”

Yurio’s threats were usually empty. But Victor saw it in the young alpha’s eyes. He meant every word. Being challenged didn’t anger Victor, even though it should have. And he knew that it was well within Yurio’s ability to do so. He was growing up to be a person well deserving of Yuuri’s love.

“But Yuuri asked me to trust him. Trust that he trusts you. So I’m trying...”

Those words were familiar. Yuuri had asked him for something oddly similar.

“I love Yuuri... I love him more than I thought it was possible to love, Yura. Not because he’s an omega. Because he’s Yuuri.”

It was odd. Both of them had professed their love and admiration for Yuuri. But there was no animosity.

“Anyway… even if you tried, I think he’ll just punch you in the throat…”

Victor laughed.

“I think I’d be delighted by a forceful Yuuri…”

“You’re gross and obsessed.”

They stayed like that. Victor twirling Yuuri’s hair and Yurio listening to Yuuri’s heartbeat. It could have been different. They could have both been vying for Yuuri’s affection. But they wanted drastically different things from Yuuri. It was relieving. Neither alpha admitted it, but they wanted the company of the other. Yuuri had brought them all closer.

They both fell asleep to sound of Yuuri’s soft breaths. Yurio with his head on Yuuri’s chest. Victor with his arm wrapped firmly across Yuuri’s abdomen. Makkachin had joined in, curled on top of Yuuri's feet.

Yuuri groggily woke up to himself surrounded. He was absolutely embarrassed and completely unsure as to how he wound up in such a situation. It wasn’t his intention to spend the night in Victor’s bed. And how had the young alpha ended up beside him? It seemed like the last thing the boy would want to do.

But he decided to savor the warmth instead of fret over it.

This was where Yuuri was Yuuri.

This was home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't get to the skating events, but that'll be the next chapter! We will be at Rostelecom Cup with the other skaters mentioned in this chapter. The two Yuris get to skate against one another.
> 
> Thanks so much for putting up with this chapter. I'm worried it wasn't as critical as other ones. But Victor and Yurio needed to really talk. 
> 
> The romance between Victor and Yuuri is advancing, but slowly. Yuuri's never done this before. And Victor has never been so in love. Neither of them want to mess it up. And a rut or heat this close to the season wouldn't be good for either of them. And I'll be honest, I really do love slow burns. I'm incredibly sorry! It makes the final moment so much more monumental. But it will become more intense with each chapter if that's any consolation!


	10. The Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! And thanks so much for not only reading this but for all the kindness you have given me. I am always so happy to read your comments. It made me so excited, I decided to post early instead of waiting the whole week. 
> 
> As promised! Rostelecom Cup time! The Yurios skate, we meet some old friends, have some romance, and something quite frightening happens. 
> 
> Thank you for reading.

Rostelecom Cup had finally approached. 

The three of them had been training endlessly for weeks. But none more than Yuuri. Something had shifted in his demeanor since the doctor berated him for being an unmated omega tempting alphas. He usually let those kinds of words fall on deaf ears. He was use to this. To being looked down upon for being an omega. 

But to be childishly admonished in front of Victor and Yuri stung him. Yuuri was gentle and generally forgiving, but still had his pride. So Yuuri skated and skated until blistered and bruised. His determination sparked both Victor and Yurio. The two alphas would watch, enamored as Yuuri moved across the rink, one minute a furious temptress on ice another as soft as a ghost. 

Yurio pushed himself further than before, trying to catch up to Japanese skater. Victor felt invigorated to skate unlike ever before. Before meeting Yuuri, skating had become suffocating to him. Just a series of movements that held no meaning. But that wasn’t true for Yuuri. Not even after hitting the lowest point in his career, the omega loved to skate. His body made music that moved Victor to dance. 

Each night before scenting Yuuri, Victor would cradle the omega’s feet. At first Yuuri shied away from the touch, feeling uncomfortable with his body. Victor had bandaged his wounds in the past when he was just Yuuri’s coach. Now it was drastically different. The alpha gingerly held Yuuri, not as if the skater were weak enough to break. But each touch was silent worship.

All of Yuuri was beautiful. And Victor wanted to caress and love every surface of Yuuri. Every scar, every curve, every inch with reverence.  

It made Yuuri’s heart race and his body tremor for more. He wasn’t use to being touched that way. Or touched at all. Some nights, Victor’s affection seemed to overflow as he would plant kisses on Yuuri’s feet. The omega would try to shrink into the bed, far away from Victor. But the alpha was persistent. He would feel guilty at making Yuuri such a charming shade of red, but never regret. What he really desired was to drag his tongue across the skin. Those wounded feet guided Yuuri across the ice like a force to be reckoned with. They carried Yuuri and held his weight. And Victor wanted to lick, suck, kiss, and bite as though each act were a prayer.  

When he finished bandaging Yuuri’s battered feet, Victor would crawl onto Yuuri. Let his body sink into the omega and release all the pheromones held back throughout the day. His Yuuri would accept all of it. Let it deliciously seep into his pores. 

Victor was careful not to overstimulate the omega’s body. His desire to make Yuuri’s slick spill was painful to ignore. Just knowing that he could do that to the other made his hands shake in excitement. How he wanted to make Yuuri crumble with desire. 

_ I want to worship you. To make your body quake with pleasure. You’re my everything _ .

\---

Before boarding the train from Saint Petersburg to Moscow, Yakov pulled Victor aside. 

“I’m not going to interject into whatever it is you have with Yuuri, but I will say this, Vitya: you shouldn’t scent him during Rostelecom Cup.”

Victor tried to protest. He had grown so accustomed to his nightly ritual of climbing ontop of Yuuri. He still felt his heart skip a beat whenever Yuuri passed him with his scent clinging to that soft skin. Yuuri was his and he was Yuuri’s. It was the only physical proof Victor had. 

“No one knows Yuuri is an omega. There’s _never_ _even been_ an omega in professional figure skating. Think what will happen if it gets out to the public. They might not even let him compete. Do you want that?”

Victor knew Yakov was right, but that didn’t make it and easier to accept. 

“I know you two have grown close. I see how you look at him and how he looks at you. But this is for him, Victor. If he wants the world to know what he is, let it be on his terms. Not because you’re a foolish alpha. Something I know you’re not.”

Victor huffed and ran his fingers through his hair. It was frustrating. But Victor would never do anything to jeopardize Yuuri’s skating. 

“I won’t scent him.”

“Victor…” Yakov’s gaze was doubtful. “This is for the best.”

\---

Victor plopped next to Yuuri. The train rattled as it cut through the land. 

Yuuri seemed to notice the alpha was upset. Victor usually liked to lean into Yuuri but the Russian was uncharacteristically stiff. He decided not to say anything but instead rested his head against Victor’s shoulder. It seemed to do the trick as the alpha sank into Yuuri’s warmth. 

Yurio was sitting across from them, all his belongings strewn about. He gave them an arched eyebrow that seemed less disapproving as it was more annoyance. 

\---

After five hours, they arrived at the hotel near the Megasport Arena. Immediately in the lobby, they ran into Minami. But they didn’t recognize him. The young boy towered tall and his chest had expanded wide enough to rival Victor. 

“Yuuri-san!” he had shouted excitedly, charging towards them. Victor’s grip on Yuuri tightened. He sensed an alpha approaching them fast.  

“Minami-kun?” as recognition settled in. 

“Surprised?!” he asked excitedly. 

“I… I didn’t recognize you. You’re grown so…”

“Tall?! I presented as an alpha late but I managed to grow pretty fast!” He flashed a toothy grin. It was evident that he wanted praise from Yuuri, but the omega was too shocked to register. Minami was new to being an alpha. His pheromones so unfiltered and potent that they stung Yuuri’s glands. 

Victor, being a mature alpha, noticed. He put on his best smile. The one he used when standing on top of the podium with gold around his neck. Emotionless but dazzling nonetheless. He wrapped an arm around Yuuri’s shoulders and pulled him in. 

“It’s a pleasure to see you joining us this season, Minami.” 

“Thank you Victor! I’m excited to skate on the same ice as Yuuri-san!” Victor was certain that was a challenge.  

Victor’s smile vanished. 

Minami’s coach walked up behind him, holding his jacket. 

“Ah! Katsuki-san! I’m sorry if Minami is bothering you,” she said with a bow. 

“N-no! Not at all! It’s always a delight to see Minami-kun,” Yuuri respectfully bowed back. 

“Well he’s grown cheeky…” Victor muttered as they parted ways with Minami and his coach.

“He thinks just because he’s an alpha that he has a chance… I’ll just crush him on the ice.” Yurio seemed lost in thought. He had presented since he was thirteen and had yet to grow into a body fitting of an alpha. But that wasn’t what irked him. It was the way Minami leaned in and let his pheromones brush against Yuuri. Almost as if the newly presented alpha was trying to stake a claim on Yuuri. A message saying: “I’m an alpha now. Watch me, Yuuri. I’ll win your heart.” 

“That was quite the surprise! I didn’t think we’d bump into anyone so soon. Phichit texted saying he wanted to grab dinner with us. Any news from Chris?” 

Victor was gnawing at his lips. He knew he couldn’t scent Yuuri tonight and already there was an alpha flittering about him. 

“Victor?”

“Oh…” Victor pulled out his phone. “Chris says he’s already here but he’s resting with his partner. They’ll join us for dinner.” There was a bit of envy in his voice. Chris and his mate always smelled of one another. They were both alphas but had found a bond that Victor had always admired. And here Victor was, straining to keep himself off Yuuri. 

\--- 

“Yuuri,” Chris rolled out the skater’s name seductively. He appeared from the back and planted his hand firmly on Yuuri’s behind. “As soft as ever!”

Yuuri’s body made a sharp twitch but otherwise didn’t move. He was never sure how to react around Chris. 

“Ch… Chris!” Yuuri stuttered.

The alpha pressed his chest against Yuuri’s back. 

“I’ve missed you,” the words were whispered the side of the brunette’s face. Chris was being overly affectionate. A game he loved to play with Yuuri. The Japanese skater’s reactions were always so charming. Yuuri knew Chris’ antics were playful but they were still so provocative.  

Victor didn’t like this game. Even before knowing Yuuri was an omega, it always bothered him. He clenched his jaw tightly, unknowingly letting his pheromones pulse.  

Chris felt his skin prickle at the Russian’s bergamot. But Victor wasn’t the only one to carry that aroma. The similarity in Victor’s scent and Yuuri didn’t go unnoticed to him. 

“Yuuri… you smell like…” Victor tugged Yuuri out of the alpha’s arms.  

“Chris! Let’s go eat!” the alpha embraced his old friend. His arms locking a bit too tight. 

Yurio took Victor’s place next to Yuuri while the two older alpha reunited. Something seemed tense about Victor. When Yuuri gave Yurio a quizzical look, he just received a shrug. 

\--

“He smells like you, Victor. Who knew you’d be into betas?” Chris teased out of earshot. “But Yuuri is such a soft beta… almost as if…” he mused to himself. “Ah… but I have my mate. What a shame.” 

“Chris…” Victor warned.  

“You’ve been smitten since that banquet night, Victor. I’m happy to see you two are finally getting intimate. Now please tell me, how soft is he really?” 

Chris and Victor had a close friendship. They shared many of their heartaches and romances together in explicit detail. Many nights spent telling tales of their conquests and follies to one another over the phone. Sometimes in hushed tones, others cackling in uncontrollable laughter.  

Smelling Victor on the brunette and sensing the alpha’s overprotective pheromones spoke volumes. Victor never cared to scent his past lovers. 

“I wouldn’t know how _soft_ he is, Chris…”  

“Don’t tell me! You haven’t…? Oh Victor you’re a man with an iron will. Then why does he smell so strongly of you?”

“He lets me scent him every night…” Yakov had warned him to keep that to himself. But Chris was a friend he could trust.  

“Phichit!” the two alphas heard Yuuri’s voice. They turned around to see Phichit Chulanont wrapping his arms around Yuuri. In his excitement, the beta spun Yuuri around. He heard a laugh that Yuuri never gave him. It sounded so carefree.  

“Oh Victor… you’re oozing pheromones. Don’t tell me you’re jealous.” Chris hung his arm around Victor’s neck and teased. “Were you mad when I grabbed your precious Yuuri?” 

In all his time of knowing Victor, Chris had never seen the Russian so serious about anything off the ice. Ever since the whirlwind of a banquet night, Victor had been daydreaming of Yuuri. Chris remembered gettings texts late at night of Victor whining that Yuuri was nowhere to be found. But he assumed it to be a short lived infatuation. And then Yuuri resurfaced from silence, a video that was nothing if not calling out to Victor. 

Victor was always impulsive, but to abandon his life at the heels of a man he met in a drunken stupor seemed too eccentric for even him. As fond as Chris was of Yuuri, he had his doubts at the time. But seeing them together at Cup of China changed everything. The longing looks they snuck one another when they thought no one was looking. The lingering touches. 

He had anticipated the two of them becoming closer than coach and student. But from what he gathered, nothing ever moved beyond that their friendship. There were moments where the two danced so close to the line of being lovers. 

And now it seemed that they were finally just that. But Victor was more restrained than ever. Chris remembered him being draped across his lovers, especially in his youth. It was odd considering how obvious it was to anyone that Victor wanted to grab Yuuri and have his way. He saw it in how Victor’s breath quickened when near Yuuri. Those green-blue eyes dilating at the sight of Yuuri. A gaze constantly on Yuuri’s mouth. Hands always finding an excuse to touch. 

Victor Nikiforov was a man that fortuitously always got what he wanted. So why couldn’t have Yuuri in his entirety? It sparked Chris’ interest.

\---

That night Victor didn’t try to scent Yuuri. He sat on the edge of the bed, leaving Yuuri waiting.  

“Victor?”  

“Yakov told me I shouldnt… They would suspect you’re not a beta,” Victor sounded so dejected. 

“Oh… I guess that makes sense.” Yuuri’s voice was just as downtrodden. He looked forward to their nightly ritual. Yuuri already missed sensation of Victor weighing down on him. If he had known, he would have taken a shower in the morning instead of washing away the scent of Victor. His skin felt itchy without it. How strange that his body became so accustomed to Victor’s own.

“I want to be a good alpha, I really do, Yuuri.” He sounded so strained.

“Victor…” Yuuri wrapped his arms around Victor from the behind. The alpha wasn’t expecting that. “Victor is Victor. I don’t care if you’re an alpha or not.”

“Even before I presented, we knew I was an alpha… and I was certain I would be a good one. That I wouldn’t hurt anyone…” So much of his identity had hinged on that. Being the best skater and best alpha. That’s all anyone wanted him for. 

“And you haven’t, Victor.” Yuuri’s embrace tightened. 

“Yuuri…” 

“I love Victor just the way he his.” Being loved and not for the ideal version of himself meant everything. The weight of expectations gone.  

The two of them leaned into the bed. They were side by side, looking into each other’s eyes. 

“I’m going to miss having a part of you with me. Especially on the ice.” 

The confession may have seemed innocent to Yuuri, but for Victor it was beyond erotic. The alpha played with Yuuri’s hair. Yuuri found himself inching closer to Victor breathing in deep. If he couldn’t smell like Victor then he wanted to get his fill through his senses.  

They fell asleep like that. Curling into one another. 

\---

Yurio’s short was first. He was technically perfect. Every salchow and lutz landed without a single falter. His movements were fearsome. He had been refined in his previous performances. Demure and elegant. But this was something else. Yurio had become unhinged and his emotions were pouring out of him. Yakov watched proudly as the young alpha tore across the ice, eliciting gasps and applauds from everyone.  

He was telling a story. One of a boy wounded and cast aside, growing up into a man worthy of love. Utterly raw, he scraped the ice and stunned the judges. Yuuri watched and couldn’t hold his emotions in, tears welling at the corners of his brown eyes. He could see it. Yurio growing up at the hands of a pair that resented one another. Of a man leaving and a mother left behind broken to the point of resenting her own son for sharing his father’s face.

But the story didn’t stop there. The hurt became something else as Yurio paralleled his blades into a painfully tender spread eagle. From where Yuuri was watching, it was almost like the young alpha was reaching out to him. His arms held up in his direction. The movements became less sharp, but somehow even more powerful.  

“Davai!!” Yuuri shouted as Yurio entered his series of spins, landing each one as if to cut the ice. 

The world around Yurio faded. He wasn’t alone. There were people there to catch him should he fall. He was stronger than ever before. His past didn’t define him. Being an alpha didn’t shape him. All of that was nothing in comparison to his now. He made his own family. Made his own path. Yuuri let him see that.

_ Watch me, Yuuri. I’ll show you what I can do.  _

The music came to a stunning end as Yuri slid onto one knee and reached his arms out. The crowd erupted into applause.  

Yurio was breathing fast. He had pushed himself hard. Not just physically. He had hoped that his performance had reached out to one person in the crowd. To a brown eyed omega that carried so much self doubt and worry on his shoulders. 

_ This is for you Katsudon. You carried the weight of my burdens now let me carry yours _ .

In his kiss and cry, they announced 112.54. 

_ Try to catch up, Yuuri.  _

\---

Chris followed with a 105.67. JJ making his comeback with a 110.42. 

And then it was Yuuri’s turn to impress. And he was beautiful. Hair slicked back and eyes sparkling. His costume clung to his body. The neckline plunged, showing the shape of Yuuri’s chest. The skin looked so inviting. Victor found himself wanting to slip a finger into the fabric and tug. A rosy nipple would surely peek out and he could envelope it in his mouth. 

But that wasn’t the most torturous aspect of the design. It was the way the fabric clung to the omega’s hips. Yuuri’s past costumes used loose trousers to make him appear mature. Victor had wanted the outfit to accentuate Yuuri’s footwork, so he had pushed for clingy material. Every toned muscle of Yuuri’s slender calves and round thighs was visible. Victor didn’t know he was making his own undoing in his choices.  

There was a quiver in Yuuri’s bones when he stood on the ice. He wasn’t sure if it was fear or excitement. Perhaps a bit of both. But Victor was right there beside him. He grabbed Yuuri’s hand and planted a kiss on the golden band around Yuuri’s ring. What he really wished to do was kiss Yuuri on the mouth. 

“Please watch me.”

“Of course, Yuuri”  

“If I can’t have your scent with me on the ice, I want your eyes on me.” 

What Yuuri did stunned him. The sweet omega grabbed his face and pressed his lips onto Victor’s forehead.  

“я люблю тебя.”  

“ 愛してる.” 

The words were said in unison. It made them both grin and laugh. Yuuri parted from Victor, leaving the alpha’s hand outstretched in his absence. He glided to the center of the ice. 

The music was heart wrenching. A soul searing violin that pulled Yuuri into motion. Each gesture profound, from the angle of his knees, to the arch of his back, and up to the tips of his fingers. The story one of longing. Of wanting to be held. Each step was so full of yearning. Victor watched, clinging to the railing of the rink. He wanted to be on the ice beside Yuuri. He wanted to be what Yuuri was reaching out for.  

The omega went into a spin, grabbing his foot and bringing it up towards his head in a Biellmann, a testament to his flexibility. 

As if the weight of his loneliness collapsed upon him, Yuuri sank beautifully into a sit spin. His head near the ice and his body moving so fast. But from his ache, he arose anew into stunning butterfly spin. From there a single blade rested on the ice while the other swayed and taunted in incredible footwork. Yuuri’s balance effortless. 

There was an emptiness in Yuuri. A soul crushing longing that was conveyed to everyone that watched. Eyes lidded with sorrow. 

_ I wish you were beside me. I wish you were mine forever. _

The music crescendoed and Yuuri’s step sequence shifted the story. Yuuri had found someone to answer his longing. But it was a dance of beautiful desperation. It was like the skater was on the ice with someone else. A ghost or a memory. And it was stunning. 

He saved all his combination spins for the end. A storm of motion and strength. Seven times he rose into the air as though completely weightless. Victor could see it, Yuuri was unbound. No suppressants to hold him back. 

_ I love you. I have always loved you.  _

A triple flip. His body moving fast, using his pick he went soaring again.

Somewhere from the rink, a usually stoic Yurio shouted with all his lungs “Davai!”  

It was Victor’s signature quad flip. And then again, he moved into another. Everyone was screaming. Katsuki Yuuri was a sight to behold.  

The music was slowing now. The skater had fought for his love. Done everything he could to win the affections as his own. Now he touched his own face. Eyes shut and savoring the sensation of skin. But it didn’t seem like Yuuri’s hands. The caress so tender that is was as though Victor himself was there. His heart racing as the omega swooped into an lunge. It looked like Yuuri was completely lost in the embrace of a lover. One more out reached hand, another arch of the back. 

Two blades parallel, his back fully arched away from his legs, right hand on his heart and left arm reaching towards Victor as though Yuuri were offering his heart to him. 

_ There will never be a day where I stop loving you. My heart is yours.  _

Yuuri came to a powerful stop into a layback Ina Bauer. The posture surely exhausting after all those spins and leaps. Even from where the Russian stood, he could see Yuuri’s muscles flex with every breath. 

_ I’m yours and you’re mine.  _

The crowd was howling, throwing flowers and dolls onto the ice. But Yuuri only had eyes for Victor. He skated to him as though he hadn’t just performed one of the most rigorous routines. And Victor was there to greet him with a crushing embrace.  

“Yuuri… you’re beautiful.”

\---

Victor and Yakov sat beside him at the kiss and cry. Yuuri’s knee shook nervously.  

113.32. 

Yuuri was in the lead. Victor embraced the omega excitedly. 

But Yuuri still didn’t have his glasses on. He couldn’t understand the announcer’s accent or see the score. He squinted past Victor’s head to the board, seeing nothing but a blur.  

“How did I do?” 

“You’re in first!” Victor didn’t even remember that cameras were on them. He pressed his lips against Yuuri’s soft cheek. “My Yuuri is in first!”

\--- 

Several interviewers approached Yuuri after his kiss and cry, asking about how it felt to be in the lead. Yuuri nervously scratched the back of his head and tried to express his gratitude at everyone who had helped him reach this point. He was humble but his competitive spark still there.  

“Yuuri… is it true that you’ve been lying about being a beta?” a microphone shoved in his face.  

“Eh?” 

“Aren’t you an omega?” 

Yuuri’s blood turned cold. An expression of sheer horror frozen on his face. 

“What…?” 

“An alpha from your St. Petersberg rink says you tempted him and then had him attacked by another alpha. Is that true?”

Victor stiffened beside him,. 

“Did you seduce Victor into being your coach?”

Yuuri’s complexion paled. 

“Why are you not bonded?”

“Are you pregnant with Victor’s child?" 

“How could you take Victor away from the ice?”  

Yuuri felt sick. The world was tilting. Voices muffled. He was drowning under the weight of his fear. 

“I… I…” 

“Why did you lie?”

“I never…” 

“Who else are you seducing?”

“Figure skating isn’t a place for an omega.”

They surrounded him. Swallowing him. Cutting Yuuri off from Victor. 

“What if your pheromones influence the other skaters? How can you be so selfish?” 

“Is that how you got your high score today?”

“I think that’s enough…” Victor stepped in, using his body as a wall between Yuuri and the encroaching journalists. He pushed them back with an outstretched arm. 

“Victor, did Yuuri seduce you? Did he trick you into becoming his coach?”

“What…? No, don’t be absurd.” 

“Enough…” Yakov stepped in now. “I think it’s best you two go back to the hotel.”

Victor tugged on Yuuri’s arm, but the omega was motionless like lead.  

“Yuuri… we need to leave.”

Rigid and breathing fast. 

“Yuuri, please…”  

Victor never liked to use his pheromones to to get his way, but Yuuri was unmoving. He rubbed the back of Yuuri’s hand and let the pheromones do their work. 

_ Come with me _ . 

He pulled on Yuuri’s arm and lifelessly, the omega followed. 

Yakov held back the accusing reporters. 

Victor quickly tugged Yuuri to the changing room. It was empty, everyone still watching as Phichit took to the ice. He tore Yuuri’s costume off his body. He couldn’t find Yuuri’s duffle bag so instead he threw on his own Russian runner jacket onto the brunette. 

The door to the room creaked open and Victor took a protective stance, shielding Yuuri out of sight. Adrenaline and instinct guiding him. 

“Where’s Yuuri?” 

It was Yurio. 

“Yura, help me get him out of here.”

Yuuri’s eyes weren’t focusing on anything. He wasn’t even aware of where he was, too stunned to believe that this was real. 

They quickly dragged Yuuri out of the room, into the hall, heading towards the exit. 

“Yuuri-san!” Minami appeared. “Where are you going? Aren’t you going to watch the rest of the tournament?” the newly presented alpha sounded hurt. He had wanted Yuuri to see his performance. 

“Yuuri isn’t feeling well, Minami.” Victor answered for Yuuri. 

“Wait…” but Victor couldn’t wait. Eyes were latching onto Yuuri. The omega’s breathing completely erratic.  

They took a taxi back to the hotel. The car ride was short but Yuuri started to gasp as if he wasn’t getting enough air. Full body tremors and tears spilling. 

Everything he had just achieved undone by something so uncontrollable as his body’s secondary gender. It hurt to breathe. To think. 

\---

Back in the hotel room, Victor did everything he could think for grounding Yuuri. He whispered words of encouragement. Offered water. Tried to ease Yuuri into the soft bed. But the omega was as detached as ever. 

Yurio was there too, using words that were uncharacteristically kind and reassuring. 

“Victor… it’s not working! He’s not responding!”

“I don’t know…” 

“Use your pheromones.” 

“...What?”  

“I’ve seen how he relaxes with your pheromones. Scent him.”

“But… but Yakov said…”

“If you won’t do it, I will.”

The threat of another’s scent on Yuuri proved too much. The alpha leaned into the headboard of the bed, collecting Yuuri into his arms. Gently, he let his scent coil onto Yuuri. 

It felt strange having Yurio in the room. His blue eyes on them in what was usually such an intimate moment.

Yuuri’s head laxed and rolled onto Victor’s shoulder. His breath slowing down.  

“Yuuri… Yuuri are you alright?” 

“I… I…” Finally speaking words. 

“It’s alright.” 

“No! No it’s not alright!” Yuuri hiccuped as fear and tears threatened to spill.  

“Shh… I won’t let them hurt you.”

But it wasn’t himself he was afraid for. The reporters had implied that Yuuri had ruined Victor. That he had tempted the alpha away from the ice for his own personal gain. 

Yuuri’s identity as an omega had only ever hurt himself. 

“How… how did they find out…?”  

“About that…” Yurio shifted awkwardly. His behavior indicating that he knew but didn’t want to say.

“Please…” 

“That alpha that attacked us… he met with a reporter. It’s all over the internet. The article went up just before your short.”

“What did he say…?”

“Yuuri…” Victor didn’t think this best.

“I need to know.” 

“He lied. He said you seduced him but then had an alpha attack him by punching him in the throat.” 

“And… and they believed him didn’t they…” 

It was heart wrenching to hear Yuuri say that. It wasn’t a question at all. Yuuri knew. He was an omega that had hidden his secondary gender. No one would believe him. 

“What else did they say…?” 

“Yuuri…” Victor didn’t want Yuuri to know. Not now or ever. 

“Please…” 

“They think you… with Victor… That you seduced him too.”

“They think I’m a slut don’t they…” He knew how this played out. He could only imagine the scathing remarks that were piling up against him. The same had happened with celebrities that chose not to share their omega status.  

He remembered being a teen when his favorite singer was outed. Yuuri didn’t know that he would be an omega at the time. But he recalled the words written about the musician to be vile. Completely degrading. And now it was happening to him. 

“Yuuri… Yuuri we’ll fix this.” Victor wished that he had finished what he started with that alpha. He remembered the feeling of the man’s throat under his fingers. If only he had squeezed tighter. He would have never gotten the chance to hurt Yuuri again. 

Yuuri tried to pull away from Victor. The guilt of what he had done to Victor’s image was too heavy. 

“Yuuri… Please…”  _ Don’t push me away.  _ “I won’t let them hurt you.”

“It’s not me that I’m afraid for, Victor… I knew this would happen someday. I just didn’t think it would hurt you too… and oh! What if they drag Yurio into this!” 

“They can try, but it won’t work,” the blond put on a brave face. 

Yuuri remembered the doctor’s words. How it appeared that he was wrapping alphas around his fingers for his owns satisfaction. Is that how everyone would see him now? 

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…”  

“Katsudon, they can’t hurt me.” Yurio sat on the bed beside him. “They can’t hurt you either.” 

“You can’t be sure…”

“You said you trusted me… That you trusted the both of us. And we trust you.” Yurio took Yuuri’s hand into his own. It was strange how the older man’s hands were so small. 

“You’re stronger than them all, Yuuri.” Victor pressed his forehead into the side of Yuuri’s face. He let his pheromones soothe.  

“How can you be so sure…”  

“Because you’re Yuuri…” 

\---

Yakov knocked at the door. When he stepped in he saw Yuuri bundled in Victor’s arms. He knew how close they were but had never seen them entangled that way. Seeing it made perfect sense to the old beta. They were made for eachother. 

“There’s a ruckus in the lobby of reporters. I overheard them and it seems they know what room Yuuri is staying in. I’ve arranged for you both to go to a different one.”

“Yakov… I’m sorry… I didn’t think it would happen like this… I won’t let them drag your name into this, I swear.”

“Yuuri… don’t apologize. You just skated one of the most stunning shorts I’ve ever seen. I’ll be damned if they try to hurt one of my students.” 

It was always assumed that Yakov was coaching Yuuri as well. But he had never addressed Yuuri as one of his students. A quick breath escaped Yuuri’s throat. The sentiment meant so much to him. That he was still wanted even though he was an outed omega. 

“Here’s the key. It’s on the fourth floor.” 

“Thank you, Yakov.” Yuuri meant it with all of his being. _Thank you for the help. Thank you for not turning me away._  

They gathered their belongings and head to the elevator. Victor stayed close to Yuuri, who looked like he was about to faint at any moment. 

The door opened up with Minami, JJ, and Chris were on board. A seemingly unlikely trio. 

“Yuuri… Are you alright?” Chris’ tone implied that he knew. Yuuri averted his eyes. He couldn’t meet the man’s gaze.  

They stepped into the elevator 

“Yuuri-san! Are you feeling better?” Minami on the other hand was still in the dark. 

“Oh… yes. I’m sorry I missed your short.” 

“I’m glad you’re feeling better! You’ll just have to make it up to me with tomorrow’s free skate!”  Yuuri just nodded, not trusting his voice to carry out words.  

The back of his throat stung as he held back sobs. How could he go on the ice tomorrow? Would they even let him skate? This was unprecedented.  

“Is everything ok?” Chris was moreso asking Victor, seeing Yuuri’s reluctance to even look at him.

“It’s going to be alright…” 

JJ was silent, but his eyes bore holes into the back of Yuuri’s head. 

The elevator doors were shutting when a hand slipped through the closing gap. The doors parted again. A man standing there, furiously shaking. 

“I found him.” 

Rapid footsteps against the carpeted floors approached. 

 “Yuuri Katsuki, what do you have to say for yourself?” several microphones were shoved into the entrance of the elevator. 

There was no place to run.  

“What’s going on?” Minami asked.  

“Are you stringing along all of these alphas?” 

Cameras clicked and flashed.  

“Is Victor not enough for you?” 

It must have looked so suspicious. Yuuri in an elevator with five other alphas. The omega tried to back away but JJ was behind him. 

“Leave us alone,” Yurio snarled. 

“Even children, Mr. Katsuki?” 

Yuuri’s eyes darted back and forth. There was no place to run. 

Questions piled on top of one another until it was an unintelligible cascade of accusatory shouts. 

“You’re nothing but a whore!” There was a sudden movement. The next thing Yuuri knew, something wet was splashed into his face. It stung his eyes and throat. “Now you’ll know your place.” 

“Yuuri!” 

A vial clattered onto the elevator floor and whoever had thrown it gone. 

Yuuri felt hot. Like he was burning from the inside out. He tried to rub the substance away but that just spread it across his hands and face. He coughed as the air turned to humid bile in the back of his throat.   

And then it hit him like a wall. Dizziness. Skin burning. Slick dripping down his thighs. 

Heat. 

Victor and Yurio quickly covered their mouths but that didn’t stop the cardamom and honeysuckle. In such a small space, it thickened the air. 

“Yuuri-san… you’re… you’re an… omega?” Minami’s body quivered. His eyes dilated. The newly presented alpha’s breath ragged. 

Chris bent down and picked up the vial on the floor.  

“This… this causes heat symptoms,” he choked out after reading the label. It was hard even for him, a bonded alpha to breathe. 

Victor felt his inner alpha churn inside him. He wasn’t faring any better than Minami. His teeth ached to be in Yuuri’s neck. 

_ Bite him. Consume him. Mate him.  _

Yuuri’s legs gave out. The slick and feeling of emptiness too much for his body. JJ caught him. Victor wanted to lunge at the alpha but he knew that if he moved, he would just push himself obscenely against Yuuri. 

The omega’s greatest fears becoming reality one after one. He was outed. And now he was on the edge of a heat without suppressants or even the comfort of being alone. They could all see him for what he really was. 

“You guys take him… I’ll get rid of the reporters,” the Canadian finally spoke. He handed Yuuri to Chris and then used his tall frame to push back the intruders as he got off. They pushed against the alpha, but it seemed futile. JJ was always one to play the role of a hero. The doors shut.

Each of Yuuri’s breaths ushered out more scent. His slick seeping through his clothes. 

“Yuuri-san…” Minami couldn’t resist anymore. Yuuri smelled too sweet and the flush on his face too inviting. He dove towards Yuuri. 

“Minami, stop!” Chris tried to hold up Yuuri while fending off the young alpha. 

“What… what just happened?” Yurio tried to help push back Minami, but the Japanese alpha was incredibly strong with his new towering body. 

“They must have poured heat inducers on Yuuri… It causes the symptoms of a heat in omegas. It isn’t a real heat though… not if we act fast enough.” He couldn’t fight off Minami and hold onto Yuuri. “Victor, please!” 

“I… I can’t…” Victor immediately regretting speaking. The air that rushed into his lungs made his thoughts hazy. His arousal pressing against his pants. If he wasn’t careful, he would tear Yuuri’s clothes off and take him there in the elevator, in front of everyone like an animal. 

“How do we fix this?” Yurio’s head was more clear than Victor’s.  

“Yuuri needs to mate.” 

Minami lunged harder at those words. 

“No… no…!” Yuuri gasped. His throat felt too raw to protest. He didn’t want to. Not like this. 

“Or at least, we need to make his body think it has…” 

Minami’s arms were long and lashed out for Yuuri. They reached his collar and tugged. 

Victor slammed Minami against the elevator wall, knocking the air out of him. Minami may be an alpha, but he was nothing in comparison to Victor.  

“Don’t. Touch. Yuuri.” His face was contorted into a snarl. His fingers at the skater’s throat.

“Suppressants!” Minami gasped. His mind unfogged for a moment by the pain of Victor’s crushing grip.

“What?” Victor hissed. 

“I have alpha suppressants in my bag! Please… I can’t stand it anyone. Yuuri-san’s scent... it hurts!” Minami admired Yuuri. He even longed for him. His room back in Japan covered in posters of the brunette. Now his inner alpha was absolutely ecstatic that Yuuri was an omega. But he saw how Yuuri recoiled from him. It hurt him but the thought of Yuuri hating him far more painful.

Yurio rummaged through Minami’s bag found them. He smashed several pills into the alpha’s mouth. 

“Victor… we need to act fast. Yuuri’s slipping.”

“I can’t… I’ll hurt him…” his grip on Minami didn’t lessen. 

“If you can’t then someone will have to.” 

“Chris…” Victor was on the edge of a rut. He could feel his skin prickle. 

“What about Yurio… can you?”

“Wh… what?” Yurio was stunned at the question.

“No… no one will touch him.” Victor knew that wasn’t what Yuuri wanted. That Yuuri wanted none of this. But mostly, he couldn’t stomach anyone else touching Yuuri. Rubbing their pheromones on Yuuri. Putting their hands on him. It made him growl. 

“Take… take some of Minami’s suppressants. But not too many. You’ll need to use your pheromones. Just enough to help you resist.”  

“I barely keep my hands off him when I can’t smell him, Chris.”

Chris had never seen Victor so frightened. So consumed and full of desire. 

Yuuri was getting tunnel vision. Voices around him fading away to a ringing in his ears. The ache of being empty the only thing he could truly feel. 

He passed out. 

Yurio caught him in an awkward embrace. His body buzzing from Yuuri’s warmth. The scent of slick filling his nostrils. His throat bobbed as he swallowed. He could feel the dampness of Yuuri’s wetness against his leg. 

“Do you want him to suffer a heat Victor? He’ll forfeit his free tomorrow.”  

“No…” 

“Then either have Yurio do it or do it yourself.” 

“I… I’ll do it.” 

\---

Minami bolted out of the elevator the moment the doors opened. Yurio and Chris both dragged Yuuri into their new hotel room. Victor couldn’t touch Yuuri. Not until the suppressants worked. As much as he hated their hands on Yuuri, he couldn’t trust himself. 

They found the door and shuffled inside quickly. 

Yurio placed Yuuri’s overheated body onto the bed. Even unconscious, the effect of the drug ravaged him. His chest quivered, eyebrows furrowed in pain, hands clenched into tight fists. 

“Victor… you’re going to have to make his body think it’s being mated.” 

The suppressants were fast acting, but even then the Russian’s eyes were dilated to the point they no longer looked blue. 

A whimper fled Yuuri’s throat. The sound making Victor’s groin twitch. 

“Can you do this…?” Both Chris and Yurio were looking at him. “You don’t have much time until this becomes a real heat.” 

With trembling legs, Victor sat onto the bed next to his sleeping omega.  

“Victor…” Yurio wanted to say something, but he wasn’t sure what. He didn’t like leaving the two of them alone like this. Yuuri was in no shape to resist and Victor was straining himself not to hurt the man he so clearly loved. What if Victor bonded him? What if Victor mated with him?  

What if Yuuri couldn’t skate anymore?  

This whole thing was wrong. Yuuri being outed. Yuuri being forced to the edge of a heat. 

“You should both leave…” 

“Can you be alone with him?”  

Of course he couldn’t. 

“Yuuri wouldn’t want you to see him like this.” And it was true. Yuuri would never be able to look them in the face. Victor wasn’t even sure Yuuri would forgive him for what he was about to do. 

“Please be careful…” Yurio finally left Yuuri’s side. The two alphas left the pair alone and closed the door behind them. 

Victor took a deep breath to clear his head. But Yuuri’s rich honeysuckle just made him dizzier.  

Gingerly he tugged at Yuuri’s clothes. He could feel how hot Yuuri was even through fabric. The alpha removed Yuuri’s shirt and pants. He was left with Yuuri’s shorts and he was shaking. The scent getting stronger with just the underwear left.  

Yuuri’s body was flushed. Each breath made his muscles stretch against his skin erotically. 

Victor peeled away the last barrier. Yuuri’s underwear soaked in slick. Victor swallowed. 

He had to make Yuuri’s body think it was being mated.  

Victor put his hands on Yuuri thighs and spread them apart. He was framed by them now. The sensation of skin against skin electric.  

The scent so potent. Victor’s body ached as he saw the quickly growing stain beneath Yuuri.  

The omega’s breath hitched as Victor spread Yuuri’s body even more open. His hands prying to expose Yuuri’s entrance. He rubbed a finger there, feeling the slick gush around. The muscles twitched. 

He groaned, his erection pulsing. 

The finger pushed inside. Yuuri’s walls pulled him in. It was so much warmer than he thought it would be. So wet and tight. He couldn’t help but imagine his arousal pushing inside.  

He pressed on, moving two knuckles deep. The pads of his fingers feeling the ridges inside Yuuri. 

Yuuri moaned. 

“Yuuri… oh Yuuri…” Victor’s eyes darted across the omega’s body. His alpha howling. 

_ Take what should have always been yours. _

He plunged in the finger completely. 

“Ah!” Yuuri’s own arousal twitched. Victor had been with omegas before, but none were as rosy colored between the legs as Yuuri. He wanted to take Yuuri into his mouth. To have Yuuri’s fingers in his silver hair, begging. 

He took his finger out. The slick was smooth, translucent and slightly thicker than water. Curiously, he rolled it between his fingers and spread his digits apart. The substance stretched between the gaps of his fingers, clinging erotically. Victor wanted to put it in his mouth and taste it, but he knew his restraint would become nothing more than a faint memory.  

He pushed in again, this time two. The second intrusion proved harder. Yuuri had never been with anyone and Victor’s fingers were thicker and longer than his own. Gradually, he pulled out letting his fingers drag against the omega’s walls. Yuuri’s breath quivered. 

_ So you like it when I pull out? _

This time, he was less careful. Victor plunged his fingers in. He could feel Yuuri’s walls obediently spread open around his touch. 

Yuuri cried out. 

_ Ah… there it is... _

“Vic... Victor?” cinnamon brown eyes open. 

Yuuri’s insides spasmed, tightening around Victor’s fingers as their eyes locked. Hot slick pooled down Victor’s wrist.

“Victor… What… what’s happening?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've written eros type things in the past, but I always get nervous. Is it well written? Does it convey how the emotions I want to and it's not just smut for the sake of smut? 
> 
> And is this also considered a cliff hanger? If it is, I'm incredibly sorry. I never thought I would be the type of writer to use these so often. But the chapter was getting too long and it seemed like the perfect place to stop! 
> 
> I hope the skating scenes made sense and weren't pure gibberish. I take figure skating lessons but extremely casually. I obviously can't create a routine but I wanted there to be stories and emotions in the short like in the show. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! Also, I've made a silly twitter account just for my silly ice boy romance stories. It's the same username: Dazzledghosts. 
> 
> Next chapter will be full of eros. And more skating! 
> 
> Wishing you all the best,
> 
> -DazzledGhosts


	11. The Touch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delay! This was oddly a hard chapter to write. I usually post weekly. But I will post some sneak peaks and the like over at the twitter I've made for this: dazzledghosts. 
> 
> Now... as promised, it's eros time! 
> 
> Thanks for all the comments and for sticking with me despite that cliffhanger. I loved reading everything you guys had to say. I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Yuuri was burning. This sensation so familiar. Skin prickling. Glands searing. Slick coating his thighs. Not quite a heat but on the precipice of one. His body begging to be claimed. 

But Yuuri didn’t want his body to be touched let alone claimed by anyone. He only wanted those pale hands on him. That heart shaped mouth planting kisses. Those blue eyes looking at him. Bergamot and rain filling him. No one else but him.

But there was this delicious feeling inside him. Something firm that rubbed at the ache. That hollowness being stroked away. Yuuri wanted more. He wanted to be full. 

And then he felt an immense pleasure with his whole being. Bright sparks of searing pleasure. His mouth parting as a cry spilled past his lips. Yuuri could never reach that deep with his small fingers. Brown eyes shot open. 

Something was _inside_ him.  

The first thing he saw was Victor’s silver hair. It spilled onto his face but couldn’t hide the pained expression the alpha had. Yuuri nearly weeped in relief that Victor was there. But why did he look so hurt? 

“Vic... Victor? 

The alpha looked up, blue eyes wide with fear and an emotion that Yuuri couldn’t name.

Before he could speak, Yuuri felt his insides clamp down on whatever it was that made him feel so good. Slick gushing out with the pressure. 

Yuuri felt fear. His body acting so shamelessly in front of Victor. But mostly he felt the need to be filled.

Brown eyes trailed down Victor’s figure. From the alpha’s strained expression, to his shoulders and down his arms until… Until the place where they were connected. Victor’s fingers inside him.  

“Victor… What… what’s happening?” 

\---

Yuuri was so beautiful. So utterly smooth. So bare. And soft. He watched as the omega began to realize the precarious position their bodies were. Those brown eyes widened the moment they trailed down to where they were connected.  

He needed to fix this before Yuuri hated him. 

“Yuuri… I know this doesn’t look good. Please let me explain.” Victor’s voice was shaking. Partially out of desire but mostly out of fear. 

He had dreamed of touching Yuuri this way. Victor wanted this more than anything. But this wasn’t how it was suppose to be. The alpha was a romantic at heart. This was suppose to be in their shared home. Not here in some strange hotel room full of scents that weren’t theirs. He wanted to give Yuuri some profound gesture of his love. To see a smile on Yuuri’s face and then lovingly drape the omega across his bed. In his daydreams, Yuuri wanted him. Not because their biology willed it. Not because they were alpha and omega. And especially not because Yuuri was forced so brutally into a heat. 

And how frightened he must be! As is, a heat is terrifying. But to be dragged into one completely unprepared was beyond cruel.  

Yuuri’s frame quivered as another wave of slick spilled onto Victor’s knuckles. 

“Ah!” Yuuri stiffened, trying to resist. How sweet those sounds were. 

“Someone poured heat inducers on you, Yuuri… If you don’t mate… or make your body thinks it’s being mated, you’ll go into a heat.”

“No…” Yuuri hated heats. And he couldn’t have one now. Not when he was so close to skating beside Victor again. 

“I… I know you can’t really consent, Yuuri. I know this looks bad. I don’t know what I’m suppose to do, but I’m trying to stop the heat as fast as I can.”

“No!” Yuuri didn’t want to feel the emptiness for days on end. The memory of being so hollow, of how his inner walls rubbed against each other while he pathetically fucked himself on his fingers… he despised all of it. 

Victor took Yuuri’s words as rejection. It stung him but if Yuuri didn’t want it, he would stop and go take care of his own arousal in the bathroom. Even with alpha suppressants his own body and will were crumbling. This would absolutely lead into a rut. But the pain of losing Yuuri would devastate him more than anything else his body could do to him. 

He started to pull his fingers out. Yuuri’s breath shuddered. 

_That’s right… you like the sensation of pulling out,_ Victor thought mournfully. 

“No! Don’t!” 

“Yuuri, I’m stopping. I’m taking it out, it’s alright. I won’t touch you.” It hurt so much. 

“No!” 

Yuuri’s hands grabbed Victor’s wrist. Victor waited for Yuuri to shove him away.

“Please… don’t… don’t…” Yuuri gripped and pulled back in. Surprise taking hold of the alpha. Victor felt Yuuri’s walls part for him as he was ushered inside once more. Yuuri pushed him in so deep, his fingers couldn’t slide in further. Yuuri’s face wracked with embarrassment. “Don’t take them out…” Tears spilling down his face, completely avoiding Victor’s eyes. 

“Yuuri… Oh, Yuuri…” The alpha drew out the vowels of the omega’s name. Victor didn’t think he could get more aroused. “I won’t hurt you… I promise I won’t…”

“You’ve never hurt me Victor… you never will…” Yuuri’s voice drenched in need. Even now, so trusting. 

“Yuuri…” Victor almost whimpered. A sound so un-alpha like. But he didn’t care. He was with Yuuri. Yuuri who would always see him for what he was. Saw him beyond his secondary gender. Beyond the perfect image of Victor that everyone expected.

But this moment left Victor with nothing but doubt. Was Yuuri lost to the haze of almost heat? Would he hate Victor for what he was doing? And could Victor resist claiming Yuuri? Should he even continue? Would it be crueler to let him suffer a heat?  

“Yuuri… take deep breaths for me, alright?” He tried to tug Yuuri’s hands off his wrist. But even now, Yuuri was strong.  

“You won’t… won’t stop?” Yuuri was slipping. He could hear it in the omega’s voice and smell it in the thick aroma. If he didn’t move fast enough, this heat would become real. No amount of alpha suppressants would stop Victor then. His rut would ensue and with no barriers between them, he would mate Yuuri. Fill him, knot him… impregnate him. 

He needed to stop those thoughts.  

“Oh Yuuri, of course not... I’ll take care of you. I promise.” 

Only then did Yuuri’s grip slacken. 

He began to inch his fingers out, letting them drag along Yuuri’s walls. Slow, make sure Yuuri could savor the feeling. Victor feared that this would be his first and only time touching Yuuri this way. He needed the omega remember Victor’s touch as something pleasurable.  

Victor pushed in fast. Hit right where it gave Yuuri stars in his vision. The omega arched his back, mounting himself deeper onto Victor’s fingers. One hand gripping the pillow behind him, the other clenched into a fist on his chest. Yuuri was so beautiful.

“Yuuri… you’re doing so well…” Victor wanted to encourage. To ease Yuuri’s fear away. He could smell it in Yuuri’s honeysuckle. 

Yuuri’s erection twitched and his omega scent seeped in approval. 

_ Oh…! You like being praised! _

“I’m going to add another. Is that alright, Yuuri? I know you can take it…”

Yuuri nodded. Being filled by Victor was all he wanted.  

He slipped in another finger. Yuuri’s insides shaped around Victor’s three digits. The omega gasping. Touching himself had never felt nearly this good. 

“That’s it…” he coaxed. He spread his fingers apart, stretching Yuuri’s insides, grazing where he knew Yuuri liked it most.  

Slick flowed ceaselessly now. A steady stream of the richest cardamom and honeysuckle soaking the bed beneath him.  

Victor’s alpha incredulous that he wasn’t claiming his omega. 

_ There’s nothing stopping you! He’s submitting! Take him! Take what’s always been yours! _

His teeth ached and Yuuri was so  _ warm _ . He knew his resolve was weak.

_ Why won’t you end this pain? Make him your mate? He wants this! Look at him! His neck is there for your taking! _

The alpha inside him clawed at his chest. For the first time in his life, it felt like there was a real beast tearing at him. One wrong move and Victor would be lost to it. Never before had Victor fought so hard against his instinct. Not even in his rut. But Yuuri was here before him. So loving. So trusting. Victor would let his alpha render his innards to shreds if it meant not hurting Yuuri.  

Victor raised his own arm and using his teeth pulled back his sleeve. His mouth parted, descending down to bite. 

“No!” Yuuri took Victor’s hand in his, their fingers interlocking. 

“Yuuri… Yuuri I can’t stop… I’m scared…” Blue eyes losing focus. He tugged back with all his strength only to find that it wouldn’t budge. 

The omega put his own arm to Victor’s lips. The skin so soft and warm against his mouth. 

“Yuuri…!” Lips brushing against creamy skin as the sounds left his mouth.  

“Please… I don’t want to hurt… ah! To hurt Victor anymore than I have…” he managed to say between the most inviting of moans and gasps. 

“Yuuri… I can’t…”

“I want you to…”

His restraint was nothing more than a distant thought. He clamped down with his hot mouth on Yuuri’s forearm. Teeth sank in as skin gave away to Victor’s bite. Yuuri moaned. It wasn’t the omega’s scent gland nor would it become a bond mark, but the taste of honeysuckle, copper, and cardamom in his mouth eased the need. The alpha part of him wasn’t satisfied. Yuuri still wasn’t his. But the initial urge to claim softer now. Less adamant. His mouth slackened and he released Yuuri. Blood smeared across the alpha’s mouth, like bright red lipstick.  

All the while, fingers still moving in and out, scraping and spreading Yuuri’s innards. 

But this wasn’t enough. Yuuri’s body needed to think Victor was mating him. 

“Yuuri… don’t be afraid… but I’m going to have to do something less than ideal, alright?”  

“I trust you, Victor...” his voice quivered.

Victor unzipped his pants and reached into his boxers. He pulled himself out, thick and swollen with absolute need. The cold air doing nothing to ease his desire. 

Yuuri had seen Victor naked before in their baths at Hasetsu. But he had always shied away from looking at him so intimately. But now, they were so close. He could see Victor was large even for an alpha. His arousal dripping and red. The thought of that inside him made his walls press down on the alpha’s touch. Another rush of slick pulsing out of him. 

Victor’s free hand slipped around his own length. His fingers barely able to wrap around the size. The omega’s breath shuddered. The alpha’s hand mimicked the motion of his fingers inside Yuuri. Blue eyes firmly on the brunette, devouring every sight he couldn’t touch. He thrusted into his palm, clearly imagining himself inside Yuuri. 

“Ah… Yuuri…” The alpha’s face drunk with desire and all of it was for Yuuri. It made the omega quiver.

Heavy pheromones reached out to Yuuri, seething in nothing but arousal. 

The omega rocked himself against Victor’s fingers.

“Oh god… Yuuri!” Victor couldn’t suppress his voice. Yuuri’s body moving under him. Those muscles rippling under soft skin. He wanted to touch Yuuri. To lick and leaves trails of kisses behind. But to touch him anymore than this would be his ruin. His lack of contact beyond fingers inside the omega completely intentional. Even a chaste kiss would send him over the edge. 

And Yuuri was so defenseless. In that moment so malleable to an alpha’s desires.  

“You’re beautiful, Yuuri…” 

Yuuri seemed to glow at his praise. 

“ я люблю тебя.”

The bed creaked. Yuuri’s insides squelched loudly around his fingers. Victor grunting. Yuuri panting with sweet “ahs” between shuddering breaths. They made the most obscene sounds. 

Heat coiling in Yuuri’s belly. 

In. Out. In. Out. 

The omega looked up at his alpha. Those blue eyes lost in desire. That dusk rose mouth shaping Yuuri’s name silently. 

Fingers curled up inside him.

“Oh… Victor… I’m...!” Yuuri’s entire body shuddered as he came violently onto his own chest. Victor hadn’t even touched Yuuri’s arousal and he still came from those adept hands. 

Hearing Yuuri choke out his name was enough. He released himself onto Yuuri’s stomach. White cum streaking the creamy skin. His scent of bergamot and rain drastically heavier, soaking into Yuuri. 

Victor took his fingers out of Yuuri’s puckered entrance, savoring the feeling of Yuuri’s velvet walls for what he assumed the last time. He smeared the excess slick on his hands with his own semen on Yuuri’s chest. The scent of Victor’s cum mixed with Yuuri’s slick. It was a perfume thick in the omega’s lungs. 

“Yuuri… you’re doing so well. Now breathe deeply. Slowly…”  

Yuuri did as told. 

“That’s my, Yuuri…” Victor sounded so proud. Yuuri beamed at being praised. 

Victor rubbed the mixture of fluids onto Yuuri’s chest, almost as if he hoped the liquids would permeate the flesh. 

Slowly, the burn faded. The scent of Victor’s alpha seed on him soothed his senses. He still felt the echo of Victor’s touch inside him. The haze dissipating but the tingling persistent. 

And with that came the ache from a rush of hormones and pheromones. His mind becoming clearer with the pain, realizing the gravity of what had just happened. What he had forced Victor to do.

“Victor…” There it was. The twinge of something that sounded like regret to Victor. The alpha moved to sit on the edge of the bed. 

“Your… your body?” he asked, hoping it would delay what would surely be Yuuri’s rejection.  

“I’m… sore but… no heat...” was all Yuuri could think of saying. He was so aghast at how he had behaved. And oh god, his pheromones? Did he drive Victor to a rut? Had Victor even wanted to touch him like that? “You’re not… you know…?” 

“Hm…? Oh… a rut? No… I took some alpha suppressants. They helped me from…” he let the sentence trail off. They both knew what Victor’s alpha wanted to do.  

The silence ebbed. Yuuri propped himself up. The bite on his arm stung, the sensation even more poignant with his body in the after effects of a pheromone surge. He unknowingly whimpered.  

Victor saw it. How the skin was swollen from his teeth.  

“Yuuri… Yuuri, I’m sorry.” Victor broke.  

_ Don’t hate me. _

 “I couldn’t stop them from hurting you. And I couldn’t stop myself.” He crumbled into himself. His back to Yuuri, elbows propped on his knees, hands fisting his silver hair tightly. “I know you couldn’t consent but I didn’t know what else to do... I understand if you hate…” 

Bed sheets rustled. Arms wrapped around Victor. So warm. So soft. But he could see the wound on Yuuri’s arm closer now in this embrace. Blood pooling in the indentations left behind by his teeth.

“Victor… Don’t… you didn’t hurt me. Not now, not ever.”

Victor wasn’t use to crying. He didn’t know what to do with his face. Trying to hold back his tears just stung his throat.  

“You’re arm… and everything I did…”

“I asked you to. And you stopped my heat, Victor.” His hold tightened on Victor. “Thank you…” 

Tears quietly spilled down his face and onto Yuuri’s arms. 

“You’re don’t…” _Hate me? Regret it?_  

“Victor, this was all a bit out of order. I regret how they started it with the heat inducers but not that it happened with you... I’m happy it was Victor.” 

The alpha shrugged Yuuri’s arms off and spun around. 

“You…” 

Yuuri was so beautiful that the words escaped him. Brown eyes sparkling with so much affection but also with so much self doubt. Lips parted, still feeling the aftermath of the pleasure Victor had given his body.

Yuuri was the one reassuring him. After all he had been through. Being outed. Being cornered. Being insulted. And then…  being coerced into a heat.  

“Oh Yuuri…” he pressed his forehead against the brunette’s, feeling the cold sweat on the skin from all that they had done together, but he didn’t dislike that. “ я люблю тебя.”

He ached to kiss Yuuri. But their scents were still entangled and Yuuri’s neck completely bare. He couldn’t endure much more. His inner alpha sulking and still howling. 

_ You can’t resist this forever. You can’t keep me from what should be ours.  _

“Victor… I… I still want to skate.” The Russian pulled back and looked deeply into Yuuri’s face. Even though they had just narrowly dodged a heat, Yuuri’s body would surely hurt just to move. But regardless, he was dazzling and so resilient.  _ How can you be so strong?  _

“I… I want that too.” 

“I don’t want them to take it away from me. Skating has been my life. And it’s brought me to you, Victor. I can’t think of a day where I can’t do it. Where I can’t be on the same ice as you…” Yuuri’s soft hand pushed Victor’s silver bangs to the side. “I want to show them that being what I am… an omega… doesn’t mean that I’m weak.” 

“Alpha, beta, or omega… you’re the strongest person I’ve ever met. Let’s show them that, Yuuri.”

“What if they won’t let me on the ice, tomorrow?” 

“Yuuri… I won’t let that happen.”

\---

Yuuri took a shower and then rested on the bed. It was Victor’s turn to wash off the pheromones from their heated intimacy. 

He knew he shouldn’t, but Yuuri grabbed his phone and scrolled through it. The articles written about him seemed to bloom all across the internet. They painted him as a harlot. So many of them saying he was ruining Victor. He had imagined what being outed would feel like. He even thought he was prepared for it. But he was so wrong. Nothing could prepare him for this. 

Not to say there wasn’t any kindness. There were plenty of comments cheering Yuuri on. So many omegas full of excitement that someone like them could make it so far. But even that still stung Yuuri. “You’ve done so well for an omega.” He wanted to be more than an omega. Even though he was generally gentle, Yuuri was incredibly competitive. 

Many comments demanded that Yuuri step down. Others promised to boycott the ISU if they turned Yuuri away. To see people fighting for him certainly helped ease the hurt. But they were so swiftly drowned out by every whore, slut, and omega-bitch Yuuri was called. 

“He’s not worthy of Victor!”

“I bet you he’s fucking Yuri Plisetsky too! They’re way too close. How’s that legal?” 

“I’ll be honest, I wanna impregnate him. Did you see his Eros short? He’s begging to be mated like a bitch in heat.”  

“Yuuri must have used his pheromones to trick Victor! Victor’s the perfect alpha and deserves better than a slut omega.” 

“I don’t think I can look at Victor the same anymore. Why’d he pick this omega? Yuuri’s so boring.” 

It hurt… It hurt so much. Ever since he presented, he fought being an omega. The suppressants poisoned him. The patches burned his skin. The heats ruined him. It would have been so much easier to just be what he was born to be. To give into what was expected of him.  

Yuuri fought back tears till the point his vision blurred. It didn’t work. He heard them softly plop onto the bed covers. 

He wanted to go back to the days he thought he was a beta. 

A knock at the door.

He jumped at the sound. Did the reporters find him again? How could they?  

Nervously he crawled out of the bed. Taking a deep breath, he pressed his face against the peephole.  

Yuuri recognized that bright yellow hair and sulking posture anywhere. 

The door swung open. 

The young alpha hadn’t expected Yuuri to answer. To be honest, he had fought with himself about checking on the pair. He didn’t know what would happen when he knocked on the door. Had they fixed Yuuri’s heat? Had Victor given into a rut and just taken everything Yuuri had to offer? Were the still entangled in one another’s embrace?  

But here he was, standing before a Yuuri wearing oversized pajamas. The omega’s face red and still streaked from hastily wiped away tears. Yuuri looked so weary.  

“Katsudon…” 

Yuuri ushered him in and closed the door behind him.  

Once inside, Yurio could smell it. The scent that both Yuuri and Victor would make as lovers. It was so heavy in the air. He would have prickled if it was any other alpha or omega. But this–whatever you could call it–was comforting. Both aromas so gentle and refreshing just like themselves. It made sense. Victor and Yuuri made perfect sense.  

The omega eased back onto the bed. His body heavy from everything it had endured.

“Are you… ok?”  

“Hm…? Oh… uh… I’m sore but I’ll still be able to skate tomorrow if...” Yuuri didn’t want to finish that sentiment. Instead he patted his hand on the bed, offering Yurio a seat. The alpha plopped beside him with all his weight. 

“No I mean… are you ok. With all this? I mean… I know you’re not ok. I guess that’s a stupid question. You can’t be ok. I’m not even sure what I’m trying to say, Katsudon.” He wanted Yuuri to be ok. More than anything, he wanted to never see the man so crumpled and defeated as he had when trapped in that elevator, forced into near heat. 

“I’ll be fine, Yurio…” 

“Then why are you crying?” Yurio touched the brunette’s face. A gesture that was strangely gentle for the blond. Yuuri didn’t even realize the tears were spilling. “Don’t lie to me.” 

“I’m scared… what if I can’t skate anymore? What if they drag you and Victor into this? I’ve already seen what they’re saying online. They think that I… with you… with Victor...”

“Don’t look at those! They’re just a bunch of idiots who don’t know what they’re saying!” Yurio was angry. He had hoped Yuuri would never see the comments so easily written under the veil of anonymity. “You’re none of those things that they’re saying! And if they try to stop you from skating, I won’t skate either!” 

“Same here… I’ll never step on the ice again,” Victor appeared with a towel around his waist, silver hair plastered around his face, and dripping wet from his muscular body onto the carpeted floor. 

“You two… you can’t!” 

“I don’t want to skate if Yuuri can’t.” The bed sank under the silver alpha’s weight as he brought himself close to Yuuri. “It has no meaning without you.”  

“I can’t let you do that. I don’t want this to hurt either of you… It’s bad enough I’m an omega…” 

“It doesn’t matter what you are! You’re a world record breaking figure skater!” Yurio was quaking with anger. But it wasn’t directed at Yuuri. “You’re in first place at this tournament!” 

“Yuuri you’ve taught Yurio and I that we’re more than just alphas. You’re so much more than an omega. You’re Yuuri…” Victor grabbed the brunette’s hand and pressed his lips against the golden ring wrapped around the omega’s finger. His touch so hot that it almost burned.  

“And don’t think I’m doing this for you. There’s no reason to skate if I can’t crush you…” Yurio added. As hard as he tried to imply animosity, the words came out affectionate. 

“Thank you… Thank you both…” Even though moving hurt so much, Yuuri grabbed both the alphas. Neither could think to resist, nor would they want to. They found themselves in Yuuri’s embrace. Yuuri’s left hand cupping the back of Yurio’s head while the other gripped tightly at Victor’s bare shoulder blade. They held back just as tightly onto the omega. “Thank you…” he whispered over and over.  

Yuuri’s family had always supported him. Being an omega in a family of betas was difficult for all of them yet they all loved him. How could they not? But to find people all on his own that felt the same meant the world to Yuuri. Here, in their arms, he wasn’t a burden. He wasn’t an omega.  

He was Yuuri. 

\---

“JJ, what do you think of the turn of events?” reporters hovering around the self proclaimed king.

“I will grab first place with my free skate, just you wait! It’s a brand new, never before seen JJ-Style!” he struck his pose.

“No… no I mean with Yuuri Katsuki. You were seen in the elevator with him and several other alphas? Was he using his pheromones against you?”

“What…?” JJ’s face was always chipper and confident, especially in front of an audience. But he looked so stunned. 

“Are you bothered that you have to skate on the same ice as an omega like Yuuri Katsuki?"

“I thinking nothing but highly of Yuuri. I admire him. Last year at the Grand Prix, I fell repeatedly. I experienced what I assume only Yuuri Katsuki knows. And after all that, he came back. He broke Victor Nikiforov’s world record and won the silver medal. And no one knew he was an omega then. What makes it so different now?” 

The reporters were stunned. The usually jovial king was serious.  

\---

The reporters swarmed around them as they tried to slip inside the Megasport Arena. Yakov and Victor used their larger bodies as walls. 

“Is it true you fell into a heat?” 

“Do you think the ISU will let you skate?”

“How are you here if you’re in your heat? Will you use your pheromones to win again?” 

“Victor, why haven’t you bonded with Yuuri?”

“Why did you lie about being a beta?” 

“Is Victor your alpha? Or are you with Yuri Plisetsky?” 

At the mention of his name, Yurio glared. He thought it was disgusting the way they pried into Yuuri’s life. Like it no longer belonged to Yuuri but to them. And for them to even suggest that Yuuri would lay hands on Yurio was absurd.  

Yurio struggled at making relationships. And as much as he pretended otherwise, this one was precious to him. The bond between him and Yuuri was theirs and theirs alone. 

He looked at the omega. Yuuri was clearly exhausted. And not just from the reporters hounding him for just one sound bite. His body must be reeling from the pheromones. 

As a younger alpha, Yurio had never experienced a full on rut. But he remembered how much he hurt from small ones. How keeping food down was impossible and everything was both too bright and too loud. He didn’t know how Yuuri could keep walking through the sea of shouting reporters as if nothing had happened.  

Once inside, they entered the section blocked off to reporters. Immediately Phichit ran towards them, arms open wide. 

“Yuuri! Yuuri are you alright?!” 

“Yes… I’m sorry if you got mixed into this.”

“Oh, Yuuri!” Phichit pulled him into a hug.

“You shouldn't! What if someone takes a picture of you, Phichit!” Yuuri didn’t want to drag the name of anyone else into this mess. 

“Yuuri! You’re my best friend. I don’t care what they say.” 

Yuuri’s lip quivered. Victor could see how Yuuri was swallowing his tears of relief. The alpha couldn’t help but put a reassuring hand on the Yuuri’s shoulder. 

“Yuuri, Victor! You’re both here.” Chris approached. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stop them from pouring the inducer on you.” The alpha had spent the night wondering if he had made the right choices. Should he have left Yuuri and Victor alone? He knew how much Victor desired Yuuri. He had faith in his old friend. Victor had always been the picture perfect alpha but seeing him slam Minami against the wall and hearing the quiver of fear in his voice made Chris doubt everything.  

_ You’ve never been so in love before, Victor.  _

But seeing them now, Chris knew. It couldn’t have been easy for either of them but they had persevered. 

“No… No I’m sorry I put you all in that position.” 

“Yuuri, please don’t apologize. We’ll find who did that to you. They won’t get away with assaulting you.”

“Oh… Oh I guess you’re right…” Yuuri hadn’t thought about that. He had been too preoccupied with his fear to register that he was assaulted. In the whirlwind of events, he had failed to see who did that to him. Nor could he fathom why. Was being an omega so vile? How had anything changed? He was the skater he always was. 

“Yakov and I have already asked for the hotel to send the footage of the elevator to the police,” Victor said, while adjusting a strand of Yuuri’s hair.  

_ I will never let them hurt you again _ .

\---

Yurio made Yuuri come out with him. “We’re going to clear this mess up.” They entered in the arena’s cold air. It was just open skate, but Yuuri’s heart pounded as if it sat in his throat. 

Victor was beside them. He wanted to be on the ice but he wasn’t competing in this cup. That didn’t stop him from being near Yuuri.

They neared the rink. Several bodies approached them like a barrier. 

“Mr. Katsuki, it’s come to our attention that you’re current… predicament… might not be suitable for the ISU to support.” 

It was happening. They were taking the ice away from him. He had thought of words to use to defend himself for this moment, but they dried out in his throat leaving behind the taste of acid. 

“Yuuri has just as much right to be on the ice than anyone else.” Yuuri was immensely grateful Victor spoke in his place. It was like his own voice was squeezed out of him. 

“Mr. Nikiforov, I hope you understand that this is unprecedented. We’re not quite sure how it happened in the first place. There’s never been someone of Mr. Katsuki’s… standing in our events.” Stiff lipped and set in their old ways. 

“If Yuuri doesn’t skate, I don’t skate.” Yurio said it, hoping his voice was firm enough to be taken seriously. 

“None of us will…” Chris was right there with them. His words spoken with more weight. “I’ve talked with Phichit, Minami, and even JJ. We all agree. Either Yuuri skates or no one will.” JJ was there as well, standing tall and proud. Phichit marched right beside his friend. Minami shyly stood close to the group.

“You guys... You can’t!”

“You would put your careers on the line for an omega?”

“For our friend,” Phichit corrected.  

“I can’t imagine how upset my fans will be if you let this happen. All our supporters really,” JJ’s smile sparkling and his demeanor playful but the threat noted. 

“If you do this, I’ll never step on the ice again.” Victor knew what he was doing. This wasn’t a moment to be humble. He was _the_ Victor Nikiforov. The most acclaimed and celebrated figure skater. For the ISU to turn him away would be catastrophic.  

There was a heavy silence.

“Fine. Don’t expect any preferential treatment, Mr. Katsuki,” and they left. 

“Preferential treatment…” Yuuri muttered. If he had received any treatment in regards to being an omega, preferential wasn’t the word to describe it. 

\---

Yurio glided onto the ice. The music had yet to start but already his presence demanded everyone’s attention. Green eyes sharp and his hair pulled back tight. 

His short had been about growing out the fears and doubts of his childhood. His free was about the man he was going to become.  

The moment the music started he tore through the ice. Immediately, he stunned with fluid footwork that spiraled into a series of spins. He couldn’t mask his emotions. There was so much anger. But it was a beautiful rage. It had been confined in his chest this whole time and now there was release. His motions fluctuated between soft and sharp. A perfect contrast that was quintessentially Yuri Plisetsky. 

Each motion one of power. A tale forming. Yurio becoming not quite a hero, but a man worthy of a love to defend. Not a sexual love. A love that was just that… love. He would never tell them but that in of itself made it all the more profound to him. He didn’t need to speak. He was becoming a man that could and would lay everything down for his beloveds. Each raise of his legs like a threat. Moving like he was a blade. No need for words. Just his skating.

_ You can’t hurt us. I won’t let you. Not anymore.  _

He skated backwards with his cross overs, arms slowly rising. 

_ I’m not weak. You’ve shown me this. _

He jumped. A powerful quadruple salchow. The crowd cheered. More spins and leaps. Each one so full of fury and yet, landing so tenderly. He wasn’t Katsuki Yuuri. He landed his jumps in the middle of his performance. But his emotions increased his stamina in that moment.  

He was tired of being unable to protect. It happened when that alpha attacked with a knife. It happened in the elevator. But not again. 

Blades scarred the ice.  

_ Watch me. I’ll become someone worthy of you.  _

 A lunge followed by more footwork. The intensity of his rapid movements silencing the crowd. 

_I’ll take advantage of everything I have. I’ll show you all. We’re untouchable._  

He sank into a hydroplane. His legs struggling to hold up his weight from all the vigorous leaps and spins he had done. The audience cheered. They witnessed a move rarely used in competitions. It made him look like he was defying gravity. 

Not missing a beat he rose up into a one last spin. He came to a halt as the music somberly faded out. His finishing pose a simple one, but carrying the message. His back strong and slightly arched. One arm reaching out above him, eyes gazing into the bright lights on the arena’s tall ceiling. 

He wasn’t a boy. Not anymore. He was a man in his own right. 

A soldier. 

\---

Chris and JJ went next. They were clearly shaken by Yurio’s performance and it showed. He stayed in the lead with a total of 298.48. Chris in second followed by JJ. 

And now it was time for Yuuri.  

He was terrified. Anxiety and doubt in every muscle. 

Victor saw it while the skater tried to tie his skates with stiff fingers. It wasn’t just Yuuri’s nerves. It was his body recovering from releasing so many pheromones. 

“Yuuri, let me,” he knelt before the skater. Again, he had pushed for Yuuri’s costume to be form fitting. This time there was no tantalizing plunge of the neck line but instead, snug mesh amidst arabesque designs down his shoulders, across his back and up one of his thighs. It might have been a bit provocative especially in the light of recent events. The skin peeking through, colored violet, made the alpha’s mouth water.  

“Victor… wait!” Yuuri didn’t want to muddle Victor’s image any further. “They’re taking photos!” 

“Let them, Yuuri. I’m not ashamed of how I feel for you. Nor should I be.” He steadied himself, wrapping his fingers around Yuuri’s strong calf. Yuuri leaned against the edge of the rink. 

Victor had hoped getting the chance to touch Yuuri the way he had last night would ease his cravings. But he was more famished for Yuuri’s touch than ever. His inner alpha more aware how sweet the omega could be. 

Victor’s fingers, the very same ones that had been inside Yuuri, tugged at the laces. 

“Too tight?” he asked.

“It’s just right…” Yuuri could never figure out how Victor knew the pressure for his skates. The omega never liked having anyone tie his skates. Too loose or too tight a fit could be catastrophic. But he liked having Victor do this even though he always protested. 

Satisfied with Yuuri’s skates, he used the railing behind Yuuri to stand up. The motion brought their bodies very close. Just another inch and they would be kissing. 

The clicks of shutters became rapid fire. 

“Victor…”

“Ah… As I thought. I want to kiss you…” he let out in a classical Victor whine.

“Eh?”

“Yuuri… please skate so I can kiss you soon.” 

And all of his worries faded away. The Russian’s antics always warmed his heart. So excessive and over the top. So very much Victor.  

He laughed. A laugh that from the bottom of his belly all the way to corners of his mouth. And Victor loved hearing it. Seeing it on the omega’s face. 

“It’s a very serious matter,” he teased. “I want to kiss my Yuuri.” 

“Even if I’m not gold?”

Victor pulled Yuuri in for an embrace. The smaller man was hesitant at first. He knew that everyone’s eyes were one them at this moment. 

“Yuuri, you’re more precious than all the gold in the world.” 

Tears welled at the edge of Yuuri’s eyes. He wasn’t sure if he was sad or incredibly happy. Perhaps a bit of both. 

They parted. It was time for Yuuri to go on the ice. 

“Keep your eyes on me.” 

“Yuuri, you should know by now that I can’t take my eyes off you.”  

One more smile. 

And then he glided onto the ice. 

The lights were on him. The music had yet to start but he could feel the weight of everyone’s gaze. Their expectations. Their prejudices. They were just as heavy as the way his body felt.  

Everything hurt. Each breath painful.  

But Victor was there, waiting for him.  

The music started. 

_ Watch me.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was that? I didn't want Yuuri and Victor's moment of intimacy to seem dubious. Yuuri has always wanted to be intimate with Victor. Just not because they've been forced into it. I put them into a situation where everything is too grey. I know that consent wouldn't be really possible under the influence of drugs. But these two love each other very much and they are working through all the hurt they've had to endure. I hope my intentions come across. And that the smut was more than just smut (not that there's anything wrong with writing that!). 
> 
> I added that bit about JJ because everyone was so pleasantly surprised that JJ acted the way he had. I genuinely love ALL the Yuri on Ice characters. I don't think they could intentionally be cruel to each other. And I think JJ really does admire Yuuri in the cannon after having experienced something so similar. 
> 
> So now we are left with Yuuri's free! Will he be able to skate? And if he makes it, we'll get to Victor's turn to perform in the next cup. 
> 
> Thanks for reading. I am absolutely floored by how wonderful you have all been. 
> 
> Until next week,
> 
> -Dazzledghosts


	12. The Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! 
> 
> And thanks again for all your kindness. 
> 
> In this chapter we have Yuuri's free performance followed by some drunken behavior.

The music started. A subtle few chords of piano. Yuuri stretched out one hand. It was so tender with fingers poised elegantly. He drew it back into his own chest and pushed off with his blade. He skated on one leg, swaying the other in mesmerizing footwork. His motions more than skating. It was a dance. Keeping his balance was hard when everything hurt, but Yuuri was always one to persevere.

He could feel everyone’s eyes on him. Like it was a pressure against his chest, suffocating him. The audience. The judges. The reporters. The skaters. What were they thinking? Were they seeing Yuuri the skater? Or were they blinded by Yuuri the omega?

He did a quick mohawk turn to move backwards using his momentum and his backwards crossovers to build speed. He did a leap, switching his legs midair and landing on the opposite foot, moving into a camel spin. His body looked long and strong, parallel to the ice. A single arm reaching above to the ceiling as if he was offering himself to whoever would take him.

Yuuri was afraid. Every fiber of his being had been stiffened to the point he was certain he would snap. But when he thought of Victor and everyone else that defended him, it seemed to ebb away. Yurio had been so brave for Yuuri. His voice quivered when he had tried to be bold. The ice was just as precious for the blond as it was for Yuuri. Offering it all away was by no means small. It made the omega’s heart swell. 

Yuuri gathered his body and sank into a sit spin. Moving fast. His arms raised up behind him, fingers interlaced, as though he were pushing himself even closer to the ice.  

But it still hurt. It hurt so much to move. But even more to think. He had been degraded in the news and online. Someone went as far as to assault him with heat inducers.  

Was it that vile to be an omega? Was it so wrong? Yuuri never got a say in what he was born as. He would have given everything to be a beta. His doubts bubbled in the back of his mind. 

But he still rose up, grabbing his leg into the most achingly beautiful Biellmann spin. His speed slowing down with the somber music. Everyone could see his arched back. His lean and shapely figure accentuated by the costume Victor had chosen for him.

There was a murmur in the audience. Yuuri couldn’t tell if it was one of approval or disgust. Regardless, he continued on. He skated like this was his last chance. It might as well be.  

A few more pumps of his blade and then a jump spin. For a moment, he doubted he would make the landing. The slightest tremble could send him plummeting. But his blade met the ice without mishap.

There was a light applause. Polite at best. Yuuri remembered just yesterday when the crowd cheered for him. He had been a storm and now he was just… an omega. He felt his vision blur with tears.

“Ganbatte!!” The pronunciation was all wrong but the sentiment clear. Victor was somewhere off the ice, cheering him on. It put a smile on Yuuri’s mouth.

It didn’t matter what the crowd thought of him. What the ISU decided to do with him.

He was skating for Victor. For Yurio. For _himself._

Yuuri pushed off the ice. It was nearing the end and Yuuri had concentrated most his jumps for this moment. A quad salchow landed without his second blade touching the ground.  

That got the crowd gasping.

Now a triple lutz.

He moved, fighting all the pain of last night’s pheromone surge. Of having almost fallen into a heat.

With each jump the crowd seemed to forget what Yuuri was, even if his own body wouldn’t.

Last jump. A quadruple flip.

Yuuri was weightless. Yuuri was breathtaking. Everyone who was watching could feel it.

He landed his jump. The rink erupted in screams and cheers.

Yuuri moved into an Ina Bauer, quickly becoming a signature move for the skater. He did it so effortlessly. His body seemed like willow. So flexible and arched but strong at the core.

No one knew Yuuri’s strength better than Victor. The alpha couldn’t keep his eyes off Yuuri even if he had wanted to. That arch in the brunette’s back reminded him painfully of how Yuuri looked under him last night.

Could everyone see that too? How world shatteringly beautiful Yuuri was? It didn’t matter to Victor what Yuuri was. Omega, alpha, or beta. He just wanted Yuuri.

The Yuuri who was soft. The Yuuri who was lost in skating, making the most achingly beautiful music with his body. The Yuuri that saw Victor for who and not what he was.

And right now Yuuri was moving into a spread eagle. It made Victor’s heart beat fast. How could Yuuri move so tenderly even when Victor knew how much those muscles must be flexing and straining? That raw power of Yuuri’s body made Victor’s knees weak. Yuuri was many things, but he wasn’t frail. He was strong.

A final series of spins. It looked like Yuuri was fighting with himself in that motion. His body tight into a ball, grabbing his blade in a low sit spin. The turmoil entrancing to watch. He released and rose up. Almost a blur. One last leap. One more sway of his slender limbs. A hand tenderly touching his face and then stretching itself away with his gaze following longingly. 

Victor wasn’t sure but it seemed like it was towards his direction. As if Yuuri was offering himself to the silver alpha. How he wanted to take that hand and plant kisses on it.

The crowd got off their seats.

Katsuki Yuuri was an omega that had just performed one of the most stunning frees. He was a defiance to all preconceived notions. Nothing about him was frail. They couldn’t deny it.

\--- 

They were howling his name. But Yuuri hurt so much. Even with his stamina, he was exhausted. His chest rising and falling violently with each breath. He had put every bit of himself into this skate and his body had yet to forgive his almost heat. Legs quivering, he moved towards Victor. All he wanted were those long arms around him.  

And Victor was there, waiting for him. Arms outstretched. Yuuri didn’t slow down or even try to stop. He skated right off the rink and into the alpha. Victor was almost knocked down by the force, but he wrapped himself tightly around Yuuri and held his ground.

“I did good, right? Did I show them that being an omega doesn’t mean I’m weak?”

“Oh, Yuuri! Yuuri you were beautiful! You stole my breath away!”

He pulled back and tucked back a strand of Yuuri’s hair that had fallen out of place from his vigorous skating. He didn’t care that Yuuri was flushed or covered in a thin layer of sweat. In fact, he found it alluring.

“Remember the kiss you promised me?” Victor teased.

“Victor!” Yuuri gasped out through a laugh. They pressed their foreheads together. A kiss would happen. Just not in front of the cameras. Not because they were ashamed but because their love wasn’t a spectacle for the clicking shutters. 

\--- 

They sat on the bench at Yuuri’s kiss and cry. Yakov was there too, his arms crossed looking stern as usual, but leaning in close to Yuuri.  

283.43.

Yuuri was in fourth.

The brunette didn’t hear the score, but he heard the uproar that followed it. He knew it wasn’t good.  

“What…? That’s preposterous!” Yakov’s usually stone cold composure fell apart. His face red and mouth a scowl.

“They… they can’t be serious…” Victor was stunned. Yuuri’s performance had been worthy enough of landing him second, if not first. He was furious. “There must be a mistake…”

But there was no mistake. The judges struggled to give Yuuri a low score. Finding faults in Yuuri’s performance was difficult. They couldn’t outright give him the lowest score of the skaters. It would have been too obvious. They settled on giving him an insult: _You have no place on the podium._

Victor snuck a glance at Yuuri, who had pulled out his glasses to stare at the screen. What he saw on the omega’s face was heartbreaking.

It wasn’t disappointment. It wasn’t anger. Just hollow acceptance.

Yuuri was expecting this. It showed in how his eyes seemed dull and how a sigh pushed past his lips. And it hurt Victor to see it and know that Yuuri anticipated this. How painful was it to skate and know he would crash against a wall of oppression only to go no further?

Yuuri looked down, refusing to meet either Russian’s gaze or look at the screen anymore.

“It’s higher than I thought it would be…” he muttered. There was a cynical smile on his mouth.

“Yuuri…” Victor wanted to comfort but found that all the words turned to ash in his mouth. What could he say to make this better?

“I’m sorry. I guess that was a disappointment… I’ll have to do better at NHK Trophy?” Yuuri tried to look hopeful but his face betrayed him.

“Yuuri…” Victor pulled Yuuri into a tight embrace. He wanted to become a safe haven for the omega. To shield him from everything.  How could Yuuri endure this all? Victor would have crumbled under the weight of it. It burned him up from the inside out and it wasn’t even his life. He could only watch as they continued to hurt Yuuri.

“I’m sorry, Victor…”

He didn’t want Yuuri to apologize. Not now, not ever. None of this was his fault. He had been nothing but breathtaking. Victor held tighter, hoping his emotions were conveyed through the pressure of their touch. 

\---

As soon as they left the kiss and cry, the reporters surrounded Yuuri. Victor stood beside him, like a calming wave. His presence always grounded Yuuri.

The alpha was uncomfortable with Yuuri being circled by so many people. He wasn’t sure he could recognize the person who had assaulted Yuuri. Another dose of inducers and Victor would surely fall into a rut after sensing Yuuri’s heat. Neither of their bodies could endure those pheromones again.  

He tried not to be overprotective but found himself glued to Yuuri. Victor had lost so many people to his clingy behavior. They called him needy. Told him that he wasn’t the alpha they had anticipated. Already he was worried that he had overstepped his bounds from the night before’s actions. But he just wanted to be close.

“Yuuri, what do you have to say?”

“Will you tell your fans why you lied to them?” 

“Are you upset about your low score? Doesn’t it seem the judges were intentionally unfair?” 

“How does it feel to go from first to fourth?”

“Is Victor your mate?" 

Victor prickled at that question. He noticed Yuuri turn tense. Victor absolutely wanted to be Yuuri’s mate. More than anything. And not because of the alpha that clawed inside him. It was because he was the happiest when beside Yuuri. Because he wanted to make Yuuri just as happy.

It angered him that they would ask such a thing when the two of them had never spoken about bonding. Victor wasn’t even sure if that was an option between the two of them. Yuuri hated being an omega and there was nothing more omega than bonding.

“Why did you lie about your secondary gender?”

Yuuri took a deep breath. There was no hiding from this. Not anymore.

“I never lied about being an omega.” He admitted it with his own mouth. Words he never thought he would say out loud where everyone could hear him. “I never spoke about my secondary gender because it had nothing to do with my skating. It doesn’t define me. I’ll continue to skate and show all of you that alpha, beta, or omega, it doesn’t matter. Thank you for understanding.”

“Are you hoping to pave the way for more omegas like yourself?”

The question stunned Yuuri. It wasn’t framed harshly and lacked malice. If anything, it had an air of hopefulness to it.  

“What can you say to other omegas out there looking up to you now?”

Yuuri never imagined himself as a role model. He couldn’t see himself as one. He was just Yuuri. How could someone look at him and want to aspire to be him? The idea made Yuuri want to laugh. A dime in a dozen figure skater that was an omega. Who wanted that? Yuuri certainly didn’t.

“I… I can only say that our secondary genders are not who we are. I hope that everyone else can see that. And if they can’t... then I’ll show them. Thank you.” And with that, Yuuri was done. The reporters tried to keep him there. But Yuuri moved past them with Victor following behind. He was an omega but he wasn’t small or frail. The look in his eye made them all part for him. Katsuki Yuuri was so much more than an omega. He was a storm.  

\--- 

“This is bullshit. I don’t want the medal. I don’t want to go on the podium.” Yurio yelled. “It has no meaning. I don’t want to win a rigged tournament.” Yuuri still pushed him onto the ice to grab his prize. The alpha grumbled the whole way, trying to resist. But Yuuri’s strength always surprised him.

Chris and JJ were on boths sides of Yurio. None of the skaters looked pleased to be on the podium. They had wanted this. But it didn’t seem genuine. The medals felt heavy around their necks and their smiles hollow. The ribbons strangling and the weight suffocating. Every gesture seemed empty and just a mockery of all they had worked hard for. It wasn’t just an insult to Yuuri, it was an insult to them all.

When Yurio got off the ice, he chucked his medal to the ground. He didn’t want it. It wasn’t his. But Yuuri picked it off the floor and carefully dusted it off. The omega’s expression one of affection. He placed it around the young Russian’s neck with a tender smile. And when Yurio’s lip quivered for a fraction of a moment, Yuuri brushed a strand of gold hair to the side of the alpha’s face.  

“Yura, you deserve this. You skated beautifully.”

“This should be yours…” he tried to recover from the use of the diminutive version of his name. No matter how many times it left Yuuri’s mouth, the sheer affection behind it made him pink.

“Don’t worry. I’ll be taking gold in the Prix.” Yuuri flashed him a smile. A comment like that would have riled the young alpha easily in the past. But as hard as Yuuri tried to be playful, his sentences quivered at the tail end. And it made Yurio ache.

\---

After the ceremony, Phichit dragged Yuuri away. He batted Victor and Yurio aside, saying something along the lines they of “You see Yuuri all the time” or “Stop hogging him to yourself! He’s my best friend!”  

So Victor spent his evening with Chris instead.

“Victor… how’s everything…?” the Swiss alpha leaned in. His tone was playful but his intentions clear. He wanted to know if Yuuri and Victor were alright. Something was off in Victor’s demeanor. Maybe he was pouting that Phichit took Yuuri away for the night but it seemed more than that.  

“I… I don’t know…” Victor took a sip from the wine he was drinking.

“Oh…?” he was careful not to pry too openly.

“It’s all jumbled up, Chris. This wasn’t how it was suppose to happen. Last night… Last night was…” he was at a loss for words. Nothing had felt as good as touching Yuuri. Victor knew pleasure well. But the way Yuuri’s insides encased his fingers made him insatiable. His alpha wanted to feel more. _He_ wanted more.  

Yuuri had been forgiving and comforting like he always was. He had tried to reassure Victor that he wanted to be touched that way. But Yuuri had been drugged against his will to the point of near heat. Surely now, with distance from that moment, he would be upset? Would Victor’s touch only remind Yuuri of that night?   

“Did you two…?” 

“No… no I just did the minimum to stop the heat.”

It was strange seeing Victor like this. The alpha always had whatever partner he wanted. None of the previous relationships, if they could be called even that, were serious. What he had with Yuuri was clearly precious to the alpha.

Victor had been scorned by past lovers. In the end, they all found him suffocating. Victor wanted to cling to Yuuri and shower him in affection. Chris didn’t even need Victor to tell him that. It was obvious in way he stood close to the omega. But he was restraining himself. Victor knew how understanding Yuuri was but the thought of losing Yuuri frightened him. How long could someone be understanding? 

“Ah… this is why I’m happy my partner’s an alpha,” Chris sighed. “To be honest… I sometimes thought Yuuri was an omega. That night at the banquet when we danced together, he was soft but also firm.” Chris was being a bit mean. He remembered how envious Victor had been that the two of them had pressed their near naked bodies against one another. He had whined and complained about it for months afterwards.

Victor had teased Chris plenty when it came to his own alpha mate. And now that the tables were turned, he was going to enjoy this to his heart’s content. A Victor so utterly in love was absolutely endearing to poke at.

\---

When Victor returned to their hotel room, Yuuri was already bundled up under the bed covers. He had wanted to arrive before Yuuri, hoping that they could talk. Victor wasn’t even sure about what. He felt childish but the need to be reassured that they were still Victor and Yuuri was urgent. Their heated touches from the night before left him uneasy with both desire and doubt.

The alpha carefully approached Yuuri’s sleeping form. Yuuri was still wearing his glasses, though they were askew now. Slow breaths escaped his parted lips making the sheets gently rise and fall.

Victor reached down to take Yuuri’s glasses off when he was grabbed by the tie around his neck and pulled down face first into soft surface of the bed.

“Biktoru…” Whenever Yuuri was drunk, his accent became thicker.

“Yuuri…” his voice muffled by the sheets as he rolled around onto his back. He tried to sit up but Yuuri crawled ontop of him, pinning him down. The weight of his body falling onto the alpha’s groin. 

“Ne, ne, Biktoru… I miss having your scent on me. Will you...?” Yuuri wasn’t usually demanding. But it delighted Victor when he was. However, the alpha was worried that with Yuuri’s intoxication events would unfold similarly to the night before.

“Yuuri, you’re drunk.”

“Please?” he smiled and patted Victor’s chest.

Scenting seemed innocent enough. And the cup was over. Victor promised Yakov not to scent for the duration of the event to hide Yuuri’s identity as an omega. The Rostelecom Cup was over and despite all his efforts in restraining himself, everyone knew what Yuuri was.  

“Alright…” he pulled the sheets away and gathered Yuuri in his arms. Yuuri settled into the embrace, resting his head on his alpha’s chest. Victor tentatively let his scent spread onto Yuuri. He was strangely shy about the act. It reminded him too much of how he touched Yuuri the night before. His bergamot slow but deep.

Yuuri melted into Victor.

The feeling of their bodies against each other brought back memories. He was painfully aware of Yuuri’s warmth. It made Victor want so much more. His fingers had only been inside. Any and all other touch had been avoided. But it was enough for Victor to learn how warm and tight Yuuri was.

He wanted to engulf Yuuri’s nipples in his mouth. To sink his fingers into the crook of Yuuri’s waist as he rubbed himself against the omega’s slick soaked entrance. Not pushing inside… not yet… He dreamed about savoring Yuuri. Dreamed of making Yuuri crumble with need. Wanted to see Yuuri twist and move with him inside the omega.

“I love Victor’s smell,” Yuuri said so contently, breaking the alpha’s spiraling daydream. He needed to avoid those thoughts. They seemed so much more real now that he had a taste of Yuuri’s touch.

“Oh…?” Victor knew the effect his scent had but hearing it confirmed always made his heart flutter. _Yuuri likes how_ I _smell._ It was a point of pride for him.

“But did you know…? I like how we smell together even better,” he propped his chin up on Victor’s chest. Glistening brown eyes grabbing hold of bright blue. A drunk Yuuri was always a bold Yuuri. Victor’s throat bobbed as he swallowed. The confession doing nothing to calm him down. What a delightful admission! His own pheromones spiked at the thought of their scents intertwining again.  

“You… you like it?” he asked, trying to distract himself.

“Mhmm…” Yuuri nodded. “And I want Victor to smell like me too…” Yuuri pulled himself up a bit higher, so now his face was hovering above Victor’s.

Alphas rarely let their omega scent them. It usually happened only in a heat. Victor never understood why. He had always wanted to feel like he belonged to someone. That he was a pair and not just an owner. Being an alpha was strangely lonely.

“Yuuri…” He wanted nothing more than have the scent of honeysuckle and cardamom on him, constantly mixing with his own. If he couldn’t be beside Yuuri all the time, he wanted a part of the omega with him.

“But… but only if you want that too…” the brunette started to shy away. He tried to sit up, but Victor held on tightly. He knew if Yuuri wanted to, he could push him away. But the lack of resistance implied the omega wanted to stay.

“Oh, Yuuri… nothing would make me happier! But… but you know what your scent does to me.” He brushed his fingers against the angry looking wound on Yuuri’s arm–the one he had given the omega in place of bonding his neck. Yuuri had offered himself in place of Victor injuring himself. Yuuri’s body momentarily tensed from the ache. “I don’t want to hurt you again.”

Yuuri pouted and his eyes narrowed.

“But I liked it when Victor bit me,” he dragged out his vowels. “Will you do it again?”

“Oh, god, Yuuri!” His restraint crumbling. Yuuri was too inviting and his alpha too accepting. 

_He’s offering. He’s asking! You cannot deny it._

“It didn’t feel good for Victor?” Yuuri’s face was stained in worry. “Was I the only one who felt good?” Yuuri burrowed his face into the crook of Victor’s neck. His own nape exposed to the alpha.  

 _He’s baring his neck. Your mouth is right there. Take it! Give me what is ours._  

“Of course it did!”

“You’re lying! I know Victor’s been with other people. There’s no way it would feel good with me…” 

Victor didn’t give Yuuri a chance to react. He pushed the omega to the side and pressed himself onto Yuuri. Their bodies overlapping perfectly and his weight sinking Yuuri into the mattress.

“Yuuri, nothing has ever felt as good as you. And nothing ever will. You’ve ruined me, Yuuri.”

“Ruined…?” the drunk omega’s eyes watered. He had read that word in the online articles. How he was the downfall of Victor Nikiforov. “I’m sorry! I didn’t want to ruin!” he hiccuped.

“No… no! I mean you’re the only one I’ve ever wanted, Yuuri. Yuuri, I love you so much. So much that I don’t know what I’m suppose to do!”

“I love Victor too… I love Victor the most!” The omega lifted his head and planted kisses across Victor’s face. Yuuri never failed to surprise. The act was so endearing and tender. Victor loved how those lips felt against his skin.

“Yuuri… how about I let you scent me when we’re back in our own apartment? How does that sound?” Anything to placate his omega.

“Promise?”

“Yes.”

“Kay!” He happily snaked his arms up Victor’s back and pushed the alpha down onto his smaller body. Yuuri and Victor were close in height with a difference of only three inches. But it was their builds that were different. When Victor was broad Yuuri was slim. The contrast in their bodies heightened when Yuuri pressed Victor onto himself.

“I’ll be patient!” It seemed like Yuuri was waiting for praise.

“That’s a my, Yuuri.” There was such pride in his voice. In this moment, Yuuri was his and only his.

The thought of Yuuri belonging to him made his pheromones spread out. And in response, Yuuri did something that stunned Victor. He dragged his tongue across Victor’s lips, pulling back with a satisfied smile on his face. A gesture that was nothing but erotic. The touch so warm that the alpha imagined other things with that tongue. Victor felt himself harden.  

“Yuuri…” he warned. Victor couldn’t resist more temptation.

“I promised you a kiss, didn’t I?” His voice so innocent, contrasting wildly with his actions.

“You’ll be the end of me, Yuuri. You’re too drunk…” Victor wanted nothing more than to kiss Yuuri. He loved the sensation of their mouths pressed against one another. What he loved even more was Yuuri’s expression afterwards. His face pink, eyes lidded with desire, lips parted and wet.

Yuuri grabbed Victor’s shirt and tugged.

“Yuuri… what are you doing?”  

“You can’t sleep in a suit…” he mumbled while looking focused.  

“Right… right… slow down.”

“Off!” a very drunk Yuuri stripped Victor of his jacket. There was no fighting an intoxicated Yuuri. Victor sat back while Yuuri struggled to undo the buttons of his shirt. “Arms up! Banzai!” The alpha listened to the commands as Yuuri carefully peeled away his clothes.

“Happy?” He couldn’t help but smile at Yuuri. The omega looked so pleased with himself. The brunette would absolutely be red in the face about his behavior tomorrow. That would be just as delightful as the bold Yuuri of right now. Victor loved all sides of Yuuri.

Yuuri pushed Victor down.

“These too!” he reached for Victor’s zipper.

“Yuuri!” before he could stop Yuuri his pants were thrown across the room. He was left in his boxers. Yuuri collected the alpha in his arms and hummed happily at his handy work. It was so close to a purr that Victor’s alpha wanted to respond in kind with a pleased growl. But he swallowed back the sound. They settled into one another and the bed.

Victor was incredibly aroused and in a state of extreme undress. But Yuuri was leaning into him so trustingly and his breaths becoming heavy.

The omega must have been exhausted. A pheromone surge takes days to recover from, and despite that the brunette had skated a vigorous program. Victor wanted Yuuri to rest just as much as he wanted to ravage him. But for the latter, he wanted Yuuri sober. As much as he was fond of Yuuri’s drunk antics he was afraid of himself. Last night had been a narrow escape of not bonding Yuuri. He wanted their next moment of intimacy, should there ever even be another one, to be completely lucid. No hint of dubious consent. He wanted Yuuri to want him.  

“愛してる.” Yuuri mumbled. 

“я люблю тебя.” 

He felt Yuuri’s lips arch into a smile against his chest.

\---

They returned to Saint Petersburg the next day. Yuuri found himself sandwiched between the two Russian alphas. Their bright eyes narrowing whenever someone approached them. At the slight sound of shutters clicking, they used their bodies to cover and hide. It was easier for Victor with his broad shoulders. Something that irked Yurio to no end. Especially when the silver alpha would offer him a smirk of superiority.  

So Yurio made up for his lack of size with effort.

Whenever Yuuri would pull out his phone, the young alpha started talking rapid fire. Asking questions, giving snide comments, doing everything to keep Yuuri from seeing anything written about himself. He saw how Yuuri’s face would fall with each new article. Every word attacking him. But it seemed that what Yuuri hated most weren’t the words about himself. They were the ones written in regards to Victor and Yurio.  

Amidst these lies and fabrications about the omega, there were hopeful things too. Articles writing Yuuri as a champion for his secondary gender.

“I never thought an omega could go so far!”

“How did we all think he was a beta? He’s so pretty.”

“Those judges gave him a low score on purpose!”

“I want to skate like Yuuri.”

“I wish I could have an alpha like Victor too.”  

“Did you see how he jumped on the ice! It doesn’t matter if he’s an omega!”

The weight of expectations were just as suffocating as the insults. And when people thought they were being kind, in the end, their words all reduced Yuuri down to one thing: an omega. Yes, he had gone far for his gender, but in the end that’s what they saw him as. Yuuri wanted to be more than that.

He wanted to be Yuuri.

\---

Makkachin barked happily when they arrived home. Georgi had taken good care of him but he wanted his two humans. He padded around them and nuzzled their legs as the pair took their shoes off.  

It had only been a few days but it felt like ages since they last stepped in their apartment. Already it was evening, and they both had practice tomorrow. Victor had Skate Canada coming up in less than a week and Yuuri was never one to stop.

The alpha was in his room, lazily unpacking. It seemed a waste in effort seeing how he would be on the road again soon.

A gentle knock at his door. He glanced up to see a nervous Yuuri. Victor could always tell when something was on Yuuri’s mind. Yuuri’s feet would be closer together. His fingers fidgeting against one another. And the most telling of all, Yuuri’s brows creased ever so slightly.

Victor motioned for Yuuri to come in.

“It’s nice to be home even if it’s for a little while. Ah, if only we could take Makkachin with us to Canada too…” Victor filled the silence. Most of it was nonsensical chatter. But after spending so much time with Yuuri, he learned that the omega found it comforting. It eased the pressure off of Yuuri.  

“But we’ll take him to Japan for NHK Trophy for sure. I’m looking forward to visiting Hasetsu afterwards and I’m sure Makkachin is too. Maybe we can…”

“Victor…”

Yuuri was finally ready to speak.

“Yes, Yuuri?”

“Do you remember the promise you gave me?”

Victor had given Yuuri many promises. Some of them grand, others small. And for the most part, Victor kept his word.

“Which promise?”

“The one you gave me last night…” Yuuri’s face was turning red fast and he refused to look Victor in the eye.

“Last night…?” Victor didn’t realize Yuuri remembered anything from the night before. When they woke up, Yuuri hadn’t mentioned a word of it.

“You said when we got back…”

“Hm?” Victor tried to remember what he had promised that made Yuuri so distraught.

“Victor… can I scent you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gosh, I don't think I'll ever be happy with this chapter. It was a rough one to write. I wanted to convey a lot of things but it all seems disconnected to me now that I look at it. 
> 
> A lot of you guessed that Yuuri's score would suffer from his secondary gender being revealed. But worry not. He's quickly becoming a fan favorite among the crowds. This won't keep him down. Not when he's got the support of Victor and Yurio. I wanted to show that Yuuri's strong not just physically, but emotionally. He's not going to let this keep him down. 
> 
> And I hope the drunken scene wasn't too long. This fic needed a moment of light heartedness. 
> 
> I had promised Victor's turn to perform this chapter but that wasn't in the cards. Hopefully next one! After some scenting and potentially more intimate moments. 
> 
> Thanks again for reading. And I'm terribly sorry if this chapter was a let down. I hope to deliver better in the next one!
> 
> -DazzledGhosts


	13. The Promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! And thank you for reading. You're all so generous with your kind comments and all the kudos you have given me 
> 
> I'm sorry this took two weeks instead of one. I tried to force a lot in this chapter at first but then rewrote it. I wanted to solidify the importance of consent in this chapter. Because nothing makes my heart flutter more than two people who really want one another. 
> 
> So we pick up where we left off: Victor had promised to let Yuuri scent him but never thought a drunk Yuuri would remember. And now the omega wants to do just that! This chapter is several pages of intense scenting, communication about consent, and perhaps a little bit of eros.

“Victor… can I scent you?”  

Victor remembered now. The promise he made, thinking Yuuri would never remember. 

“Yuuri…” 

“I… I have to go back on my suppressants. I won’t be able to...” Yuuri’s eyes were pointed firmly on the ground. 

And that made Victor ache. Of course Yuuri would have to take the suppressants again. He just wished it wasn’t so soon. Or ever. Omegas consumed poison to hide their nature. If Victor had his way, Yuuri would never swallow another pill again. Just one bite to Yuuri’s soft neck and all of that would be gone. But he wasn’t sure if it was reason that compelled him to think that or the part of him that was desperate for Yuuri.  

The Russian’s silence made Yuuri nervous. Had Yuuri imagined the promise? He was drunk at the time but Yuuri could distinctly remember the pressure of Victor’s body on him and the sharp scent of bergamot when the words were spoken. Even though he was drunk, he wanted it very much. Was the promise made just to get a drunk omega to settle down? Or did Victor regret the offer and feign ignorance? Neither seemed like something Victor would do. 

“I understand if you wouldn’t want to…” Yuuri knew his request was strange. Many alphas would prickle at the thought of being scented by an omega. Especially one as floral as Yuuri. But for the last time, Yuuri wanted their pheromones to blend into one. Ever since Victor had touched him–made him tremble with pleasure–Yuuri wanted to breathe it in again. To drown in the scent they would make as lovers. 

Victor’s quiet made Yuuri’s skin itch. “Actually forget I said…”

“Yuuri… come here.” Victor sat on his large bed and opened his arms. 

He was hesitant at first. But when Yuuri saw the smile on Victor’s heart shaped lips, he practically dove onto the bed. 

The alpha pulled Yuuri into an embrace. He had anticipated smelling Yuuri’s gentle cardamom and soft honeysuckle but there was nothingness instead. He peeked down the omega’s shirt to see the scent blocking patches resting on soft skin. Sensing Victor’s dismay, Yuuri pulled away. 

“I… I’ll need to take my patches off first,” he moved to go to the bathroom. His body stiff and awkward.

“Yuuri, let me.” Victor tugged at Yuuri’s shirt. “What was it you said last night? Banzai?” Yuuri’s face reddened at the memory. It was very similar to this moment only then it had been Yuuri stripping Victor of his clothes. Nervously, he raised his arms. Victor tore the shirt away effortlessly making Yuuri shiver from the air against his bare skin. 

The alpha raised his arm to Yuuri’s neck.

“It’s alright… I can…” 

“Yuuri, I want to…” Victor rarely cut Yuuri off. Only in moments of insecurity did he prevent the brunette from finishing his thoughts outloud. He knew Yuuri was self conscious of what had become of his skin. Victor softly grabbed Yuuri by the back of his neck. Soft black hair interlacing between long, pale fingers. He pulled Yuuri close so that the omega rested against his chest. 

It felt strange to have his own clothed chest meet with Yuuri’s bare one. It seemed wrong. Skin should touch skin. 

Victor pressed the pads of his fingertips against the patch furthest down Yuuri’s back. Yuuri made a sound between a whimper and a sob that tore at the alpha’s heart. 

Yuuri’s skin ached from the acidic patches. They burned away at flesh and in his efforts to suffocate his own scent, he had become overzealous. He used patches too much and too often, afraid of pulling Victor into a rut or having another alpha attack him. 

“Yuuri, it’s alright…” Victor let his own pheromones spill out and soothe as he slowly tugged at the patch. Violent purple sat under the white square. Yuuri shuddered and held his breath as Victor moved up. “Breathe for me, Yuuri.”  

“Haa!” escaped Yuuri’s mouth, trying to take a breath as another patch was tugged off. If Victor hadn’t known Yuuri was in pain, the sound would have been almost erotic. 

“That’s my, Yuuri. Deep breaths…” the alpha pressed a kiss against Yuuri’s forehead. Victor’s fingers already sensing the burn of the acid, making his skin feel paper thin. He thought about how Yuuri did this on his own every night. The omega painfully tore off his patches, bathed the raw flesh with suppressant soaps, applied scent blocking lotion, and then somehow endured the ache of placing more patches on tender skin. Perhaps the only good of using suppressants would be the end of the patches hurting Yuuri.  

Victor’s hands moved north, peeling slowly. As each one was cast aside, the scent of cardamom and honeysuckle became more potent. It filled Victor’s lungs and made his skin hot. But this was just the beginning.  

The last patch was thrown aside as Yuuri clung to the alpha with a steel grip. Yuuri panted into Victor’s neck, trying to breathe in his alpha’s scent in hopes the pain would fade away. He hated his patches almost as much as he hated suppressants. 

“Are you alright, Yuuri?” The omega sat up straight, trying to put on a brave face. But his expression betrayed him with a small quiver of his lips. “You don’t have to if it hurts…”

“No…  I want to. I’ve always wanted to…” 

“On top or below, then?” 

“Top…” 

Victor eased onto his back, patting his chest as an invitation to Yuuri. The omega crawled on top of Victor, shedding his glasses and resting into the frim body beneath him. 

“I’m not too heavy?” Yuuri worried. Victor almost laughed but swallowed it back. He knew Yuuri wouldn’t take well to that in the moment. The Russian far outweighed Yuuri and almost every night he crushed the omega with the act of scenting. In fact, Yuuri’s weight felt perfect against him. He wanted to feel Yuuri in every way possible. His weight, touch, taste… All of it. 

“Not at all…” 

Yuuri shifted his weight awkwardly regardless. Victor decided to ease Yuuri’s worries by wrapping his arms around the dip of the other’s waist. It made Yuuri sink deeper onto Victor. If it had been anyone else, Yuuri would have been alarmed. But Victor’s touch reassured him. 

Carefully, Yuuri tried to let his pheromones spill out of him. 

But it hurt. It hurt so much. 

Not because of the blotches left behind on his scent glands by acidic patches but because Yuuri had resisted being an omega for as long as he was aware he was one. The only times he had come remotely close to scenting was during his heats. When he clung to a pillow and weeped into it, messily thrusting fingers into himself. He had avoided anything remotely omega about himself, and now he was succumbing to his nature. Trying to reach out to it after resisting for seven years. 

He buried his face into Victor’s clothed chest. Hands made fists into bed sheets. Yuuri pushed and pushed, but it was only a trickle. Not nearly enough to mark an alpha like Victor, whose scent was strong and unwavering. 

Victor could feel Yuuri’s frustration. The brunette was tense, unlike how soft and pliant he was when Victor did the scenting. Yuuri whimpered until he began sobbing. The alpha’s chest becoming wet with tear. 

“Yuuri…” Victor grabbed Yuuri’s face and lifted it to look at. Round brown eyes wet with pain. Victor swiped a thumb on Yuuri’s cheek, wiping away tears. “This can wait if it hurts too much.”

“I won’t be able to… not for a long time…” he hiccuped. Yuuri wanted this. Needed it. For Victor to be his just this once. 

He hated the anguish on Yuuri’s face. So he did all he could think to do. He kissed Yuuri. His own pheromones pushing onto the omega. And the brunette melted instantly. Mouths rubbing against one another, swallowing moans and making slick sounds. 

Hands snaked to Yuuri’s neck, ghosting above sore glands. Victor momentarily dreamed of letting his teeth dip into them but instead rubbed circles into the skin. He swallowed Yuuri’s whimper into the kiss. Gentle at first, but then a bit more firm. His own pheromones coaxing Yuuri’s. 

Another hand trailed down Yuuri’s spine, pressing onto the omega’s lower back. The weight pushing their groins together and consequently, their growing arousals. 

And just like that, the gates that had been holding Yuuri back parted. His pheromones flooded out of him.  

It took every bit of Victor’s restraint to not throw Yuuri onto his back and have his way with the omega. He groaned as Yuuri’s scent touched his skin. He reciprocated with his own pheromones. 

Victor had wanted this for so long. To feel like Yuuri was his and he was Yuuri’s. The voice that belonged to his alpha whispered the impermanence of this, but Victor was too enthralled to listen. 

Yuuri broke the kiss, panting as his body remembered what being an omega outside of heat was. 

Victor was in absolute awe. Anyone could take a cursory glance at Yuuri in that moment and see a quivering, frail omega. But that’s not what Yuuri was. He was fighting so hard against everyone’s notions of what an omega was and should be. Fighting so hard against his own body. And now, for the first time, accepting his omeganess. This was a different kind of strength. One where he was willing to see himself for all that he was. And to Victor, Yuuri was nothing but beautiful. 

Their mouths were still close, gasping for the same air only to breathe in their shared scent. 

Like sweetened tea and early spring. 

“Yuuri… you smell so good…” the Russian moaned, too enraptured to be ashamed of his un-alpha like behavior. The praise made Yuuri treamble. 

It was the first time Victor smelled a willing Yuuri. Not a Yuuri forced into near heat. Nor a Yuuri wounded and frightened. The change in scent subtle but so profound to Victor. He wanted for Yuuri to always smell like this. It was so… so comfortable and right. 

Pheromones mixed and settled into skin. They smelled like mates. 

Victor shifted his weight under Yuuri, hoping to become more comfortable for the omega. But in doing so brushed his leg against Yuuri’s groin. The omega moaned and Victor became acutely aware that Yuuri was aroused. Victor stiffened, afraid of himself.  

Ever so slightly, he peeked down at Yuuri’s face.  

“I… I…” Yuuri stuttered. His cheeks stained red. What a welcoming expression. The alpha’s throat bobbed as he swallowed. 

The last time they had been intimate hadn’t been completely willing on Yuuri’s part. No matter how much Yuuri reassured Victor, the alpha felt like he had done something deeply wrong. Even if it was to prevent Yuuri from a heat and even if he had just used his fingers… Victor was frightened of his own desire. He had never wanted anything nearly this much. 

Yuuri moved and this time, Victor’s own erection rubbed against the other’s. The alpha shuddered out a groan. It was deep and needy. He hadn’t meant for the sound to escape. 

“Victor…” Yuuri whispered tenderly as he planted a soft kiss on the alpha’s jaw. 

Victor’s teeth ached. The glands in his mouth felt swollen. He wanted to claim. Wanted to fill Yuuri with himself. 

He grabbed Yuuri by the arms and pushed. The brunette didn’t fall off Victor’s body but was forced to sit up. This position didn’t improve their circumstances. If anything, Yuuri’s weight now pressed down onto Victor’s arousal. Yuuri could distinctly feel it with his body exactly how long and thick Victor was.  

“Yuuri… Yuuri I need to stop. I don’t want to do to you what I did last time…”  

“... Last time?”

“I… I practically forced myself onto you. You couldn’t say no Yuuri…”  

“Victor! You weren’t the one who poured heat inducers on me!” 

“But I was the one who took advantage…”

“Victor… I wanted you. I’ve always wanted you…” Yuuri was embarrassed now. He hid his mouth in his palm, looking firmly at Victor’s chest. “It… it felt good." 

Victor usually had plenty to say. Getting him to be quiet was difficult. But Yuuri somehow managed to stun the words out of him. Though the silence did nothing to reassure Yuuri.  

“Was I… was I the only one that felt… good?” As strong as Yuuri was, he could still be anxious. And Victor hated that he was the source of that anxiety.

“Yuuri, you’ve no idea how good it felt to finally touch you that way.” Yuuri cast him a look full of doubt. “Yuuri… Yuuri, look…” Victor bucked his hips upward, using his arousal to emphasize his point. Yuuri gasped at the sensation of his aroused alpha beneath him. “I’m a mess for you. Don’t ever doubt how much I want you.” 

“Then why… why do you doubt _me_? You can touch me like that again, Victor.” Yuuri took Victor’s hand in his own and pulled in up to his chest. “I want to be touched by the person I love.”  

Each time a confession of love left Yuuri’s mouth, Victor’s heart soared. He would never get use to it. That Yuuri loved  _ him _ .

“Yuuri, I’m afraid I’ll hurt you…” 

Yuuri’s expression turned sour.  

“Victor… try to resist me.” 

“...What?” 

Yuuri slid off him and lied onto the bed beside him. Victor mourned the loss of the omega’s body but that was just for a moment. Hands grabbed him by the shoulders. 

“Yuuri…?” 

“You can’t hurt me when I’m willing.” Those hands pulled Victor. And even if he had wanted to resist, he couldn’t. The alpha found himself pulled onto Yuuri as though he were a child. It was no small feat. Victor was by no means light. His body was made of muscle and for Yuuri to effortlessly move him was a testament to the omega’s raw strength. “If I didn’t want you… I’d resist, Victor. I’d punch you in the throat,” Yuuri added the last part with a playful kiss to Victor’s neck.  

And it was true. Yuuri had fended off an alpha wielding a knife before doing just that. Yuuri wasn’t weak despite what his slender form seemed to imply. He was a trained athlete. He was Victor’s equal.  

“You… you want me?” Victor use to be confident when he was much younger. He knew he was attractive. But years of loneliness and rejection had made his brave behavior just a facade. 

“More than anything in this world, Victor.”  

“I… I can touch you?” 

Yuuri couldn’t help but smile. Victor always seemed so sure of everything. But he found this side of Victor, the insecure side that no one else knew, to be endearing. “Yes. Please do.” 

Victor shuddered out a laugh full of relief. “I can touch you…” This time it wasn’t a question but a reaffirmation to himself. 

To drive the point home, Yuuri arched his back, pressing their bodies and most notably, their arousals, together. He was being daring. If Victor wouldn’t make the first move, he would. 

That was all the invitation Victor needed. He pushed his own clothed erection against Yuuri’s. He earned a sweet whimper from Yuuri. 

“Can I?” Victor asked, his hand on Yuuri’s waist. Yuuri nodded. He tugged on Yuuri’s pants until the omega’s length was released. It was a common misconception that male omegas were small. Yuuri was the size of any typical beta. It was Victor who was an anomaly. 

“Victor too…” Yuuri palmed the alpha’s clothed erection. He moaned at Yuuri’s touch. 

Victor obeyed and unzipped his pants. To say their differences in size was notable would be an understatement. Many thought it would be ideal to be Victor’s length and width. Even for an alpha, he was intimidating. And because of it, he struggled to keep his lovers. None of them could fully take him, let alone endure his knot. 

But Victor was aware that the two of them could not go there. Not tonight. To mate Yuuri would result in their nature and alpha and omega to take control. A heat and rut would ensue, trapping them in one another’s embrace for days. As ideal as that sounded to the alpha, being ensnared by Yuuri’s warmth, he knew he couldn’t stop himself from marking and impregnating. Victor knew his inner alpha all too well at this point. Knew how it craved and obsessed over Yuuri. He could not trust himself to be gentle if they went that far. 

Yuuri snapped Victor out of his thoughts by lifting himself. Their lengths touched and Victor was gone. He grabbed Yuuri by the hips, letting his fingers sink into the malleable flesh. Their arousals slid against one another, becoming wet with precome. Each movement electric. The alpha’s long fingers wrapped around the both of them, adding friction and pressure. Messily thrusting against one another, grunting and moaning. 

Victor felt the urge to clamp down onto Yuuri with his teeth. He clenched them tightly together, hoping it would go away. But Yuuri had learned to recognize this need in Victor. The alpha’s pheromones would spike with sheer desperation. It turned the scent of rain in Victor to something more akin to earth and autumn leaves. 

So Yuuri found another way to occupy Victor’s mouth. He grabbed the back of Victor’s neck and tugged. The alpha’s eyes went wide with confusion and admiration of Yuuri’s strength. Their lips met and Yuuri kissed away Victor’s blatant desire to mark. Victor made a sound between a moan and a purr into Yuuri’s mouth, unaware that he wasn’t being very alpha like. 

All he was aware of was the feeling of Yuuri against his arousal. The taste of Yuuri in his mouth. The gentle caress of Yuuri’s hand on his neck. The scent of Yuuri on his skin. All he could feel was Yuuri. All he could think of was Yuuri.

And Yuuri was just as enraptured with Victor. If not more so. His body had never felt this way. The last time Victor had touched him, it was fogged up by the impending heat haze. Now he was acutely aware of Victor’s grip on him and the way their bodies moved. He felt hollow inside. Slick building at his entrance. More than anything, he wanted Victor’s length inside him. Fully and completely sheathed in his body. Yuuri wanted to make Victor feel good. Just as good as he felt with Victor moving above him.

“Yuuri… you feel so good under me.” 

They were still thrusting and grinding. Now the sound of flesh and wetness accompanying the creak of the bed. Both very close. Victor could smell it on Yuuri. And that excited him. Yuuri was going to come for Victor. Not because of heat inducers. But because he wanted this. Wanted Victor. 

A sound broke from Yuuri’s chest. A purr. It was Yuuri’s own omega, finally coming to the surface. It wasn’t needy like Victor’s alpha. It was shy just like Yuuri himself. Victor’s alpha sensed it. It roared the life.

_ Our omega wants us. Give him to me. Take him. Fill him. Knot him. _

“Victor… Victor… I’m close…” 

And that’s all Victor could endure. “Yuuri!” he cried as he spilled his hot semen into his hand. A few spurts dropped onto Yuuri’s creamy stomach. Still thrusting against the omega until he was completely empty. Hearing Victor call out to him made Yuuri’s frame treamble. His own cum spilling. The room heavy with their scent. 

When they were both spent, Victor stood up. 

“Victor?” Yuuri was still basking in the afterglow of his orgasm. His skin dewy and his face flush. But the alpha didn’t answer and moved to the bathroom. 

Had Victor not liked it? Did he regret letting an omega scent him? Yuuri worried as he heard the sound of running water. Was Victor washing him away? But the Russian came back with a wet towel in his hands. 

Tenderly, the alpha wiped Yuuri’s chest and length of any spilled cum. He didn’t want Yuuri to shower. Not after finally smelling like they were mates. 

“I… I can do that…” Yuuri offered, feeling shy after all they had done.

“No, Yuuri. I want to.” They were quiet while Victor towled Yuuri off as though worshipping every bit of skin. A smile on Victor’s lips the whole time. 

\---

That night, they slept in Victor’s bed. Yuuri curled into Victor, his body sore from using pheromones intentionally for the first time since he had presented. He felt heavy but content. 

“I wish I could smell like this always…” Victor sighed happily, gripping his arms around Yuuri tight. Every time he moved and every breath he took, he smelled Yuuri’s honeysuckle and cardamom with his own bergamot and rain. 

“Me too…” Yuuri murmured sleepily. 

And for a moment, Victor wanted to say that it could be that way. Always. That Yuuri could be his mate and he could be Yuuri’s. But the words were trapped in his throat. What if Yuuri said no? Was he being greedy? How much more of Yuuri did he have the right to claim? 

And then there was Yurio who had confided in Victor with the story of his parents. How the two were bound but unwilling. What if Victor did that to Yuuri? They were in love… but there had been so many who had also been in love with Victor. He was doing his best to be the alpha he was born and raised to be. But he whimpered and pined for Yuuri in a way that was pathetic for an alpha. Yuuri didn’t protest his behavior. But Yuuri was so warm and accepting. What if Victor was taking advantage of that part of Yuuri? 

All these thoughts spiralling in his silver head. His heart pounding. He had never been so considerate of another person before. Yurio had been right… Victor use to only think of himself and the ice. But now there was the heart of another to contend with. A heart that was so precious to him that he couldn’t bear hurting it. 

“Victor…?” The alphas thoughts came to a halt at the sound of Yuuri’s voice. 

“Hm…?”  

“I love you…” 

And that was all he needed. 

\---

When they entered the rink, Yurio smelled it immediately. The scent that he encountered once before of Yuuri and Victor together. It wasn’t just Yuuri that smelled that way. But Victor too. Yurio felt his chest tighten. Without trying to pry, he kept peeking glances at Yuuri’s scent glands. The collar of his shirt was too high for Yurio to see any mark no matter how hard he strained to see. 

“If you’re worried, I didn’t mark him…” Victor sprung up while the young alpha was taking a break. Yurio jumped. Victor had enjoyed watching Yurio fret over Yuuri but the blond had endured enough. 

“I… I wasn’t!” 

“Really?” Victor swung his arm around Yurio’s neck, pulling in close. “Aren’t you a bit curious?” The scent of Yuuri was thick on Victor. It mingled with the alpha’s strong scent into something soothing. “Not jealous are you?” 

“No, gross!” he shoved Victor off and went onto the ice again.  

He wasn’t bothered by the scent. He was more curious at what it had meant. The two of them smelled good together. Smelled safe and welcoming to the point that Yurio wouldn’t have minded being around it. Victor’s scent made him feel nostalgic. Yuuri’s made him feel safe. And when they were together, it was as though the young alpha was being cradled like a child. 

Yurio had been forced to grow up at a young age. His mother was too fragile for him to be a child. So he turned himself hard and jaded beyond his years.  

“Yura!” Yuuri skated towards him. “Would you like to come over for dinner? I’ve bought the ingredients for katsudon!” The omega was next to him now. 

The scent of honeysuckle and bergamot sweet on his mouth. It made Yurio feel like he could pry himself into Yuuri’s arms and stay there. As if any childish whim would be granted to him if only he asked the omega. 

“S… sure…” he mumbled. He tried to sneak a glance at Yuuri, pretending his eyes were elsewhere. Nestled on Yuuri’s face was the most content smile. All because Yurio had agreed to spend time with them. He tried to ignore how happy that smile made him. 

\---

Yurio had tried to help Yuuri cook but failed miserably. He weeped when cutting the onions and later spilled panko all over the counter. Victor spent the whole time clinging to Yuuri from behind and laughing at the young alpha’s expense. 

While they ate, Yuuri suggested to Yurio they make katsudon piroshki next time. Victor whined that he had never eaten this type of piroshki and demanded Yurio teach them. It was all so strange to Yurio. Being wanted and welcomed so openly seemed foreign to him. These two wanted there to be a “next time” with Yurio. 

He knew that Victor and Yuuri were now entangled romantically. He thought they would want to be just Yuuri and Victor. It seemed normal to him for it to be that way. But consistently they sought Yurio out. Not out of pity but out of genuine want.

Yuuri was showing Victor photos of his old poodle now. The older alpha was cooing in admiration, his arms wrapped around the omega. Yurio closed his eyes and breathed in deep. The pair’s combined scent everywhere. 

Thought he never had one to call his own, he knew what this felt like.

It felt like home.

\---

Yuuri stood up and grabbed himself a glass of water. Yurio noticed Victor stiffen. His demeanor turned rigid immediately. The alpha’s bright eyes not once leaving Yuuri’s back. It made Yurio watch closer now. Yuuri’s frame suddenly so small. 

Yuuri pulled something out of his bag. It made a rattling sound. Yurio glanced at Victor. The large alpha’s eyes narrowed as plastic clattered on the kitchen counter. Green blue looked back to Yuuri. And it dawned on him what was happening as Yuuri raised something to his mouth and tilted his head back. 

Yuuri was taking suppressants. 

It made sense now. Why Victor smelled of Yuuri. It was the omega’s first and only time. At least for a long while. 

He wanted to snatch the pills out of Yuuri’s hands. Yurio remembered how helpless he was when Yuuri first showed signs of blood toxicity from the medication. The omega had crumpled from the vomiting and vertigo, his body slowly wearing away. If he had continued, his organs would have shut down one by one. The pills wouldn’t just subdue Yuuri’s omega nature. They would dull his senses with poison and slow his reflexes. 

Yuuri wouldn’t just have to contend with other skaters on the ice. He would have to fight his own body. 

Yurio understood the dismay on Victor’s face. 

He would never say it outloud. But Yuuri’s skating was perhaps the most beautiful sight to behold. It wasn’t technically perfect. But what it lacked in finesse it made up for with heart wrenching motion. When the brunette leaped, he demanded everyone’s attention. Each time as though he were a surreal being out of their reach. So full of longing. So full of desire. 

Yuuri came back to them. A shy smile on his lips. He was use to taking his pills in secrecy. 

They needed to be taken once in the morning and once at the night. Yuuri should have taken one when he woke up, but he wanted to fully savor how he smelled like he was Victor’s mate. The pills would dullen his sense of smell. 

To be honest, Yuuri didn’t want to take the pills. But his heat was fast approaching. Taking suppressants needed to be like clockwork. Everything planned out perfectly so that his heat would be less intense and out of the way. He wasn’t looking forward to locking himself in a room, prisoner to his body. 

Yuuri settled back onto the couch, taking deep breaths. He wanted to savor everything before the pills kicked in. Victor’s bergamot. Yurio’s hyacinths. Tears welled at the corner of his eyes as everything seemed to fade out. Colors becoming bland. Scents blurring together. Already his body becoming sluggish. 

Yuuri never remembered his suppressants being this quick. It was always hard to readjust to the medicine. It made him feel incomplete. But this… this was suffocating. It was much too fast. He couldn’t smell anything. It was difficult to keep his eyes open.

“Katsudon?” Yurio leaned in. Something was wrong. The omega seemed disoriented. 

No answer. 

“Yuuri?” Victor put an arm around the smaller frame. Brown eyes strained to stay open. 

Unresponsive. 

The omega fell limp against Victor. His breathing slow. 

The suppressants were suppose to subdue Yuuri’s scent, but it suddenly spiked. An overly sweet honeysuckle that was thick in the back of both alpha’s throats. It would have sent Victor into a rut but he was too frightened. His inner alpha was alarmed and did not care for mating. Their omega was at risk. 

“What… what just happened?” Yurio grabbed Yuuri and shook. “Hey… wake up!” The omega’s arm twitched in manner that distinctly reminded Yurio of his mother limp on the floor. 

Memories of a body turning lifeless resurfaced. Her blue eyes slipping away. Lips mouthing words he never managed to hear. A body turning cold. 

His breath hitched as he pushed his head against Yuuri’s chest. He should have been relieved to hear Yuuri’s heart but it was pounding far too violently. 

Victor would have shoved anyone else aside for touching Yuuri that way. Especially in such a state of immobility. But this was Yurio. 

“Yuuri… Yuuri, please look at me.” Victor gently caressed Yuuri’s face. Brown eyes momentarily opened behind glasses. “That’s my Yuuri. Stay with me. You’re doing good. You’re always so good... ” he was rambling. Trying to keep Yuuri conscious. 

Yuuri gave a weak smile at Victor’s praise. He mumbled something in Japanese. Words that Victor didn’t know. 

“Hey… piggy! Stop it! You’re scaring me!” 

“Yuuri… what’s wrong?”

His vision was blurring and his chest felt constricted but also strangely light. Both the alphas looked so worried. Yuuri wondered why. 

Victor’s face looming close. His eyes wide and mouth moving fast. Tears welling at the edge of his silver lashes. 

_ Victor has beautiful eyelashes _ , he thought before everything turned black. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised Victor skating but it didn't fit. I wanted Victor to instead be completely reassured that Yuuri wanted him and consents to being with him intimately. And also for us to see insecure!Victor and strong!Yuuri! I wanted Yurio to also be more content in the midst of Yuuri and Victor. So it wasn't a chapter with much action.
> 
> But I suppose the end has some kind of excitement? Just a hint for what's happening to Yuuri: suppressants and heat inducers don't mix very well. 
> 
> This fic has been a lot of fun to write, but recently it's become a bit difficult. I'm second guessing myself a lot. So I think the span between chapters will have to become two weeks instead of one. Hope this wasn't a disappointment! I'll see you guys in two weeks!


	14. The Doubt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kindness! We pick up where we left off in the last chapter, where Yuuri took his suppressants but had an adverse reaction.
> 
> In this chapter, we find out what happened to Yuuri! And the pair go to Canada for Victor's first performance! There's some nervousness, familial love, doubt, and plenty of affection.

Most of Yuuri was cold. His legs felt heavy and his chest ached. But his hands… his hands were so warm.

Brown eyes fluttered open, gazing up at unfamiliar white ceiling tiles and dull fluorescent lights. A distant beeping came from the corner.

A hospital room.

There was comforting bergamot to his left. Yuuri peeked to see a sleeping Victor propped uncomfortably in a chair. Yuuri felt a rush of relief. Whatever had happened, it would be ok. Victor–his Victor–was beside him. The alpha was in a fitful rest with his brows creased, neck craned to the right, and his mouth in a deep scowl. Yuuri looked down to see that their hands were entangled.

_Is that why it feels so warm?_

Curious as to why his other hand felt just as warm, Yuuri looked to his right to find Yurio. The blond was sitting in a chair but leaned most of himself onto Yuuri’s hospital bed. One hand gripping Yuuri’s tightly, the other curled protectively around the omega’s abdomen, and the back of his head butting against Yuuri’s side. It was as though the young alpha tried to be in as much contact with Yuuri from the odd angle.

The sight tugged at the corners of Yuuri’s mouth. Gentle hyacinths seeping out with every soft breath the boy made, fluttering a few strands of golden hair.

Bergamot. Hyacinths. Honeysuckle. Yuuri took a deep breath and sighed. It seemed fitting that they were all so floral.

But how were the scents so vibrant? Hadn’t Yuuri taken his suppressants? Weren’t they suppose to drown into bland nothingness? And why was his own honeysuckle so prominent?

Sensing Yuuri stirr, Victor’s alpha adamantly nudged him to awaken. Blue eyes parted to see Yuuri. A Yuuri that was awake and moving.

“Oh thank, God. Yuuri…” he whispered, not wanting to awaken Yurio. The brunette leaned his head to the side and gave Victor a smile.

“Hey…”

The alpha wanted to sob out of sheer relief. The Yuuri of a few hours ago was immobile and unresponsive.

“Hey yourself…” Victor squeezed Yuuri’s hand.

“What are we doing here?” Yuuri asked in a hush tone.

“You… you had a reaction to your suppressants.” Victor wasn’t quite sure how to explain it. This wasn’t going to be easy for Yuuri to hear.

“Oh…?” In the seven years since he presented, Yuuri never had an adverse reaction to his medication. Yes it poisoned him, but slowly as it was intended to.

“The doctor can explain it better… but suppressants and heat inducers don’t mix well.”

“But that was days ago…?” Yuuri never used heat inducers. He wasn’t familiar with them and it had been his intention to keep it that way. They were thrusted onto him without his consent. Originally, they were used by omegas that wanted to conceive. Obviously an omega wouldn’t use both. Suppressants rendered the omega womb useless.

Their voices woke up the sleeping alpha. He lifted his blond head and murmured something in Russian. When sleepy green eyes locked onto Yuuri, they sprung wide open.

“You! You’re awake! Are you… are you feeling ok?”

“Yes. Just a bit sore, but I’m ok. I’m sorry if I worried you.”

“You… you didn’t…” Yurio released the omega’s hand, feeling shy now that Yuuri was awake.

“Thank you for being here, Yura.” Yuuri reached out and ruffled Yurio’s hair. It felt silky between his fingers. The alpha would have shoved the hand away if it belonged to anyone else. Yuuri’s touch was comforting even if he refused to admit it.

There was a knock at the door and then it parted to reveal a nurse.

“I’m glad to see you’re awake Mr. Katsuki. I’m here to check your vitals, if that’s alright.” Yuuri nodded.

While they were taking his blood pressure, the doctor walked in. The very same one that had stitched Yuuri’s wound and berated him.

He placed his hand on the edge of the bed.

“From what I’ve gathered, you’ve mixed heat inducers and suppressants together. Chemically, the two are incompatible. It caused a dramatic drop in your blood pressure and could have permanently damaged your liver, kidneys, and your _womb_ .” The man seemed more upset at the latter. “But you were brought to the hospital in time. You’re lucky your _friends_ were there to help you, Mr. Katsuki.” The way he said friends was laced with a bit of malice.

The doctor seemed like he was restraining himself. There were words he swallowed under the intense gaze of both alphas. They were high strung and their collective pheromones prickled at the doctor’s skin challengingly. _Just try and insult Yuuri again. I dare you._

“We have you on IV to keep your blood pressure up and while you were unconscious we gave you several injections to counteract the reaction.”

“When can I take my suppressants again?” Yuuri didn’t skip a beat.

“Heat inducers take some time to leave the system, even if their influence is seemingly gone.”

“How long…?” Yuuri felt panic rise like hot bile in the back of his throat. “A week?” He sat up in the bed now, feeling restless. He could go a week more without them and still be able to fend off a complete heat.

The doctor couldn’t resist a laugh.

“A week? No, Mr. Katsuki. You won’t be able to take suppressants for well over a month.”

A chill of fear spilled across Yuuri’s chest.

“Is there an alternative?”

“Anything remotely similar to a suppressant will wind you back here, in a hospital.”

“I… I don’t think you understand. I _need_ to take those suppressants. I… I have a…” Yuuri’s face turned violently red. He never liked talking about this subject. It wounded his pride. “I have a heat coming up in less than a month.”

This was news to Victor. He wasn’t privy to Yuuri’s cycle. He knew that. But it still stung that Yuuri hadn’t told him.

“And by the looks of it, you’ll have to endure a full fledged one, Mr. Katsuki. Without the suppressants, not only will you experience it fully, but you will have a preheat as well.” Yuuri’s face blanched. “When was the last time you had a complete heat?”

“Six…” Yuuri murmured.

“Six months? Then you will be fine. Your body can handle it.”

“No… six years.”

The doctor froze. Whatever restraint and feigned respect he had, gone. “Mr. Katsuki, that’s extremely irresponsible even for an omega. Your pheromones will be far too potent during your heat. Have you ever stopped to think about the consequences of your actions? Omegas aren’t suppose to abuse suppressants. And to recklessly mix them with inducers? You’re being careless.”

Yuuri stopped understanding the doctor once he realized he would have a full heat. His mind reeling too fast to understand English.

“Mr. Nikiforov, you’re his alpha aren’t you? You should consider acting like real alpha and tightening your reins.” And with that, the man stormed out. Victor was too stunned to say anything. His lips parted but there were no words.

Tightening reins was the act of alphas controlling their omegas. It was using pheromones to bring pleasure or hurt for a desired behavior of docility. A alpha could punish his omega by exuding pheromones that would sting, an action reserved for protecting them, not hurting them. But with time it became a tool to coerce obedience. Victor found it barbaric.

And to imply that Yuuri needed changing was beyond appalling to him. He loved Yuuri just as he was. And that included his insecurities and shortcomings.

“Fuck that guy…” Yurio growled.

“Yuuri…” Victor didn’t care that he was just insulted as an alpha. Yuuri mattered more than his pride.

The omega’s lip quivered as he sank back into the bed. He pressed his palms into his face, fingers gripping his dark hair tightly.

“This… this is fine.” Yuuri gave a nervous laugh that said otherwise. “I… I can do this… I…”

Yuuri wasn’t fine. His chest heaved, fighting back tears. He had done everything right. He took his suppressants at the expense of his body. And when his body couldn’t endure it anymore, he used his patches to the point of pain. Yuuri had always been more than willing to swallow the pills and burn his glands if it meant he could just have something that resembled normalcy. He followed every rule obediently. And none of that mattered. Yuuri was going to have a complete heat. He had endured all for nothing. There was no escaping being an omega.

Victor grabbed Yuuri’s wrist and tugged. The omega resisted at first gave but in when Victor pleaded.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry I’m an omega. I’m sorry I keep making trouble…”

“Yuuri!” both the alphas interjected.

Yurio was less gentle than Victor. His hands grabbed Yuuri’s shoulder with too much enthusiasm, fingers digging into skin.

“Don’t apologize for that! So what if you’re an omega?! You’re Yuuri! You’re Katsudon… you’re… you’re…” _You’re my friend. And now you’re my family._

“I think what Yuratchka is trying to say is that you’ve done nothing wrong. If anything… you’ve been hurt so much. Yuuri, we’re here for you. You’re not alone. Whatever hardship you face, I want to face it with you. Beside you. I’m sure Yura feels the same.”

Yurio didn’t say anything but squeezed Yuuri’s hand reassuringly. And that meant more to the omega than any words the teen could offer. His green eyes looked wet as though he were fighting back tears. His mouth thinned into a line, full of determination.

“But…”

“No buts!” Yurio cut him off.

“Please let us stay beside you,” Victor added.

Yuuri couldn’t hold back his tears anymore.

“You… you want to…?” he choked out high pitched between his sobs. They had both seen Yuuri cry like this before. When he was drowning in his anxiety, thick tears dripped down his face.

“More than anything, Yuuri,” Victor said without hesitation.

“We wouldn’t be there otherwise,” Yurio muttered.

\---

They doctor prescribed Yuuri contraceptives. The exchange was stiff.

“Male omegas have a lower fertility rate. You cannot use suppressants but you can take these. They will in no way improve your heat. And I’m going to be honest. Your heat is going to be unbearable. But this will give you an ease of mind.”

Yuuri numbly thanked him. His anxiety would peak at just the mention of his heat to the point that everything seemed hazy to him. Like he was underwater and everyone else at the surface.

They ordered Yuuri a day of bed rest and to under no circumstances take suppressants. He left on shaky legs and arms full of holes from IVs and injections, but otherwise no worse for wear.

Yurio tried to go home to his apartment, but both Victor and Yuuri clung to him. It was too early in the morning and the teen had only a few hours of fitful sleep doubled over a hospital bed. But their concern went beyond that. They both saw how rattled the boy was. There was a fervent desperation that Victor saw in those green eyes as they widened over Yuuri’s unconscious body. And it was still there now, even though the omega was awake and fine. Like Yurio anticipated for Yuuri to violently vanish before his eyes.

Back in the apartment, Yuuri ushered the young alpha into his bed. He had been sharing with Victor so his own stayed empty. The blond resisted. He mumbled that he wasn’t tired. But he was no match for Yuuri. The omega’s strong hands guided him to the mattress. He hadn’t ever truly felt Yuuri’s strength. Only witnessed what it could do and from what he remembered it could be devastating. It should have unnerved him as an alpha. Instead he found comfort in the pressure Yuuri exerted.

_You’re strong. It’s safe here._

A few pats on the sheets, a gentle caress on the sleepy alpha’s face, one content sigh from the boy and he was fast asleep.

\---

“Yuri’s asleep…” Yuuri shyly entered Victor’s room. Up until now, the two of them had never genuinely planned to share a bed. They would just fall asleep into one another there.

“We should get some rest too. Practice is later in the day so Yakov won’t yell at me,” he sighed and shrugged off his jacket.

Yuuri stood stiff. He knew that was an invitation. But the last time they shared that surface, they were moaning and pressing against one another. The scent still clinging to the walls.

“Yuuri…” Victor was in front of him now.

The alpha wanted to ask so many questions.

_Why didn’t you tell me your heat was coming? Will you let me share it with you? When is it? Are you alright? How can I make it better? Will you let me be your mate?_

_That’s all I want, Yuuri. I want to be yours and for you to be mine… I want to be a good alpha for you…_

But he knew that as much as Yuuri was practical and level headed, his anxiety was not. It was corrosive and ate away at Yuuri to the point the omega was raw. The anxiety didn’t care for rationality. It thrived on insecurities and doubts.

So instead, Victor chose to leave those questions unanswered. Now wasn’t the time.

“How are you feeling?” Victor smoothly took Yuuri’s wrist into his hand and guided the omega to the bed.

“Oh… ano… sleepy and sore I suppose?” Yuuri’s Japanese mannerisms slipped out more readily when he was tired.

Victor sat onto the bed and pulled Yuuri into him.

“Is there anything I can do?” They both sank into the mattress. The warmth of the alpha’s body soothing Yuuri.

“No… this is more than enough,” Yuuri sighed as Victor’s arms tightened. Lips pressed against lips, moving softly. “This is all I need.”

\---

The following days blended together. Yuuri and Victor lost themselves in practice. Victor’s first competition loomed close and Yuuri was more determined than ever to skate on the ice. It was nearly taken from him over something as uncontrollable as his biology. They pushed themselves and everything else aside only to collapse into one another at night.

That is, until it was time to head for Canada. It was always assumed that Yuuri would join Victor on the journey. Yakov purchased them both tickets without even asking. Yurio on the other hand, sulked that he couldn’t go with them.

He feigned indifference only to be rewarded by Yuuri’s undivided attention. It eased his disappointment when he saw Victor pout from a distance. It was a consolation for not going with them.

He wanted to see Otabek. Talking through text was nothing in comparison to being face to face. There were so many things Yurio wanted to say. Words he couldn’t tell Victor or Yuuri.

But perhaps, more than anything, Yurio wanted to keep his eye on Yuuri.

Seeing the omega so limp stirred something inside Yurio. A memory that he drowned away years ago. And seeing Yuuri like that was all the more violent in comparison to how he remembered his mother. She had been distant while Yuuri had been nothing but warm. The young alpha remembered how much it hurt when she was gone. But just the mere thought of losing Yuuri made his eyes sting and his chest tighten. Yurio had found this bond all on his own. And he wanted to protect it on his own.

So he grabbed Victor by the collar and dragged him away the day before the pair left for Canada.

“Don’t let anything happen to him,” he growled. The alpha inside him riling to challenge Victor’s.

Victor’s gut reaction was to display dominance. But he knew that behind Yurio’s brashness was fear and concern. He ignored the offended alpha in his chest and instead offered warmth to the blond.

“I won’t let anything hurt him.”

Yurio tugged the alpha closer, forcing Victor down to the blond’s height.

“He’s been through enough… How much can one person endure…?!” Every time he imagined himself in Yuuri’s place, his mouth would run dry and selfishly the thought would pass through his mind: _I’m thankful I’m not an omega._ He would chide himself for thinking it. He hated the relief it brought him. He didn’t want to be his mother. He didn’t want to fall apart like that. But more than anything, he didn’t want Yuuri to break. Every turn, there was something new hurting Yuuri. Something new to suffocate the light out of him.

“Yura, it’s alright. Yuuri’s strong. He won’t… he won’t fall apart. And I won’t let anything touch him. Not this time. Not ever again.” Victor could see the young alpha’s mind reeling a mile a minute. The way those green eyes were wide with desperation and how he ground his teeth together. “Yuuri’s stronger than us both.”

“How…? How is he doing it? I’d… I’d…” _I’d crumble beneath the weight of it all._

The sound of ice scraping broke his train of thought. Both alphas lifted their bright gaze to the rink. Yuuri weightlessly leaped, one arm raised, into a quad salchow. His foot hit the ice and softly he glided, his body long and supple. One hand reaching out like an invitation to be taken. Every part of him strong. Every part welcoming.

“It’s alright, Yura. I hate that he’s hurting and wish that he never had to know any of it. If I could take it all away, I would do it no matter what the cost. As alphas, we will never understand. And that’s ok. That just means we have to be there for him when he needs it.” Blue eyes grabbing hold of green. “We’ll be his pillars and his net. How does that sound?”

“You think I can do that…?”

“I know it.”

\---

Before leaving for the airport, the three of them said goodbye. It was short on Yurio’s part. But Yuuri saw past it. He pulled the alpha in close. Flustered but willing, Yurio let himself be held.

“I’ll miss you, Yura. Good luck in Cup of China! I know you’ll skate beautifully!”

His smaller chest swelled with pride. He could feel how earnestly Yuuri believed in him. It made him feel beautiful even though he would have hated being called that by anyone else.

“I better see you in Japan…” he murmured and wrapped his arms around Yuuri, returning the gesture.

Victor watched in envy as the two Yuris shared a tender moment. In the past, he would have done anything to tear Yurio away from _his_ Yuuri. But now he felt left out. Sulking, he used his longer arms and wrapped them both in a suffocating embrace. The blond found himself pressed tightly against Yuuri, his face buried into the omega’s sweet smelling chest. The younger alpha howled while Yuuri laughed brightly.

\---

They slept through most of the plane ride. Yuuri knew Victor needed his rest, so he offered his shoulder to the alpha. Victor wasn’t one to refuse and pressed all his weight onto Yuuri. He never turned down an opportunity to feel Yuuri against himself.

And when Yuuri thought the alpha to be asleep, he gently brushed away silver strands of hair or pressed soft kisses onto Victor’s forehead. Victor’s stomach fluttered but still he feigned sleep. Yuuri was still shy with his affection. Shy, but completely and wholeheartedly earnest.

Victor had his doubts. He wanted to them to be mates. And moments like this made him all the more sure. He had never been so in love. Nor had he ever felt this loved in return.

But what if this was just for now? A bond was permanent and intimate beyond anything that either of them could understand. Victor had scorned too many past lovers. His childish neediness drove them all away. Just the thought of a life without Yuuri make his chest tighten.

He buried himself deeper into Yuuri’s body, hoping the omega would pass it off as restless sleep. To his delight, he received more tender kisses and soft whispers of love.

\---

Victor was swarmed by cameras and reporters the moment he entered Evraz Place. They cut him off from Yuuri. The alpha was alarmed but felt a bit of ease when Yuuri stayed beside Yakov. He gave Victor an encouraging wave from behind the sea of interviewers.

“Are you nervous for your return, Victor?”

“I’m excited to be on the ice again,” he gave his signature dazzling smile. But it failed to reach his eyes.  He watched from a distance as Otabek politely approached Yuuri and Yakov.

“Do you regret taking a year of leave from the ice?”

“Not one bit!”

He saw Yuuri’s face fluster as he dipped in a bow. Even now, his Japanese politeness slipped through. Victor found it so endearing. He wished he could be closer to see the blush on that face.

“What do you have in store for us today? Do you have a theme?”

Yuuri’s face flash from confusion to laughter at something Otabek said. His hand reaching the back of his head, a gesture that Yuuri never realized he made often.

“I don’t like spoiling surprises, you know that. But I’ll let you in on my theme! It’s about love and life.” He was struggling to feign interest.

Victor had always loved the spotlight. But for the first time, he didn’t want to be there. He wanted to be next to Yuuri. To hear the sound of the brunette’s laugh and know what caused it.

“Is Yuuri Katsuki your omega?”

The question snapped Victor’s attention back to the reporters.

“... What?”

“Are you two bonded?”

“Why would you chose a male omega?”

“Is he carrying your child? Aren’t their fertility rates low?”

“Did he take you from the ice?”

Was this how Yuuri felt? Scrutinized for everything? Every bit of his personal life on the table for questioning?

“As much as I’d love to brag about my personal life, I’m here to skate.” He pushed past them and headed towards Yakov and Yuuri, where the reporters weren’t permitted.

Victor wanted to answer those questions. He wanted to to say “Yes, Yuuri is my mate. Just as I am his.” But that would be a lie. He wasn’t even sure if Yuuri would ever want a mate let alone Victor.

“Victor!” Yuuri turned to smile at him. All his doubts vanished and Victor felt his lips stretch into a grin. A earnest one that made the edges of his eyes crinkle. Yuuri could easily pull a smile out of him. “I was just telling Otabek how much Yura wished he could be here too!”

The boy gave Victor a polite nod. His face as expressionless as ever. Victor was never sure what to do with Otabek. The beta seemed stern and restrained at first glance. But Victor knew better after seeing him and Yurio interact.

“What a delight to skate on the same ice as Otabek! Yuratchka will be very jealous.” Victor said as he draped an arm around Yuuri, pulling him close. Victor wasn’t someone to get nervous before a performance. And yet, there was something eating away at him. He didn’t like how the reporters asked such intimate questions. And he most certainly didn’t like how close Otabek was standing to Yuuri. He hated how childish the alpha inside him was.

\---

Victor was second to last to perform. The closer his turn came, the more his chest tightened. Yakov stood nearby, unsure how to proceed. Victor had snapped at him for the first time in years. As long as he had been Victor’s coach, the beta never saw him on edge. Victor exuded confidence. From the way he spoke to the way he stood tall. But right now, his breath was fast and his brows furrowed.

He waited. His costume hiding under his red and white jacket and his teeth gnawing at the edge of his lip.

“Victor…?”

“Hm…?” Yuuri was beside him, wearing a suit that Victor had bought. It fit his frame perfectly and accentuated the brunette’s waist and long legs.

“I’ve never been good at giving pep-talks. But I wanted to say how happy I am I get to see you skate on the ice again.” Yuuri gave him a lopsided grin. Victor resisted leaning down and pushing his mouth onto the omega’s. “I’ve always loved watching you skate. And I always will no matter what.” Yuuri was right. He wasn’t good at pep-talks. But he knew exactly what Victor needed to hear most.

“Will you kiss my gold at the end?”

Yuuri laughed and nudged Victor playfully. Victor was certain that was a yes.

Otabek’s performance was ending. And as much as Victor wanted to watch, he couldn’t. His mind was somewhere else and his gaze kept falling on his hands.

The beta left the ice and headed to his kiss and cry. The audience cheered loudly. It was jarring to Victor’s ears, blurring out in the end with the thudding of his heart beat. His pulse was maddeningly loud.

_What am I so afraid of?_

Warm arms wrapped around him and Victor found his face in crook of Yuuri’s neck. There was the faint scent of honeysuckle. Victor instantly knew what Yuuri had done for him. He had removed his patches for this one moment, risking his own safety all to let Victor indulge before going on the ice. And it was doing exactly what Yuuri had planned. It soothed Victor. He found his arms gripping onto the omega. He needed this. He needed Yuuri. His Yuuri who was soft and strong.

Victor never felt so pampered and cared for before.

Lips grazing the side of his face as Yuuri whispered to him “愛してる. I’ll be waiting for you off the ice, Vitya.”

The final blow was dealt with the use of his diminutive name for the first time ever. Victor felt like nothing could stop him. He was indestructible. They pulled apart, Victor’s face uncharacteristically bright red. His heart thrumming with excitement.

“Oh, Yuuri! When I get off the ice, I’m going to kiss you. Kiss you over and over again!”

“I’m looking forward to it.”

Victor tore off his guards and stepped onto the ice. One more glance at the omega. Yuuri was standing tall with Victor’s jacket draped over his arm. He could feel Yuuri’s intense gaze on him. How warm it made him feel.

The music began to play

_Watch me Yuuri. Fall in love with me all over again._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say that all the comments I've been getting for the last chapter were so so kind. Thank you guys for being so supportive! This chapter was hard to write. But I'm excited for where the next one will lead! 
> 
> I wanted to show Victor and Yurio being Yuuri's net. That they can care for someone whose circumstances they will never understand. Be it someone oppressed or with anxiety. And later in the chapter, I tried to show that Victor, as seemingly confidents as he is, has doubts and can also be nervous. But Yuuri is up to the challenge. I was very excited to have Yuuri say Vitya's diminutive! I hope it was exciting for you guys too!
> 
> Next chapter Victor performs. And he'll come to a grand realization. From there, it'll be the NHK Trophy, where Victor and Yuuri get to compete with one another! Yurio will skate in the China Cup, hoping to meet everyone at the Grand Prix in Nagoya, Japan. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter. It wasn't too eventful in terms of drama. I wanted to focus on emotions and relationships. 
> 
> Thank you so so much! 
> 
> See you in two weeks!


	15. The Decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and thank you all for your kindness. This chapter took longer than I thought it would. I've been so dissatisfied with it but it's tolerable enough to share now. Thanks for reading! 
> 
> This chapter, Victor does his performances at Skate Canada. The reporters and commentators try to tear at Yuuri and Victor's relationship. And Victor comes to make a massive decision.

Victor stood at the center of the rink, his back strong, knees bent softly and feet in T-position. His posture implied ease and comfort but there was a strength in those legs, waiting to push off and devastate the ice.

A somber violin and cello spilled through the arena. His raised his right hand to his mouth, giving his golden ring a kiss. Eyes shut, imagining it to be Yuuri’s lips and not metal warmed by his own skin. Softly, as if mourning, he let that hand reach out, fingertips poised achingly. The motion was directed towards Yuuri, who he could see waiting at the edge of rink. Despite the bright lights casting Yuuri into relative darkness, the alpha saw Yuuri raise his own hand to his lips. To his own matching ring. The gesture was returned and Victor felt his heart solidify with resolve. His heart beat like Yuuri was kissing him before everyone.

 _Watch me, Yuuri. Fall in love with me all over again_.

The music took off and Victor pushed with his back blade. The crowd already awed. Living legend, Victor Nikiforov returned to the ice.

He moved with a controlled fervor, building speed, but more importantly, building suspense. His long legs powered the motion. Palms upward, hands to his side. Raising them up only to push them back away, as if thrusting everything that surrounded him to leave behind one thing.

Victor changed direction effortlessly, but intentionally. It made him seem ethereal and unbound by gravity. His choreography always geared to stun.

Arms swaying, as if chasing desperately after something. Trying to grab at the hem of someone’s shirt. The alpha’s expression and the somber music implied what it was he sought through this dance: his lover. Not just any lover. His warm and ever so soft Katsuki Yuuri.

To drive anyone’s doubts away, Victor moved into an Ina Bauer. With his age and body, it was hard to do, but he did it as though he were Yuuri. It was the omega’s signature move, after all. The audience gasped. It was a homage. Even the commentators noted it, speculating the meaning behind it.

The music’s tempo increased with a desperation in the chords of the cello. A few backstrokes and Victor leaped. For a moment, it was as if the world turned silent. The alpha spinning in air, unbound by gravity. Silver hair flowing, legs long.

_Can you see me, Yuuri?_

His blade cut the ice as he landed perfectly. Arms reaching out before him, imagining Yuuri on the ice with him. The audience howled.

It was strange. Skating didn’t feel like it use to. It seemed less hollow now. Now that he knew Yuuri was waiting for him.

He moved into spins. Cheers erupting as he sank into a sit spin.

What was Yuuri thinking right now?

Victor use to skate for the audience’s gasps. For their admiration and the exhilaration. But right now, his mind was on just one thing.

_Can you feel how much I love you?_

A triple axel.

_This heart beats for you._

He moved his arms as if embracing a lover. As if holding the most precious gift in the world.

_Can you feel how much I wish you were on the ice beside me? How much I want to have you near me? How I want to be yours and for you to be mine?_

Victor wasn’t Katsuki Yuuri. He couldn’t stave off all his jumps for the end. But that didn’t make his jumps any less awe inspiring. What Victor lacked in stamina, he made up in perfect execution and utter eroticism.

He imagined Yuuri in his hands. Soft and pliant but also firm and strong.

_I want to be one with you, Yuuri. Can you see it? Can you feel it?_

The alpha in his chest hummed with the crescendoing piano. It had felt Yuuri’s omega once and now it tried to sing to it. To win Yuuri’s heart and instincts.

Another spin. More leaps.

Spread eagle. Arms tense with desire. _I want you in my arms. I want all of you. Every part of you._ The audience could feel it. Violin chords reminded them all of sweet kisses stolen in secrecy as Victor’s fingers trace his face, imagining Yuuri’s soft touch.

He slows as the cello and violin become achingly sweet and soft. Blades scraping as he comes to a graceful halt, hand back to him mouth, kissing his ring, the other poised at his hip.

They’re howling for him.

But for the first time, Victor doesn’t care for the accolades. He doesn’t want his glorified lap around the rink. Nor does he care for the gifts thrown on the ice.

He turns to see him. His sweet Yuuri, whose hands are on his mouth and eyes are filled with tears.

_So this is what it’s like to skate for someone?_

It felt warm. For the first time in so long, the ice didn’t leave him empty. Victor knew what he wanted. And the crowd wasn’t it.

He skated as fast as he could. Yuuri stood, arms open wide. Maybe Victor should have left the ice with more caution, but he didn’t care. He wanted Yuuri in his arms. His body slammed into the omega, anticipating the both of them to fall. His hand bracing the back of the brunette’s head. But they didn’t collapse. Yuuri was strong and sturdy as ever, smelling of cardamom and honeysuckle.

What happened next, he could never have anticipated. Yuuri’s arms wrapped around his abdomen in a tight embrace and Victor felt his blades leave the ground. His soft omega had just lifted him.

Cameras flashed as Yuuri give Victor a spin. A grin plastered on the alpha’s mouth till the point his face ached. He couldn’t help but laugh.

“You were beautiful, Victor! I can’t stop myself from crying! I’m so happy I got to see you on the ice again!” The sweetest of laughter despite tears trickling down those warm brown eyes.

Yuuri gingerly lowered Victor. Blades resting onto the ground again. But arms not parting from the embrace. If anything, Victor pulled Yuuri in tighter.

Victor’s chest swelled with pride.

“It was all for you, Yuuri. Did you see my Ina Bauer? I wish I could bend like you. I imagined you beside me.” Brown eyes widened. Tears still spilling. “I thought of you the whole time. And the kisses I’m going to steal from you.”

Yuuri had only ever dreamed to be on the same ice as Victor. To compete against him. He never thought that the man who shaped his entire career would shape a performance for him.

\---

Victor sat between Yuuri and Yakov on the bench. They were tallying up his score. He found himself ringing his hands together. He couldn’t quite place it. Something gnawing at his chest and it wasn’t his alpha. No, that beast was oddly satiated having Yuuri so close and unguarded with his scent. It wasn’t the score they would give him either. Victor was confident in his performance. He knew it was a good one.

114.12. Victor snatched first place as his own. But there was no relief.

He was about to turn to Yuuri when he remembered: Yuuri’s performance at Rostelecom Cup had been as beautiful as the one he just gave. But the judge’s denied him the score he deserved. They made sure he wouldn’t step foot on the podium, even if it was by the narrowest margin. All for the biology of his body. Because he was an omega.

And here Victor was, an alpha, ranking in first place. There wasn’t a question or a dispute. No one to stand in his way.

What was Yuuri thinking? Did he feel the gaping disparity between an alpha and an omega? A thing that was founded in nothing more than arbitrary prejudice. What would Victor see in those brown eyes? Would it be resignation? Resentment?

Victor had lost people to the competitive nature of this career. And back then it had been based in the discrepancy in skill between himself and his lovers. But not with Yuuri. No, this was something beyond Yuuri’s control. He was undeniably Victor’s equal on the ice and even excelled in stamina. How could Yuuri not hate him? Or at least resent him? If anyone had a reason to hold a grudge, it was Yuuri.

Nervously, he peeked at Yuuri, anticipating heartbreak.

But that’s not what he saw. Yuuri turned to him. Brown eyes sparkling from the smile on his lips.

“Victor! You’re in first! I knew you would be!” A voice so utterly proud. So full of affection. There was no doubt in Victor’s mind that Yuuri was happy for him. Not even a trace of resentment or envy.

And Victor knew. Knew that this person was the only one he wanted and would ever need. He wanted no one but Yuuri for his mate.

_I’m going to ask you to be my mate, Yuuri._

And he would. He needed find the right words and the right time, but he was going to do it. At the risk of losing Yuuri, he was going to offer himself to the omega.

_My life has never been so full before. Yuuri, I want you to feel the same._

Hands grabbed Yuuri’s soft face. The omega was still grinning, but there was confusion in his eyes. Victor leaned in close

“Yuuri… я люблю тебя.” The omega felt the breath of those words against his lips. Blue eyes looked at him, lidded with adoration. Yuuri’s frame quivered. There was so much desire in the alpha’s eyes.

“Victor…?”

“You promised me kisses.” He wouldn’t bridge the gap. Not unless Yuuri wanted it. They were in front of cameras and countless eyes. Touching those lips would be a declaration that they were romantically entangled with one another. Everything regarding their relationship had been speculation to outsiders.

Yuuri’s blush reached to his ears.

“If… if Victor wants to… I would be happy to give them.” A little bit of insecurity seeped through, but Victor knew it to be a yes.

_Yes. Yes, you can kiss me and let them all know: Victor Nikiforov is more mine than he is anyone else’s._

Neither of them realized who moved first, but lips brushed against lips. The click and snap of cameras went wild but it fell deaf to their ears. All Victor could hear was his heartbeat and the soft wet sounds their mouths made together. How could Yuuri be so warm and soft?

Yakov rolled his eyes and sat there, but couldn’t brush off the blush on his face. His two students were embarrassingly in love.

\---

“Excuse me!”

Victor and Yuuri were heading to leave the arena. A girl about the age of ten stood in front of them, nervously. Her arms were full of a large bouquet of flowers. Peonies and anemones spilling out.

“Hello,” Victor was used to being stopped after performances.

The girl rummaged through the bouquet and tore out a single peony and offered it to Victor.

“Oh… thank you.”

And then she walked past him, straight to Yuuri.

“I want to give this to you.” She raised the comically large offering of flowers.

“M… me?” It didn’t make sense to him. He wasn’t the one that performed. In fact, Yuuri had nothing to do with Skate Canada. He was there for Victor.

“I’ve always loved your skating!” she shouted at him. And then she tucked her face behind the flowers. “And then… and then I learned I was an omega.” Yuuri’s breath hitched in his throat. Female omegas presented early, but this was tragically young.

He bent down for their eyes to be parallel. He didn’t want her to look up at him as she spoke. He wanted them to be on equal ground. “I thought omega’s couldn’t skate. But then… then I learned you were an omega too! That my favorite skater was like me!” She thrust the flowers into his chest. Small hands quivering. “I… I still want to skate.”

Yuuri knew how hard it was to present. And how much it hurt that the ice could be taken away from you. Even now, Yuuri was struggling to stay on the ice. Just to show everyone that he could be their equal.

His performance would reflect on all omegas. Yuuri’s rise or fall would set in stone the role of omegas in the figure skating world for several generations. The weight of that pressed against his chest as he looked into the girl’s wide brown eyes.

Yuuri took the flowers from her. His hand resting on hers for a moment.

“Thank you. Thank you so much. You can skate. If I can, you can. What we are doesn’t mean an end. I’ll make sure of that. I promise.”

Tears welled on her thick lashes.

“You… you mean it?”

“Yes.”

\---

Victor walked out of the shower, a towel around his waist and another draped across his neck. Lazily, he dried his hair until his eyes landed onto a Yuuri sprawled across the beds. It seemed that while he was bathing, Yuuri pushed the two beds together.

It was such a comforting sight to behold. Yuuri, unguarded, lying on his stomach, chin propped on top of a pillow, and swiping through his phone. Victor could see the dip of Yuuri’s back from under his oversized clothes. He would never understand how Yuuri could be erotic in the most mundane of clothes. The alpha imagined how easily his hands could slip inside the fabric. He could even shove his head there with ease. Put his mouth on Yuuri’s chest, sink his teeth…

But his thoughts were running wild. He took a deep breath and forcibly hushed the riled up alpha inside him.

The bed sank under Victor’s weight as he joined Yuuri.

“Why the worried face?”

“Oh! It’s nothing. Phichit’s just been teasing me ever since…” Yuuri rolled onto his back to look at Victor. His eyes locking onto the nearly naked man. Pale skin taut over well defined muscles. Drops of water clinging and rolling down the planes of Victor’s body. Drops he wouldn’t mind licking away. The omega’s throat bobbed as he swallowed.

Oh how Victor loved when he inspired desire in Yuuri.

“Since…?” Victor planted a hand next to Yuuri’s face, his body leaning over the omega. Water dripping from damp silver hair onto Yuuri’s cheek. Victor resisted raking his tongue over Yuuri’s soft face.

The phone chimed and Yuuri grabbed it. Anything to stop himself from gaping at Victor’s flesh.

“Phichit!” he gasped. Face going red.

Victor didn’t like that another man made Yuuri’s face flush. Not when they were alone and especially not when Yuuri described the other as handsome in the past.

“What does our friend have to say now?” He teased and grabbed the phone. One tug and it was out of Yuuri’s hand. On the small screen was a photograph of Victor and Yuuri. Their mouths pressed against one another from their tender moment in front of thousands of viewers and reporters. Yuuri lay under Victor mortified as the alpha scrolled through the messages.

It seemed that Phichit was sending Yuuri every photo of the moment he could find. Multiple angles. Before, during, and after. Peppered between the images were comments like “Congrats on finally scoring your dream man,” or “Please get married already,” and “I’m sharing this on my instagram and you can’t stop me.” He wasn’t expecting that. Perhaps he didn’t need to feel envy for Phichit.

“Dream man…?” Victor teased. “Yuuri, who is your dream man?” He draped himself onto Yuuri.

“Victor! You’re wet!” Yuuri gasped, feeling his clothes soak up the water clinging to the alpha’s body. There was something that seemed feral about Victor, naked save for the towel around his hips. Like he could just devour Yuuri. And Yuuri didn’t think he could resist. Or rather… didn’t want to resist.

“Yuuri, I’m wounded... Who's this man I’ve never heard of?” feigning hurt. Hands grabbing Yuuri’s sides to tickle.

“Victor! Stop!” He managed to say between laughs.

“Yuuri, are you going to leave me for him?” he whined, hands slipping up Yuuri’s shirt. The pads of his fingers sinking into the dip of Yuuri’s waist. He wanted to worship that curve and press open mouthed kisses onto it.

“Victor! No more!” Hands grabbed Victor’s shoulders and legs wrapped around his waist. Yuuri swung himself and tossed Victor to the side, only to sit on top of him. “If you just keep that up, I might just leave you for him. He’s the most handsome figure skater and ridiculous man I’ve ever met.”

As an alpha, Victor should have been bothered by how easily he was manhandled. But even the beast in his chest murmured in appreciation of their omega’s strength.

“The most handsome?” Victor loved hearing Yuuri call him that. “He sounds amazing, Yuuri. I must meet him.”

Victor’s reply was a tender kiss on the lips. It was shy, just like Yuuri. Victor wanted more.

“Yuuri…”

“Hm?”

“Can you… Will you scent me again?”

Yuuri’s brown eyes widened. Victor was an alpha. And a perfect image of one. All while Yuuri was just a male omega. Rare but deemed the lowest of all the genders. No other alpha would want to be scented. Especially not by someone like Yuuri. Victor was kind to let Yuuri scent him once. But this was different. This would be in public and on the rink where he was going to perform. Hundreds of people would be able to smell him. Reporters and onlookers alike.

But Yuuri wanted it more than anything. For them all to know Victor was his.

“Victor… are you… are you sure?”

“There’s no reason to hide that you and I are together. Not after today.” Victor traced Yuuri’s lips with his thumb, momentarily considering pushing inside that hot mouth. The desire intensified when they parted ever slightly. Almost inviting him.

“But… I’m an omeg…”

“You’re my Yuuri. And I want a part of you on the ice with me.” Victor hastily cut Yuuri off. He didn’t want Yuuri to finish that thought. “But only if you want to,” he added with caution.

Victor was accustomed to scandal and gossip. But Yuuri was new to this. Ever since they outed him as an omega, there was a constant barrage against him. And today dealt another blow to his image. Victor took a peek at the online articles and comments and he was certain Yuuri had too. Some were ecstatic that Victor and Yuuri were together. Others blamed Yuuri for taking Victor away. The words used to describe Yuuri were vile. And Victor hated it. Hated that anyone could see Yuuri and not see what Victor saw.  

He wondered if he was being unfair to Yuuri. Asking the omega to kiss him before an audience and now to scent.

“I want to. I… I love how we smell together.”

And that enthralled Victor.

“How fortunate. I do too…” He put his palm onto Yuuri’s back and pushed down. The omega’s clothed chest brushing against his damp and bare one. Yuuri rested his head on Victor’s broad chest. The thudding of the alpha’s heart was soothing.

Since Victor’s free skate, Yuuri hadn’t applied his patches. They were always surrounded by onlookers, so he strained himself to suppress it. But it meant that he was spared tearing off the painful squares from his skin. He hated what had become of his back. All mottled and sore.

_How can Victor stand to look at it?_

Yuuri wasn’t sure how he scented last time. He remembered pushing and pushing only to feel pain from his glands. Something triggered his pheromones to come rushing out. He hoped that would be the case this time too.

“Are you sure…?” Even though it was Victor who asked, Yuuri was the one nervous.

“I’m absolutely sure. When you scented me, it felt like I was in your arms the whole time. I want that again, Yuuri. I want that on the ice. And I want you to smell like me. Like us.” _So no one will dream of taking you._ He hated how childish both him and the alpha in his chest had become. The memory of Otabek standing close to Yuuri sent him a fire.

Yuuri’s eyes planted firmly on Victor’s bare chest. He couldn’t look the alpha in the face. It was a confession just as profound as an “I love you.”

“Top or below?” Yuuri asked.

“I like both. But for this time, I think top.” Victor didn’t trust himself with Yuuri beneath him.

Yuuri nodded and readjusted himself, being delicate not to move Victor’s towel from his waist. Their bodies overlapped. They were almost the same height, and yet Yuuri’s body always seemed so much smaller. It had a roundness that Victor’s angular shape contrasted with. Yuuri’s torso getting lost in Victor’s broad chest.

He squeezed his brown eyes shut and tried to force his scent out. But he was met with resistance. His body was unforgiving and his own omega sulking deep where Yuuri shoved it away. Yuuri tried again, almost pleading with it. Tears welling through his closed eyes.

“Yuuri… Yuuri, here…” Victor’s hands slipped up Yuuri’s shirt and the omega gasped. Victor was still warm from the shower. Soft and yet surprisingly swift. Yuuri’s shirt was dragged up ever so slightly. Their stomachs pressed against one another. The curvature of Victor’s abs rubbing into Yuuri’s bare skin. “It’ll help if I do this.” Victor’s hands kneaded Yuuri’s back, where his glands trailed up his spin and spread across his shoulders and neck. The touch was firm. Fingers sinking into skin.

Victor let his own pheromones spill out. He knew Yuuri responded well to his scent. A bit on knowledge that never failed to surprise him. Yuuri liked his floral scent even though he was an alpha. His bergamot and rain sank into Yuuri’s skin and the omega’s shoulders softened. The tension that Victor felt under his hands as he touched, easing.

There was so much of it. Yuuri carried his stress both in his thoughts and on his body. The knots he felt under his palms worried him. Was it just the patches? Or was Yuuri always on edge? Always afraid of being seen as an omega?

Yuuri hisses as he pushed at his pheromones again, but to no avail. It hurt. Not just his body but his pride. Victor had asked _him_. And he couldn’t do it.

The alpha in Victor’s chest was impatient. It tried to reach out as if it had hands. It wanted Yuuri and the omega that he was.

_You’re mine. I’m yours._

“I’m sorry… I… I…”

Victor’s mouth hushed him with soft, repeated kisses. Hoping to swallow away all of Yuuri’s insecurities. Fingers still moving. Exploring the surface of Yuuri’s back. Imagining his tongue sliding across Yuuri’s prominent shoulder blades.

“Don’t force it, Yuuri. Sink into me. Can you feel mine reaching out to you?” Victor spoke about his alpha. He never liked addressing it out loud. It made that part of himself seem even more surreal. “It’s always impatient…” Victor gave an embarrassed chuckle.

Yuuri focused on Victor’s pulse under him. On the citrus and floral notes resting under the refreshing rain. On Victor’s hands as the ghosted down the dip of his spine.

Under all of it, Yuuri found him. Victor’s alpha.

Yuuri could somehow feel it paw at him desperately. It had the strength and wrath to be vicious if it wanted to. Yuuri remembered how Victor’s hands almost squeezed the life out of the alpha that attacked him. And yet it was being gentle, trying to coax Yuuri to itself.

_Be mine. Be mine. Be mine._

Within the cavern of Yuuri’s chest, a shy and nervous omega answered just once and quietly.

_Yours._

Like a broken dam, Yuuri’s scent came out pouring. Victor gave a gratified growl. Not just at the scent but at the ever timid response Yuuri had given his alpha. There were no spoken words but he felt it. It sent him ablaze. Yuuri’s omega reciprocated! Fingers gripping deep into Yuuri’s back, moving down. His mouth parted, wanting to suck and bite and consume. Tongue dragging across Yuuri’s chin, dipping dangerously close to Yuuri’s neck.

 _He responded!_ His alpha was strangely excited. Like a child. _Give him to me. Why are you holding us back? Why can’t he be ours? You agreed to give him to me. Give him to me NOW_.

Ever since the kiss and cry, Victor’s alpha whined. They were both in agreement. Yuuri should be their mate.

Victor tried to stifle his increasing arousal. But Yuuri’s stomach pressed against it and the omega’s flesh was so pliant under his hands.

Hands that were moving south, touching Yuuri’s round bottom. He wanted more.

_More. More. More._

A kiss planted on that soft throat. Yuuri moaned as Victor rubbed with his hands. He knew where Yuuri’s warmth was. Fingers tracing over fabric to…

Yuuri’s phone rang, startling them both. _Welcome to the Madness_ played loudly. Disoriented, Yuuri stretched over Victor and answered it.

Yurio’s face appeared on the screen. Yuuri hastily slid off Victor, trying to calm his breathing. Victor pawed at Yuuri’s legs mournfully.

“Yura!” he said breathily.

“Hey! Did you see what’s happening online?”

“Eh?” Victor sat up. His shirtless figure appearing beside Yuuri on the screen. He was upset but also relieved. There was a buzzing sensation in the back of his mind and his heart thrummed loudly. He was being careless. A few more minutes and he’d have begged Yuuri to let him inside that warmth. A warmth he had been dreaming of for so long.

“What… what were you two doing?!”

“Hm…? Oh! Ah! Nothing, nothing!” Yuuri’s face turned deep red, implying the complete opposite. Yurio eyed them suspiciously.“Uh… I think I know what you’re talking about. Is it… does it have to do with the kiss and cry?”

“What…? No. Also, I can’t believe you two did that. And right next to Yakov?” He gave them an grimace, even though he wasn’t actually bothered by it. “I mean the video!”

“What video?” Victor rested his chin on Yuuri’s shoulder. He was pouting that Yurio interrupted them.

“They found some security footage from the rink. When Yuuri throat punched that alpha.” Yurio sounded excited.

“Oh… oh that can’t be good.” Yuuri sighed.

“What? It was cool! He was huge and you still made him fall on his ass!”

Yuuri gave a nervous laugh.

“I wasn’t trying to hurt him… Now everyone will think I’m violent too,” Yuuri bemoaned. Another label to be added to his growing list of them.

_Omega, ugly, whore, third rate, liar, cheat._

“No way! Everyone is loving it! And now they know he was lying to the reporters about… you know…” About tempting and stringing along several alphas, only to pit them against each other. The man who attacked Yuuri claimed that Victor throat punched him. But the video showed Yuuri defending against a large alpha that wielded a knife. It shifted the narrative.

“I doubt everyone will see it that way…”

“I wish people were talking about that instead of victuuri.” Yurio rolled his eyes.

“Oh… what’s that?” Victor wrapped his arms around Yuuri’s abdomen, settling in closer but careful not to rub his arousal against Yuuri. He would have to tend to that on his own. But later.

“You haven’t seen it? It’s trending. It’s your name and Yuuri’s put together. Like… you know…”

Victor grinned.

“I think I like that sound of that. Victuuri…” he let it roll off his lips. “It’s like Victory! Yuuri, did you hear that?” He nuzzled Yuuri’s face with his own.

“Gross, Victor! Stop!” Yurio faked gagging noises. “Leave Yuuri alone!” The two started talking rapid fire in Russian. Yurio was harsh while Victor was playful. It put the omega into a sense of ease. Even though his image as a skater was crumbling, in that moment nothing could hurt him. The two alphas were in an innocent shouting match, lined with nothing but affection. The room smelled of their perfume. And Victor’s warm arms were around him. His chest pressing into Yuuri’s back. All that was missing was Yurio’s presence and Makkachin curled on their lap.

“I’m surprised you could still skate. I didn’t think you would score at all,” Yurio lied. “I bet you’ll fall on your ass tomorrow.”

“Not a chance. Not when Yuuri’s watching me.” Victor brimming with confidence.

“You skated beautifully, Victor. I can’t wait to watch you tomorrow.” Yuuri lifted a hand and patted Victor’s face, leaning into the alpha. Immediately the two were in their own world. “I couldn’t take my eyes off you.”

“Oh, Yuuri… The whole time I thought of you.”

The young alpha shouted while Victor peppered Yuuri’s cheek in soft kisses.

\---

The reporters were more adamant now. They swarmed Victor and tried to grab onto Yuuri. The alpha felt his chest simmer when he saw a hand grip Yuuri. But Yuuri shrugged it off. Gently, not to be read as rude. Victor could tell Yuuri was being careful. The release of the video stirred more insecurities in him.

_I’m not a wild omega._

Why did they give Victor a respectful distance but feel they were allowed to touch Yuuri? Victor found it maddening.

Yuuri scurried to Yakov’s side, knowing he would be out of sight with the beta. As much as Victor wanted to be close to Yuuri, he was thankful for the distance between the omega and the reporters.

“Victor, why do you and Yuuri Katsuki smell the same?” a reporter standing close sniffed.

“Is that… is that what Mr. Katsuki smells like?” another leaned in. Victor noted from the woman’s scent, she was an alpha. “Oh… it’s so floral… and what’s that other scent?” Her eyes shut, breathing in deep. He let his own pheromones pulse in irritation. She backed away.

“Are you two mates? Why doesn’t his neck have a bond?”

“What do you think of the video where he hurt another alpha? Are you worried he’ll do that here?”

“What are you two hiding?”

“Shouldn’t you tighten your reins on your omega?”

Victor felt his patience snap.

“I would never do that to anyone, let alone someone I care for. Yuuri is my… my partner. My equal.” Victor didn’t know what word to use when describing Yuuri. Lover? Boyfriend? Partner? They all fell short of what he wanted.

 _Mate_.

“An omega and alpha cannot be equals,” the female alpha noted. Somehow, there was no malice in her voice. She genuinely believed her words as though they were truth.

“I don’t believe that. And I think Yuuri has proven it. An omega is no different from an alpha or beta. We’re all the same. Both on and off the ice. Surely you’ve seen it?”

They didn’t look convinced. Even with the video of Yuuri overpowering an armed alpha. Or the stunning performances on the ice. After lifting Victor off his feet when the alpha was raw, heavy, muscle. How couldn’t they see it? Or did they choose not to?

Why couldn’t they see Yuuri the way Victor did? Strong, kind, anxious, beautiful.

It all made Victor’s chest ache.

\---

He was agitated. The reporters continued to ask questions about Yuuri as though Victor owned him. In their eyes, Victor and Yuuri weren’t on the same level. It made Victor feel like an elastic band stretched to the point it couldn’t return to its original shape. How could Yuuri endure this, day in and day out?

He wanted to go to Yuuri’s side, but the reporters were adamant. They built a wall with their bodies, separating the alpha and omega. And the alpha in Victor’s chest was insistent on being near Yuuri. After the reaffirmation Yuuri’s omega gave, the softest return of affection, it longed ever more profoundly. Victor didn’t even think he could want for something so much.

Some of the reporters even slithered to Yuuri and proceeded to badger him with questions. Victor wasn’t sure how Yuuri kept smiling. His answers were polite but you could hear his voice quiver.

A quiver that came from fear.

_If I say something wrong, will it reflect on Victor? Will I make omegas look bad? What am I supposed to do?_

It almost choked Yuuri to silence. What words should leave his mouth that they couldn’t contort against him? Against Victor?

\---

“What kind of alpha chooses a male omega?”

“He let that omega scent him?!”

“Doesn’t he seem bland for Victor?”

“That omega’s smell is sweet. If I was Victor, I would tighten my reins to keep him in line.”

“Victor must be playing with this omega, right? He hasn’t bonded him.”

“Who knew Victor Nikiforov was such a pushover alpha? To think I wanted to be an alpha like him…”

“They’ll end soon. Maybe when it’s over, I’ll pick up the pieces? Broken omegas are so easy and docile.”

\---

Yuuri somehow managed to push past all the reporters right before Victor’s free performance. He didn’t know how, but he sensed the Russian’s agitation from across the rink. The alpha’s face seemed jovial but his voice was flat.

They didn’t have much time.

“Yuuri,” he almost whined. Victor was exhausted. Tired of avoiding questions he didn’t have the answer to. Tired of defending his actions and choices when clearly he wasn’t doing anything wrong. Loving Yuuri wasn’t a crime. It was something beautiful and they tried to contort it. Victor hated it. Hated that anyone could look at Yuuri and see anything but someone strong and loving.

Hands grabbed the omega, pulling him close. The click of shutters grew furious, but Yuuri didn’t push him away. If anything, he pressed himself closer against Victor’s body.

“You’re going to be beautiful, Victor. You always steal my breath away… No…” Yuuri looked up into the alpha’s bright eyes. He saw an emotion he couldn’t name in the way Victor’s brows creased. “No… you _are_ my breath,” he corrected himself. “愛してる.” Yuuri took Victor’s hand into his own. “愛してる.” He pressed his lips onto the golden ring. “愛してる.” He whispered as he pulled away. “I will always love Victor.”

“Yuuri…” Victor wanted to sob and he wasn’t sure why. It would have been humiliating as an alpha, but he didn’t care. Yuuri was all that mattered.

How could anyone see Yuuri and not feel the same? How could they not hear him and think of how strong and beautiful he was?

“Yuuri, я люблю тебя.” Foreheads touched and Victor wanted a kiss. But there wasn’t time.

“I’ll be right here, Victor.”

_I’ll kiss your gold._

Victor stepped onto the ice.

\---

Victor’s heart sat heavy in his chest.

Perhaps it was his wounded pride. Not in himself. Not for the way they jabbed at his choices. But in the pride he felt for Yuuri. The Yuuri that was once his student. The Yuuri that made music with his body. The Yuuri that sparked life into Victor.

 _This is_ my _mate._

Or rather… Victor and his alpha hoped that would be the case soon.

The music poured into the rink. Victor pushed off, but instantly he noticed his stride to be weak. Not enough to be noticeable by someone watching, but enough to worry the skater. Did the reporters rattle him that much? Was his agitation finally getting the better of him? Victor wanted to shout and boast his affections for Yuuri, but even he was smart enough to know not to do that. It would only feed them and paint Yuuri as a fragile omega.

Building speed, he jumped into a leap. For a moment he doubted he would land it. He legs held a slight quiver. But as he spun in the air, he caught the scent of cardamom and honeysuckle mixed with his own bergamot and rain. It enveloped him and for a moment he was in his sweet omega’s embrace.

_Yuuri._

His blade kissed the ice and he skated strong, gliding on one leg, long and elegant.

Victor’s mind was flooded by Yuuri. His smile. The way his eyes widened with anxiety. Those soft hands that could lift Victor up. That body sliding against Victor’s perfectly.

Victor imagined Yuuri in his arms as he moved. How warm he was. How good he smelled.

A spread eagle. His arms open but then tightening around himself. Imagining Yuuri in his embrace. He could almost feel it. A pliant and wanting Yuuri. A Yuuri that sank into him.

There was no such thing as fate. But if there was, Yuuri was made for him.

He made the ice feel warm.

He made Victor feel alive.

\---

298.55.

Victor won gold. None of them surprised. Otabek came second.

Victor smiled on the podium when they gave him the medal. Not because of the prize. For once, that held little meaning. But because the way Yuuri looked at him so warmly. Like Victor had given him the world by returning to the ice.

In the past, Victor would have done a victory lap. He would have spun around, holding his medal and bouquet high for the flashing cameras with a charming smile on his mouth. But he skated off the ice once the pleasantries were over.

Yuuri waiting for him. Yuuri who was warm. Yuuri who accepted him.

Victor glided into Yuuri’s awaiting arms.

Wordlessly, Yuuri tucked a strand of silver hair out of Victor’s hair to look fondly into blue eyes. The touch left the alpha’s skin buzzing.

He wanted more of Yuuri. And so did the beast inside him.

“Congratulations, Vitya.”

His heart soared. When Yuuri said his diminutive, it made him want to cover the omega in kisses.

The omega gently pulled back, much to Victor’s dismay. The medal dangled around the alpha’s pale neck and between their bodies. Ever so gingerly and nervously, Yuuri lifted the medal. It was simpler than most. The body of it was clear save for the engravings. The clasp at the top gleamed gold. Yuuri pressed his lips against it, giving the kiss that Victor longed for not on his lips but to his medal. He didn’t know that he could be envious of an inanimate thing.

It was a shy act. But a loving one. Victor wondered how Yuuri could stand to do it when he so clearly deserved a gold of his own but was denied it.

But the glitter in Yuuri’s eyes showed that nothing of the sort was in his mind. All he saw was Victor.

And couldn’t contain it anymore. He wanted Yuuri. Wanted to be bound to this person for the rest of his life.

_Give him to me. Give him to us. If not that, than give us to him. NOW._

In all the excitement around him and the accolades, his alpha’s voice and his own were melding into one. Victor couldn’t distinguish between himself and it.

_Yuuri. Yuuri. Yuuri._

He knew he couldn’t sink his teeth into Yuuri’s neck. Not so close to a heat. Yuuri would fall into heat taking Victor into a rut. As tempting as it was, he couldn’t do that to Yuuri. Not until NHK Trophy ended.

But that didn’t mean Yuuri couldn’t bite him.

So he leaned in and spoke against Yuuri’s ear.

“Yuuri… Will you bond me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter seems choppy to me. And perhaps repetitive. And LONG. I just wanted to show that Victor hasn't had the support he's needed on the ice aside from Yakov. That skating had become meaningless until Yuuri sparked life in him again. 
> 
> I also wanted to show that Victor isn't one to give up when reporters and speculators try to tear away at himself and Yuuri. And this is perhaps less focused on this chapter: Yuuri isn't backing down either. He's terrified for sure, but Victor's worth enduring all those crude comments for. 
> 
> And then there's the final proposition. Victor is afraid of rejection. But he's even more afraid of not being Yuuri's or Yuuri being his. Especially after seeing how Yuuri supports him and loves him when it could be understandable to let jealousy get in the way. 
> 
> So... thanks for reading this. And I hope you enjoyed it. That all this was conveyed. 
> 
> Next chapter: finding the answer to Victor's question, NHK Trophy and preheat.


End file.
